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Am I a prude?

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onaclearday Sat 09-Nov-19 09:12:31

I am in my late 70s, married twice and recently met a lovely caring kind widower. In both my marriages I enjoyed a mutually satisfying physical relationship. The new man in my life has revealed that his wife didn't like sex and he read porn magazines to relieve his needs and has looked at porn on the internet. I was totally shocked as I never expected that. Our relationship is still in the development stage. He insists that all men read porn but I don't believe that. If either of my husbands had those magazines I would have found them, believe me. He has discussed this with his daughters (40/50 year olds) and they think it is normal. I find this weird. It is not something I could discuss with any of my children or friends. Can you , dear gransnetters, please enlighten me as to whether or not I have led a sheltered life and if I am being narrow minded to see this in the same light as dirty old men in raincoats? I can't get the images out of my head ....

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SparklyGrandma Wed 13-Nov-19 23:02:45

I promised myself that I would never ever live in a house surrounded by porn again. My divorce prompted me to promise myself that.

Just knowing that it was in the house, being used regularly, made me feel awful.

I am not a prude and I don’t think you are, onaclearday you just know what you want or don’t want.

If you don’t want porn in your relationship, assert it.

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MissAdventure Thu 14-Nov-19 21:06:44

I think porn is addictive if the person watching it has an addictive personality (and nothing else to do)

Its much the same as shopping, drinking, smoking pot, and any number of other activities.

Most people can dabble, but some people are always going to have problems.

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