passed away

I have to say I don't like either, I always use the word 'died'. As recently as yesterday when 5 year old GD asked me where my dad is, I told her that he died before she was born then spoke a little about him. She wasn't fazed.

baubles I also always use the word 'died'. I would feel uncomfortable saying 'passed away'.

I say died, too. When my grandfather died we received a telegram from my granny saying he had passed over. I was only little and it had me flummoxed for ages.

I hate the word "passed" too! "Passed away" is a euphemism we are used to, but "passed over" sounds like Madame Arcati!

I am amused however by Mma Ramotswe using the term "late" not as in "my late father" which we all say, but "her father who was late"!
Makes school register-taking sound a bit funereal

"Passing" etc. all sound a bit uncertain, I suppose because of The Passing of Arthur by Tennyson, describing the trip to Avilion.

I have to admit that I have to restrain myself from asking if they've looked down the back of the sofa when someone says they've 'lost' somebody

Another one that's used on the Alzheimer's forum e.g. "Dad has gone" ....for a walk ?

As a nurse I was trained to day 'died' so there can be no doubt about what has happened. My mother was one of those people who mouth words thought to be upsetting rather than say them - infuriating habit.

I entirely agree. All this 'passing' away or over or whatever always reminds me of pass the parcel. My mother (who in the words of Mma Ramotswe has become late) used to talk of when she would die as "when I become an estate". Very grandiose. I always loved the Salvation Army phrase for it -'promoted to glory' but wouldn't have the nerve to say more than that someone has died.

Teetime.

Saying somebody has passed, or passed over is very American, they never quite like to say died( sounds so final, ) which of course, it is!

You are all right; this is a little off the subject, but how about the term "turned" much used to say someone become 30 or had a 30th birthday (I wish!) is about to turn 30?

Another vote for "died" from me. I think using euphemistic words for death is another sign of our modern fear of death. It used to be a much closer thing to most people.

Turned as of an age is a very Scottish turn of phrase. "She turned five last week".

Turning in the grave?

Thanks thatbags I won't mind it now; I thought it came from across the pond. I still take a "line" when I go for my "messages"!

You get a Drs line to be off work

Does it matter ? If the bereaved feel more able to say passed on/over/away than dead then this is all that matters

I agree that died is more straightforward and sensible and yet I found myself saying passed away, about a close relative.
A bereaved person can't be expected to be totally logical about this but a professional should definitely say clearly if they are talking about death.

I think it is euphemistic in exactly the same way that whispering or talking behind the hand used to be and, to be honest, it seems to be more about the insecurity of the person talking with others than anything else. If someone has died that is what they have done. If I was talking to someone recently bereaved I would listen to what they said and, if they used something other than died I would just avoid it.

How about "over the rainbow bridge" for pets. [cringes]

My 6 year old GS was looking at 4 photos of my parents and my OH's parents. He asked where they lived and I told him where they used to live and that they had died. He asked if he had ever seen any of them before they died, and I answered this. He wanted to know when they had died. He was very matter of fact about this and I would not have dreamt of using a euphemism.

It's up to everyone to choose their own way of expressing death. If the old lady next to me refers to her beloved cat passing 'over the rainbow bridge' so be it. If someone phones me in distress to tell me her father has just 'passed away' that's fine and if I get a call to say my aunt has just 'died' that's ok too.

WTF has it got to do with anyone else?

I was caught out by 'passed'. I thought someone had taken an exam. Fortunately, in a film, not in real life. 'Congratulations' not an appropriate response.

I think the same as Anya. Grief is such a personal experience to be struggled through in any way one can cope with