Well done in recognising something didn't seem right and/or it wasn't what you really wanted, then following through with the Dear John letter.
If he was a genuine person who lived near you, he would have wanted to meet up before saying he loved you and thinking of you as a possible partner. He would surely, also, have wanted to see how you got on with his son as well.
It does have all the hallmarks of a scam - so similar to the stories on TV etc.
He's not done anything illegal if he's simply used a fake profile but not actually asked for money or gifts . You might want to contact the dating site, if that's what you used, to suggest they check it out as you're not sure it's a genuine profile - it would no doubt be breaking their rules.
Beware possible contact from other scammers as, if he is a fake, he could have passed some of your details to other chancers ( not necessarily re dating but maybe finance deals or investment opportunities etc that seem too good to be true).
You sound like a warm, kind-hearted person who didn't want to disappoint this man ( if he was real). Stick to your guns about what you're looking for in a relationship and, whether the right person comes along or not, I'm sure we all wish you happiness and fulfillment in the years ahead.
Gransnet forums
Relationships
I recently "met" someone on line who supposedly lives not far from me. In the course of our talks he mentioned that he was divorced due to the fact that his ex had messed around. He also mentioned she passed soon after the divorce. They shared an eight year old son. I think he has full custody. He has been throwing out compliments almost from day one: "you're beautiful" .. "you're so funny." Among others until the I love you's. I realize that actions speak louder than words.
Regardless of the fact that he (in my opinion) is hoping that I will say it back and mean it ...I have had my share of helping to bring up someone's kids. I have my son that despite the fact he's 33, he still talks to me about whatever is going on in his mind at the time.
Long story short, I don't want or need someone's issues on my plate .. helping to raise another child with all that could entail is not in this woman's picture.
I wrote him a long "Dear John" and am calling it quits. I hate letting someone down but at this point in my life, my immediate family is more important.
MY LIFE WHATEVER IT CONTAINS IS MORE IMPORTANT.
Being a grown up isn't easy. 
but I'm trying.
I'm not asking you guys what to do ....I need your comments before I proceed.
Thanks!
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