Husbands friends.

I think the idea of saying Pardon a few times and making someone repeat the insult is a good one! And then say after 3 insults 'I thought you said that but thought I was hearing things!' It is so much easier to think of a clever retort after the event!!

I've used this retort before......My, my it would seem that you were standing at the back of the queue when tact and diplomacy were given out or you would know that a little of each goes along way my dear!!

Next time she suggests you fast or go on a diet, just say "I am happy as I am".

Sometimes bullies back down when you stand up them.

Make similar remarks every time she says something unpleasant.

Speak in a pleasant tone and no-one can criticise you.

Good luck!

You dont have to be friends with your DHs friends spouses. He can go there without you

Next time she offers her opinion unasked just put her in her proper place .... the ironing-board cupboard springs to mind!!

Maybe I’m being charitable but maybe she is obsessed with diet and fasting and it’s the only conversation she has? Sounds like she has become very self centred and so she doesn’t think about your feelings or that you are quite capable of managing your own life. Dieters can easily lecture everyone else. If you can, don’t take it personally but you could say that there are conflicting views on fasting. It’s true and would call her out on assuming she knows it all and you don’t. Good luck and get your husband to help change the conversation when she starts going on.

These answers are great, except the ones who suggest you don’t go out. Why should you miss out because of this ironing board on legs? Loads of replies to choose from, go out and have some fun with them! ?

Some gransnetters won't like this but ...

You could call the woman 'twiggy' or ask her if she is suffering from anorexia/bulimia.

(To those who have suffered from the disease, this is not being derogatory towards you in any way. I was anorexic in the past but I can laugh now and love my curves/myself.)

Tell her your happy in your own skin

All these comments have cheered me so so much thank you.
The support in here is great.
Chloejo you did make me laugh out loud. If her aged, very nice MIL hadn’t been sitting next to me at the table I would have said what you said. ?

I'd respond saying "have you tried engaging your brain before opening your mouth".

Or maybe "at least if I fall over my face wouldn't hit the floor!"

I would definitely not be going anywhere near her again and if my OH didn't support me he would know about it after a few days of silence and sleeping alone!

Just say, 'I prefer to look like a real woman, thank you'.

Londonwifi Just a sad headshake and a sympathetic, 'Poor you' should be enough and if she queries it, smile, 'I think you know.'

Unfortunately, it is well known that obsessive exercise and dieting does affect the brain. Many anorexics genuinely see their emaciated bodies as fat. Bulimia and Anorexia are mental illnesses.

I hope you've got a lot of strength from these very positive replies.

It's such a pity that so many women still think self-starvation is healthy and the only way to be acceptable. Very sad.

So much good advice and great comments here, Londonwifi. You say that your husband is 'lilly-livered, and I would certainly agree. Why give this very unpleasant woman the satisfaction of sinking to her level by responding with put down remarks? I would choose not to be in her company at any time.

What a nasty person she sounds! Think I would be tempted to respond with "and that's your business because?........" next time she commented on your figure. And your husband should be supporting you not some shallow twig!

I love all the replies here stand up to her say my husband likes big tits and a curvy body he doesn’t like thin women with flat chests

You have had some sound advice here and I cannot really come up with anything much better. Perhaps, said with a polite smile and a very calm voice ‘ do you realise how offensive that remark was? I’m feeling really hurt’. If she tries to object, you simply stick your guns. I am really hurt by your offensive remark.... Good luck.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I am happy at size 14/16. My sister always gets a dig in. The last time I went for a flu jab, she said, in her concerned voice, did the nurse mention your weight ? I replied 'Why should she? ' For once that nonplussed her. She had to explain why she had made the remark. So she just looked arkward and said nothing. . You could try something similar. Good luck!

She sounds horrible. I would just tell her that you are happy with the way you are and are not interested in fasting or dieting.

Maybe. ? Grannyhall29

"Presence" stupid predictive text

Sounds to me as if she is jealous of you, maybe she knows that her husband really prefers a woman with a shape instead of a stick and feels insecure in your preacence

MadMaggie. I really feel for you. My situation sounds so minuscule in comparison. Hold your head up. You know that you are the better person, Hugs.

Londonwifi, I've only read 3 pages but I'd ask your husband to read all these replies, some very good indeed, & when he's read to the end, or perhaps just some that you've picked out especially, ask for his thoughts. If he says he can't be bothered I would tell him you didn't feel like 'being bothered' to start this post, but if he'd supported you in the first place, rather than allowing his friend to undermine you none of this would have been necessary. He probably hadn't wanted to start any trouble with his friends & by taking that stance is just a weakling.