Getting a bit fed up of her showing off

Is she a Hyacinth? Does she actually realise what she's doing?

I used to have a friend who 'moved up in the world' and found that she hated it. They became rich enough to own the 'big house' of the village and have a housekeeper and gardener - a married couple who lived in a bungalow on the estate (yes that kind of money). She found that she could no longer be friends with the ordinary village people because there was a gulf between them and she didn't like the people who now saw her as a potential friend. She described them as people who wouldn't have given her the time of day if she was still living on a council estate but now she was socially acceptable. She didn't feel there was anybody who liked her just for herself. She didn't feel she had to impress anybody but I can see how another person might.

I know how it feels, having one sibling very rich. What do your other siblings think? My sis agrees with me about our bro and call him " the big I am" , my sister calls him a w...er!
But somewhere she must be insecure or unhappy , never know what goes on behind closed doors.

If she's not normally like this then just perhaps she's excited at having moved to a great new house and the fact that they are coming into a sizeable sum of money. Wouldn't you want to discuss such things with a very close sibling? Are you sure you're not just a little bit envious?

I have four siblings who own their homes, I rent, they holidayed several times a year, I don't, I like to hear about their holidays, if any of them goes to a social function I ask if they had an enjoyable evening, when they change their cars I like to hear which car they have chosen, thankfully I have never known envy

'Thankfully I have never known envy' .......That sounds like a real dig
Nothing the OP has said indicates she's jealous she has said catergorically that she isn't jealous and has felt glad for her sister all through her life You can't say fairer than that
When people are rich or having a great lifestyle they need to just get on with it no one enjoys conversations with a braggart especially repeated conversations
I would feel a lot nicer towards OPs sister if she had told us the sister had a plentiful lifestyle but often included her in treats or helped her out when in difficulties She didn't say any of that perhaps she ll come back and tell us more

People are different in the things they think are important.

I know people who work all hours God sends to accumulate money and stuff and I know people who are happy less stuff but lead a much more relaxed lifestyle.

I don't think it is just you bytheway your sister sounds thoughtless at best. I know what it's like to struggle and to have this kind of constant bragging thrown in your face can wear you down after a while. There are plenty people with a lot of money or luxury lifestyles but they don't go around belittling those who are less fortunate ( or not as lucky) as they are.

Bluebell, up to you how you choose to read a post, I was speaking of my feelings towards my siblings affluent life styles , I am happy for them.

I wish I could say that I wouldn't envy someone with an easier lifestyle. It must be wonderfully peaceful and calming to know that the bills will always get paid in time and you don't have to work your whole life just to get by. I wouldn't envy anyone's big house, fancy car or luxury holidays etc. But what I wouldn't give for the peace of mind.

I think she is simply showing off ...look at me ....requiring lots of admiration. Some people I know from years ago seem to relish this on FB...while beforehand would not have indulged in narcissistic behaviour. Best thing to do is ignore it completely..don"t go along with it. It seems everything has gone to her head. What do your other siblings say? Do they comment.? Think you"lle have to sound a bit bored next time she phones you and a bit more bored still the next time after that...so she eventually gets the message.

But Gilly, it's their life style , I have never wanted my siblings to have the struggles I have

I agree Anniebach but aren't family meant to stick together and help each other ? Well no one in my immediate family has much but what we have we share . I do have a very rich uncle who will no doubt have had deep pockets sewn into his shroud. He and his 2nd wife used to visit my parents just to get some weird kick out of rubbing their noses in their wealth.

You're a much nicer person than me Annie

Do you think she feels competitive with you? Is she the middle one? Sometimes middle children feel they have to shout to be heard. It does sound to me as though it's some old childhood stuff. Good luck with it.

I remember when my mum got a much longed for new sofa ( she'd had the last one for about 25 years) my uncles ( nasty) 2nd wife remarked " why did you get a new sofa M ? It's not as though you get many visitors to see it !" My mum was so taken aback she laughed but then was very upset later .

I agree with Anniebach and don't envy anybody their lifestyle. I have enough and a lot more than some. People shouldn't be judged by what they have but what they are. The OP says she isn't envious just fed up so maybe she could just tell her sister that gently, because there may be some unhappiness that she knows nothing about. Such a pity if their relationship is spoilt by this. And YES I agree Facebook has a lot to answer for!

