Lending/gifting money to children

I don’t think cheek, even bare-faced comes close! I’m sorry you’re upset and probably now trying to understand what they see you as - an open purse?
I’d think seriously about giving your daughter PoAs at some point.

Think of yourself, try to put this in its box and continue to recover.

No way would ever give up my "home" and investments and nobody else should either.

Other investments or property that are likely to attract IHT it's your choice, many do give away extra wealth but not the home.

Itsa shame they don't spend time working out their own finances instead of yours.

You really do need to firmly tell them no, so they're left in no doubt that there's no more discussions to be had.

Hearing that you're just getting over cancer makes it all the more insensitive and greedy, to say the least.

What a *** cheek!

My reply would be "what makes you think that our assets should now become your assets? And by the way, thanks for enquiring about my health!!"

Please say no and keep saying no. I assume your sil wants you to gift your house to them , which could cause issues with hmrc and SS if you need help with care when you’re older as it’s deprivation of assets .
Plus if your DP contributed to the mortgage, and is on the deeds he’d have to agree to it.
As for the other GP helping out , that’s not your concern.

Nelli123

Another aspect to this is that I've only recently recovered from breast cancer and this was the first time I saw them after completing my treatment as I was too tired to travel or have them over as a family. And this is the welcome I got!

Oh Nelli, what rubbish timing on his part! 💐

How dare he!

Tell them (him?) you are leaving everything to the Donkey Sanctuary so not to have any expectations now or in the future.
Surely your daughter should have been a party to this conversation as well or was he testing the waters?
As they say on mumsnet, no is a complete sentence.

mokryna

If they live in France, the law is that, if their parents do not have enough money for food, housing or health care they and their siblings have to pay, according to their income. The government will take it from the source.
If the subject ever comes up again, ask them if they are ready to pay for all your needs.

Tell AB. That will sort his social care problem out.

The cheek of it!
I would not be getting into more debt at your age. If they want to move they must work out how much of their own money they will have as a deposit on the next one. If that means downsizing a little or buying a do-er upper, so be it.
It sounds like they have been discussing this as your daughter keeps mentioning house moves.
I would put the kibosh on it straight away. If you don't then they will assume there is a chance. It will cause more unpleasantness if they think you will agree and then be told, no.

No wonder you were gobsmaked, I'm sorry you had such a conversation at a time when you've just recovered from breast cancer. Honestly! Outrageous cheek, bad enough from your child but their partner, grabby and grasping doesn't even begin to describe it. I'd have his card marked as to how I'd frame any inheritance.

That's very interesting mockryna

Another aspect to this is that I've only recently recovered from breast cancer and this was the first time I saw them after completing my treatment as I was too tired to travel or have them over as a family. And this is the welcome I got!

It sounds to me that they have been discussing this.

I can just imagine the conversation between them before he left for the airport…..

Knock that on the head straight away.

I would not trust them at all now, make sure they cannot access your property or paperwork. They have no respect for you or for your partner

If they live in France, the law is that, if their parents do not have enough money for food, housing or health care they and their siblings have to pay, according to their income. The government will take it from the source.
If the subject ever comes up again, ask them if they are ready to pay for all your needs.

You are mortgage free, and he had the cheek to suggest that you remortgage, or sell your house and give them the money
Tell him that at your time of life, both you and your partner intend to enjoy life, with what savings you have ,and have no intention of remortgaging you house, those days are behind you. when someone has the nerve to suggest that, then don't be afraid to say exactly what you think..

Abdolutly not. I would say no with no excuses. Mumsnet would have another name for this pair.
Honestly does your lson in law have no shame? They are too entitled.

You are thinking of disposal of assets.

I hope you are just wanting to express your feelings here a bit and not seriously looking at renting (or whatever) when they are perfectly fine as they are?
What the other grandparents do is irrelevant.

One daughter thinks I should, jokingly (?) give her some of my savings. She already has had an advance on her inheritance to pay the tax when buying their big house. They are comfortably off. I didn’t reply but it does hurt. Fortunately, her sisters don’t ask for anything.
Yours take the biscuit Nelli123.

I should also add that they got a lot of help from his parents in getting a mortgage for the current house they have. Maybe he thinks it's now our turn to help out as they've exhausted that source. Also, they live in the EU so not even in this country, which muddies waters even further. I read somewhere that if you gift your financial assets it may be a problem if and when you need care assistance, as any previous house ownership is taken into account in calculating the payments.

Tell him you're going skiing.
(Spending the Kids' Inheritance.)

"They are being cheekywhatsits"
They certainly are, or is it just him, the cheeky b****r?

Wow... cheeky! I agree with NotSpaghetti. Knock it on the head straight away.

What a cheek he has asking you to either sell your house and rent or take a mortgage to give them the money! Of course the answer is a definite no and don’t feel you have to justify it. They already own a house and if they can’t afford a more expensive one they should be content with the house they have. Don’t make a big deal of it just say no.