A one sided conversation.

We have a lady in our social group who is just the same. Her family, her ailments, her new purchases, her menus….non-stop.
Nobody wants to sit with her and it is almost a bunfight to nab a seat on a different table. She never says she is short of friends, she is totally oblivious of her own unpopularity.

kircubbin2000 oh dear that's not nice.
I chat to both men and women ag my gym.

I admit I'm not interested in football but recently (last 3 weeks or so) have had casual but interesting interesting conversations about travel, healthcre, older parents, apprenticeships and dogs- today I've been talking about balance devices and the benefits of a "private" guide at museums and archaeological sites.

I'm sorry you find that your gym is different.
Do you have a member's area?

NotSpaghetti

What are the men like, jeanie99 regarding conversation?
Maybe try chatting with them?

I have found in groups of men I'm often ignored or the conversation switches suddenly when a more interesting man starts to talk football.I used to have coffee with a group at the gym and as soon as a new man joined I was forgotten.
Also found it strange one day when my friends son joined the group his dad ignored me and didn't introduce me.

I’ve noticed that too in some groups, a few people just don’t leave space for anyone else to join in. It can be tiring, especially if one person keeps focusing on you. I think it’s a shame because it makes it harder for them to make friends, but at the same time you want to enjoy the group without feeling drained. Hopefully you can keep enjoying the social side and spend more time with the people who do chat more naturally.

I would seat myself away from her jeanie. Don’t let her spoil the social gatherings for you.
Some people just love the sound of their own voice.

What are the men like, jeanie99 regarding conversation?
Maybe try chatting with them?

Funny, just the other day something popped up on my instagram feed; it was a woman teaching etiquette to children. This video showed the art of conversation, and how to be an engaged listener, and also respond to questions with more than just a yes or no, or for most children "I don't know"!

It was interesting to watch, and she had various children sitting around a dining table, learning manners and conversation. Well done.

I have a friend who talks non stop and she also has a condition (I think) which causes her to close her eyes when she is speaking which is very peculiar as there is no eye contact.
I have known her since we were 12 and I don’t want to upset her but all she ever talks about is her wealthy sister and people I have never heard of.

Retread

Luckygirl3

Maybe she is lonely ...

But, why does being lonely change anything? I've been lonely in my life but still had awareness when trying to make conversation, or friends!

I have stopped meeting up with some friends when a particular woman is invited.
She just doesn’t stop.
She’s not lonely. She’s out every day to one group or another.
Goes dancing Saturday night with her boyfriend.

When I worked in befriending I noticed that some people who had not spoken to anyone for days tended to talk a lot at least until they had told of everything they had been saving up. Now as a carer (my husband has dementia) I have noticed that I am in danger of doing the same and becoming a motor mouth if I haven't spoken to anyone for a while.

Grandmabatty

I have a dear friend like that who talks over you. When we get together as a quartet, we let it go. I think she is becoming increasingly deaf and doesn't always hear others are still talking

That's certainly a reason why I talk rather than listen in some situations - where the conditions are right & I can hear well, I'm told I'm a good listener.
And you're absolutely spot-on about talking over people.

I do understand about the ADHD though as I used to teach kids with a range of neuro diversity. They were delightful though and I did have to remind them to take a breath, they didn't mind, usually smirked and said 'sorry Miss' then carried on.

I'm still laughing. Now did I tell you about the time I.....no I won't go there, I promise.

M0nica

Some people with ADHD tend to talk non-stop. I say that as I have ADHD and I have learned to be conscious of this and control it, not always successfully.

I sometimes wonder if I have ADHD or some form of neurodiversity. I find myself interrupting people during a conversation or losing track of what I'm saying. However, I wonder at my age (early 60's) whether it's worth getting on the waiting list for a diagnosis.

I might end up in future going to an Age UK meeting and being like someone the OP has met!

I have a neighbour like that - she has 5 GC, but her conversation is all about 3 of them - the others don’t seem to be in her radar. I understand that you can’t always find that all your GC are interesting subjects of conversation, Tbh, I feel guilty if I talk about one of my GC. I have to talk about the others.

I am suffering from that just now, with a lovely friend. People you don't know, places she's been, things she's done etc etc.

We're on holiday, and everywhere go is punctuated with 'that's where I took a photo of X and Y when we were here', or 'A and B had a lovely meal in the Red Bull - it was fifty years ago, but they had the lamb with dauphinoise potatoes and they said it was lovely'. 😵‍💫

Oh, your comment about people you don't know rings bells, kircubbin! I have a close family member (in-law) who can talk for hours about her friends, acquaintances, neighbours in great detail. I haven't a clue who she's talking about and just nod and mmmm, all the while trying to get away from her just for a break!

Having said that, she does live alone and doesn't see her own family very often so I feel a bit sorry for her...probably the reason she always seems to latch on to me at family events.

Oh dear. I'm thinking of joining a walking group but you couldn't just walk off if you felt captured by someone. Luckily there's an arts month where I live, different venues in the county, so I could say ooh I just want to look at the paintings in the other room....cheerio!

Sorry pressed send too soon. I meant to add I know someone who does exactly that.

Oh my word! That is so familiar.

I have one friend like this. She can start her story by saying she got up for breakfast......etc for about 5 minutes before actually getting to the point. It's very hard to listen to.
She also regales us with long sagas about people we don't know.

Its a minefield Plevey. There are clique plus total bores who talk non stop about illnesses etc. The cadgers, forget the purses or find out if you've a car to take them out as they don't drive anymore and think someone else's petrol is totally free. .I only join a group if it is something I am interested in such as Art, History or something else. If a friendship were to develop thats a bonus.

The above responses made me laugh... hilarious! I know exactly what you mean. I'm not sure I'd be keen to go to a social club now 🤣

Retread

Luckygirl3

Maybe she is lonely ...

But, why does being lonely change anything? I've been lonely in my life but still had awareness when trying to make conversation, or friends!

I wonder whether some people realise, but dont care anyway.

Some people with ADHD tend to talk non-stop. I say that as I have ADHD and I have learned to be conscious of this and control it, not always successfully.