passed away

I have to add that swearing about will not make me change my mind.

It is, of course, up to each person what they say but that does include us Anya

Another word is deceased, which is what they use here in France - decede. I like that.
I once said in french that we had "lost" our dog, and our french neighbour offered to help find him.
A classic range of words is in the Monty Python deceased parrot sketch, I won't give the link as it could be seen as bad taste.

I agree Far North and Anya, it is entirely up to the bereaved person.
Also perhaps, what you are used to hearing and saying.I always say died about all my family and friends and so does everyone I know .

Sign outside Maelor Hospital read 'Please Pass Quietly' ...true

lilygran . Also re passing -wind . Not ideal!

I think the same as Anya. Grief is such a personal experience to be struggled through in any way one can cope with

I was caught out by 'passed'. I thought someone had taken an exam. Fortunately, in a film, not in real life. 'Congratulations' not an appropriate response.

It's up to everyone to choose their own way of expressing death. If the old lady next to me refers to her beloved cat passing 'over the rainbow bridge' so be it. If someone phones me in distress to tell me her father has just 'passed away' that's fine and if I get a call to say my aunt has just 'died' that's ok too.

WTF has it got to do with anyone else?

My 6 year old GS was looking at 4 photos of my parents and my OH's parents. He asked where they lived and I told him where they used to live and that they had died. He asked if he had ever seen any of them before they died, and I answered this. He wanted to know when they had died. He was very matter of fact about this and I would not have dreamt of using a euphemism.

I think it is euphemistic in exactly the same way that whispering or talking behind the hand used to be and, to be honest, it seems to be more about the insecurity of the person talking with others than anything else. If someone has died that is what they have done. If I was talking to someone recently bereaved I would listen to what they said and, if they used something other than died I would just avoid it.

How about "over the rainbow bridge" for pets. [cringes]

I agree that died is more straightforward and sensible and yet I found myself saying passed away, about a close relative.
A bereaved person can't be expected to be totally logical about this but a professional should definitely say clearly if they are talking about death.

Does it matter ? If the bereaved feel more able to say passed on/over/away than dead then this is all that matters

You get a Drs line to be off work

Thanks thatbags I won't mind it now; I thought it came from across the pond. I still take a "line" when I go for my "messages"!

Turning in the grave?

Turned as of an age is a very Scottish turn of phrase. "She turned five last week".

Another vote for "died" from me. I think using euphemistic words for death is another sign of our modern fear of death. It used to be a much closer thing to most people.

You are all right; this is a little off the subject, but how about the term "turned" much used to say someone become 30 or had a 30th birthday (I wish!) is about to turn 30?

Saying somebody has passed, or passed over is very American, they never quite like to say died( sounds so final, ) which of course, it is!

Teetime.

I entirely agree. All this 'passing' away or over or whatever always reminds me of pass the parcel. My mother (who in the words of Mma Ramotswe has become late) used to talk of when she would die as "when I become an estate". Very grandiose. I always loved the Salvation Army phrase for it -'promoted to glory' but wouldn't have the nerve to say more than that someone has died.

As a nurse I was trained to day 'died' so there can be no doubt about what has happened. My mother was one of those people who mouth words thought to be upsetting rather than say them - infuriating habit.

Another one that's used on the Alzheimer's forum e.g. "Dad has gone" ....for a walk ?

I have to admit that I have to restrain myself from asking if they've looked down the back of the sofa when someone says they've 'lost' somebody