What o you do when you no longer want to?

Neither of us wants that, or is thinking of it. If that one thing is enough to wreck a long successful marriage then I guess it isn't worth it anyway. What you seem to be saying is that I better 'put up' or say goodbye to my husband, who puts sex ahead of anything else we have. So be it, in that case. It isn't me deciding against counselling either.

If counselling is ‘not ever going to happen’ and every approach by your OH is causing resentment, then your marriage is probably on the rocks. If he wants to remain sexually active and you do not, you should expect another woman to appear on the scene shortly.

When a wife rejects her husband repeatedly, he reads it as a personal insult. When he attempts to have sex with you, you see it as a ‘violation’. In both cases, that is more damaging to a relationship, however much it is otherwise good, than if you shouted personal abuse at one another.

Counselling would help. If you refuse to consider it, you are probably deciding that the marriage isn’t worth saving.

Funny how attitudes change. Time was you were looked down on if you enjoyed sex, now you are considered weird if you don’t.

I would imagine honest communication is key. Only you two can decide what constitutes ‘a relationship’.

Should a woman need to rectify what is a natural state, though?
Everyone is so different, and lots lose interest as they age.

You’re definitely not alone! Menopause does this, but it can be rectified. You need to speak yo your GP. Don’t feel bad, it’s very very normal. You love your husband, and that’s what’s important. Everything else can wait.?

Sorry you are feeling like this Pollyj it is ok to use the word sex on here.
You don't say how old you are and if your feelings are menopause related. There is help out there for menopause problems including loss of libido. Is it possible to talk to your Dr or practice nurse about this.
In the meantime talk to your husband about your feelings, you shouldn't be feeling pressured into having sex.