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No - I am NOT an Xmas "Pity Project!"

(62 Posts)
Minerva Thu 12-Dec-19 11:48:08

That made me laugh BradfordLass. We used to have my mother brought to us on Christmas Day and ‘Old Auntie’ , her sister-in-law, until they each died in their 90s. They were both glad to come but Mother was not happy to share the day with Auntie who I knew well as she lived not very far from me and I would mow her lawns and do some shopping. Auntie was a bit forthright but was as nice as pie on Christmas day and the picture of the old curmudgeon just reminded of Mother’s disapproving look at the dining table. We never knew what her problem was but I sat them as far from each other as I could.

Vintagegal13 Thu 12-Dec-19 11:46:13

This will be my 3rd Christmas alone (widowed just before Christmas 2017). No-one has invited me anywhere, and I would love to be invited for coffee and a mince pie. My neighbours are pleasant, but all have their own arrangements - most go to their families. As for being alone at Christmas, I am alone all bloody year!! I keep a brave/happy face on, as I don't want to depress people, but it does hurt. I would dearly love to even host Christmas for lonely people, but I don't have any near me.

Margs Thu 12-Dec-19 11:43:22

Would you want any kind of invitation from next door neighbours who had their Xmas topped off by TWO police patrol cars pulling up outside their front door on Xmas afternoon?

I wondered what the shouting was about....

sunseeker Thu 12-Dec-19 11:39:07

"along"!!!! I meant alone blush

sunseeker Thu 12-Dec-19 11:38:33

I have been on my own for a number of years now and am happy to spend the day along. However, whilst I wouldn't want to have Christmas lunch with a neighbour I would welcome an invitation for a Christmas Eve or Boxing Day drink (I would settle for a coffee!).

I wish I had neighbours who were so thoughtful.

timetogo2016 Thu 12-Dec-19 11:31:25

Kindness goes along way it`s a rare thing these days.
Would you not invite someone who lived alone to share Christmas day/dinner .
I would and have.

QuaintIrene Thu 12-Dec-19 11:29:28

Wasn’t it nice to be asked? Even a little bit ?
I can see how this will go. Nice people trying to win you round, in the hope that at heart there is a chink of compassion in everyone and you will see how curmudgeonly you are and all will be well when you realise how silly you were.
It’s like a film.

Riverwalk Thu 12-Dec-19 11:24:15

I'm surprised you get any invitations! tchgrin

notanan2 Thu 12-Dec-19 11:23:16

Maybe your neighbours need you there? Maybe theyre worried that their families will be doing their own thing and they want to buold a new tradition of mixing friends with family so that they dont end up alone?

BradfordLass72 Thu 12-Dec-19 11:15:36

Frankly, I'd be very grateful if someone cared enough about me to offer an invitation and wouldn't dream of seeing it as a 'pity invitation' - just sheer kindness.

They must be pretty darned brave in your neighbourhood, as it would certainly spoil my Christmas to have some elderly curmudgeon scowling at me over the turkey.

notanan2 Thu 12-Dec-19 11:11:07

Well you don't sound happy..

If you were happily alone people might not try to cheer you up. But you do sound very miserable and bitter about your circumstances..

Margs Thu 12-Dec-19 10:59:11

I've lived alone for many,many years and at this time of year it's always the same and I veer between bored or amused or angry or insulted.

Why?

There is usually an invitation from at least one of the neighbours to "Xmas dinner with us - you MUST be very lonely. Isn't it depressing being on your own especially at this time of the year?"

Well, no actually. I'm OK on my own and ESPECIALLY at this time of the year. Faux jollity doesn't do it for me and furthermore I don't think I was put on this earth to be treated like a sad pet just so you can bask in smug complacency and imagine you are doing your Christian Duty!