What is wrong with knowing your family is doing so well.?
Would you prefer to change places with the mothers of those whose daughters cannot afford to pay the increase in their rent as husband has been made redundant and are having to resort to food banks to feed their children.?
Be happy for her. What harm is it doing or is there a touch of the green eyed monster somewhere in there.?

Glad to see you mention Hyacinth vampirequeen, I too had been thinking about the 'Bucket' syndrome as I read through this page.

gilybob No shortage these days of people who take pleasure in raining on someone's parade.
I am sure your mum enjoyed her new sofa regardless.

People shouldn't be judged by what they have but what they are.

That's the point though, isn't it, Caro1954? The OP's sister will be judged by others, not because she's wealthy, but because she's a show-off. It's not an attractive personality trait, and will lose her friends. It's a shame she's not more self-aware, but she's not likely to take it kindly if the OP tells her what she thinks. I'd just try to laugh it off, bytheway.

I once read a study that came to the conclusion that the happiest people are not the wealthiest, but those comfortable enough not to have to worry about their bills, and to be able to afford occasional holidays and treats. Perhaps it's true that (extra) money doesn't buy you happiness.

I have a friend who talks on and on about herself and her issues etc. and doesn't let anyone get a word in. Worse than that, when I try to tell her one of my stories, she'll interrupts with "....oh, me too..that's what we did when...etc. etc. etc."....and I'm left hanging mid sentence.

On the plus side she is a really good friend and genuinely cares about others. She's an animal lover and generous to a fault. I also think she suffers from adult Attention Deficit Disorder. My point being that no one is perfect (as long as they're not deliberately selfish or mean spirited).

Yes she did Sarah but sadly not for long. She died only a few months after she got it .

The same "person" came to my mums funeral and looking through a photograph album I had put together she found a photograph of my mum taken at mine and DH's wedding. She looked lovely in a deep purple jacket and lilac flowered skirt . The colours really suited her and she looked so happy. "Oh that suit" she said " your mum really begrudged paying all that money for something she would only wear once"
I told her that my mum had worn it in many other occasions both separate and as a suit . "Hmm" she said " a bit dressy for shopping I would have thought" .
The woman has an evil tongue !

I must be dimmer than I thought , I really don't care what people have , well yes I do rant about the costs of the windsors .

Hi, just to answer a few of your question, no i am not envious, I am perfectly happily married, reasonably comfortably in our middle age with a lovely family so not an issue for me.

She does treat other people, usually younger members of the family (her girls and her nephews and nieces, all grown up) and she does do charitable work.

When i discussed the situation with my DH he said that a family BBQ last year one of my sister-in-laws had mentioned how 'above herself' my sister was getting. He didn't mention it to me at the time as he didn't want to make waves and because he (DH) had had similar thoughts.

I've also noticed she does seem to have a habit of 'sparring' with one of our other siblings on our family WATSAPP group. And i sometimes find myself trying to calm the waters there.

I did have another thought, and that is that growing up she was always seen as, how should i put this.....the least intelligent of the 5 of us, i.e. she is older than me but there were many occasions when i did her homework for her.

So, perhaps its a case of 'look what i have achieved' when i was the one least expected to achieve? what do you think?

I think she might be subconsciously in awe of her circumstances and just has to talk about them! I am very lucky that I have similar privileges because of my husband, but I never talk about what we have and what we haven't. Its so crass. We choose to live in a normal street, in a normal house and spend the money on other things that we enjoy, such as holidays etc to the annoyance of some of my acquaintances unfortunately. We don't actually tell anybody when we go on holiday because the green eyed monster always appears! Nobody bothers to ask me where I have been anymore...because of the monster. Its so silly! My sister, brother and I came from a relatively humble background, we do not discuss money or material objects, its not important in the scheme of things. I can remember many times when I didn't have two halfpennies to rub together and i don't forget where I came from. it could all be gone tommorrow. Ignore it, it doesn't matter. As long as you have your health and are happy in your own life thats all that matters.