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Difficult son

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Notjustaprettyface Fri 08-Apr-22 23:18:07

Hello
I know I have posted about this before but basically , I look after my grandchildren 2 days a week and my son ( the childrens uncle ) is resentful of this
He says I do too much for my daughter ( his sister ) and I shouldn’t etc
I am looking after the children again tomorrow as their parents are going to a wedding and I asked my son if I could pop round to see him for an hour to break the day and he just shouted at me saying Saturday is his only day off, he works hard and its not his problem he said
He thinks I should tell my daughter I don’t want to do it
And he won’t talk about it , he just shouts
I feel very sad as I love the grandkids , I am trying to help my daughter and I feel my son is treating me badly
I don’t know if his wife is influencing him ?
It’s a possibility
Anyway , I don’t know what to do , I don’t know how to handle it
As far as I am aware , I was a good mother to both my son and my daughter and I don’t know what I ve done to deserve this
As he left yesterday , after a shouting match , he said I could phone him tomorrow and if ‘ hes around’ to use his words , I can go round
But I don’t feel welcome and my instinct tells me not to go
Is this the right decision and long term , what do I do about this ?
I am in a bad place and just need help

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Oldladynewlife Sun 10-Apr-22 21:42:13

If I were he I’d be annoyed to have my limited free time “volunteered” as entertainment for grandma and babies.

Also both your children sound like they are a bit of a handful—your daughter can not take no for an answer and if you are waiting for her to realize you are overwhelmed you are going to have a long wait. Your son is not interested in being treated like an afterthought, to be visited only on the spur of the moment when it is convenient to treat him as entertainment.

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Allsorts Tue 12-Apr-22 07:58:55

I don’t understand why when you’re looking after the children you would ask their uncle if you could take the children around. I’m afraid you’ve let your son talk down to you, it sounds as if your son and daughter have become your total social life. Regarding your daughter, if you feel she is asking too much of you tell her, your not on the pay roll. Regain your position as mother and grandma, the first thing I would do is book a holiday in the uk by coach and leave them all to it. Whilst away decide how you want the rest of your life to be. You decide if you want to see the children as much or am finding it difficult. Don’t be dictated to by anyone. children become independent quite quickly and you need your own life too.

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