Severe Health Anxiety

butterandjam

@Doodledog " You have my sympathy - as I say, the ridicule from some quarters is almost as bad as the condition - but even without that, *you are going through the same feelings as someone who does have the diseases you imagine. "

No, she is not.

"The fact that you don't have them is neither here nor there - in your head you do, so you feel the same feelings.*"

How very fortunate you must be, to believe that.

IME, the opposite is true. There is no comparison.

Imaginary/unfounded fears/anxiety are absolutely NOTHING LIKE being faced with the real thing; the cancer diagnosis, permanent organ failure, the no-going-back life-changing treatment; the "we're very sorry" terminal prognosis.

Well, I assume that (a) you haven't suffered health anxiety, and (b) you are confident that the way you see things applies to everyone, but I can assure you that being convinced you have something means going through agonies, as, you are genuinely feeling the same physical symptoms (sufferers don't make them up, or exaggerate them, as many people think) and as far as you are aware you do have the disease you believe you have.

I recognise that nothing I can say will convince you that you are wrong, as you are shouting, so I won't say more, but would like to reiterate to the OP that I do understand what she is going through, and I also know how lonely it can be when others are intolerant and dismissive of her feelings.

I hesitated before posting, as I was afraid of a response like yours, but figured that it was worth trying to reassure Citygirl that she is not alone, and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It is decades since I had HA, but I well remember how painful it was.

Please be honest with your Doctors CityGirl1. It’s the only way. All the best to you. 💐

I checked out Duloxetine as I’d never heard of it and it seems to cause sleep problems so it might be worth mentioning it to the doctor. Having said that it does seem to help with several other issues. When I was on antidepressants I was put on zispin because as my doctor pointed out ‘ you need to sleep’ but I only worked part time so was able to work round the sedative effect.

Citygirl
You say that you suffer with health anxiety. Are you aware of what is happening to your body in these attacks?
Your body is flooded with adrenaline. It’s a fuel to enable you to fight or flight.
As you are probably doing neither that fuel has nowhere to go.
It can cause more damage than you are imagining.

If you enjoy your job so much why fo you have you retire? Could you work less hours, I am 75 and still work 3 days/week. Great, I tried retirement hated it so changed to a new nurses role which I have never regretted. It states off a lot of health threats by keeping my mind busy, interacting with other people having fun and learning new things all the time. Never a dull moment

I forgot to mention a workplace assessment as it could be the position you take when going your role eg if using a computer at the wrong height etc position can lead to s lot of neck or back pain.

I suffered in the past with anxiety and its quite illogical. Yes you can reason that there is nothing to be anxious about, but the worrying part of your brain knows better. I have had therapy and CBT with limited success, but I actually found the Nerva App an absolute godsend. I started on it due to Irritable Bowel Syndrome, brought on by excessive worrying, but it has had far more effect than just clearing up the IBS. It takes a while. About three months in my case, but now I have tool I can use whenever I feel anxious about anything. I used the App every night at first (for fifteen minutes before bed), but now just when I feel I need it. Its based on breath work and visualisation. So simple, but so powerful.

The O/P has said she has done CBT and it has not helped. Citygirl1
Your options then can also be to consider deeper psychotherapy ie psychoanalytic psychotherapy which looks at the course of your life and what has given rise to the level of anxieties you have. It costs, and one need to do it over quite a period of time, but it helped me a great deal.

I am also trained as a psychotherapist (tho not at psychoanalytic level) and the difference between it an CBT is that CBT gives you an idea of how your thought processes are working including Catastrophising. However, some people cannot as it were "put the knowledge into practice:

Doogledog you are quite right in your reply to ButterJam above, because a degree of mental illness, which is what we are discussing here, can be as crippling as the emotions surrounding physical health yes even as regards dying and loss.

Telling someone off and that they have "lesser" problems is unkind whatever aliments we suffer with.

*Citygirl1 I beleive the opportunity that has helped me more than anything over the years is to join a nice sociable gym. (Like the Nuffield chain of middle. level priced gyms - they have coffee rooms, they have lessons where yo meet others, they have decent equipment and friendly personal trainers, they have sometimes an in house physio, and high level trainers who can dress your own difficulties.

A good one is open from 6am to 9 or 10pm, so as it were, you need not be alone in the evening, the sauna for aches and pains and chats, I recommend classes: you can start when you are still at work then just carry on after retirement.

It's been my home from home for 25 years. It's friendly in the changing rooms, especially in the day time when retirees turn up.

Above all, exercise is good for body and mind, confidence building.

You do have to actually like exercise to make the very most of it, but there are plenty there I know that find something they like, whether its dance Zumba, or Pilates, or other general exercise classes, specialist classes for older people or special exercise needs, if you chose the right one.

M0nica

Citygirl1 So I do not know about stress and depression? Well my DH died suddenly a fortnight. ago. He had had the first symptoms of his illness about 15 years ago, but would not acknowledge them, then did, then had a heart attack during COVID followed by hospital sourced further medical problems etc etc. So for the last 15 years. My first task each morning was to check DH had not died in the night. As his illnesses got worse, I was checking might and morning and in the night if I woke, until one night when on holiday, I woke to find he had gone down stairs so I went to see what the matter was and as I went down the stairs I saw him lying on the floor and I knew the inevitable had finally happened. I am finding this a tiny bit stressful,

Then, of course, during DH's illness, the NHS had a good concerted effort to kill DD by forgetting to order a key test during a telephone appointment and then refusing to see her or order the test when she rang in with alarming symptoms. She ended up being critically ill. 'critical' means 'may not survive'. I found that a little bit stressful.

More to the point when I was a child, until the age of 13 I had a bowel problem that caused faecal incontinence. You can imagine what that was like at school. During those years I formulated a philosophy of never making a bad situation worse. However bad you felt, how scared or unhappy. Do nothing to make the situation worse. Where possible look for something to at least stabilise the situation. It might be no more than just staying tranquil and suffering silently. But I never make things worse by not doing things that would help, no matter how bad I feel.

In future think a bit and verify your facts before saying of anybody I don't think you understand what stress and depression is like. You really do not know their lives and they could well be offering their advice from the depth of experience.

You didn't say this in your initial post so how was I to know? I am sorry for what you have been through. Everyone reacts to stress differently.

I can't vetify the facts if I don't know them.

Doodledog

butterandjam

@Doodledog " You have my sympathy - as I say, the ridicule from some quarters is almost as bad as the condition - but even without that, *you are going through the same feelings as someone who does have the diseases you imagine. "

No, she is not.

"The fact that you don't have them is neither here nor there - in your head you do, so you feel the same feelings.*"

How very fortunate you must be, to believe that.

IME, the opposite is true. There is no comparison.

Imaginary/unfounded fears/anxiety are absolutely NOTHING LIKE being faced with the real thing; the cancer diagnosis, permanent organ failure, the no-going-back life-changing treatment; the "we're very sorry" terminal prognosis.

Well, I assume that (a) you haven't suffered health anxiety, and (b) you are confident that the way you see things applies to everyone, but I can assure you that being convinced you have something means going through agonies, as, you are genuinely feeling the same physical symptoms (sufferers don't make them up, or exaggerate them, as many people think) and as far as you are aware you do have the disease you believe you have.

I recognise that nothing I can say will convince you that you are wrong, as you are shouting, so I won't say more, but would like to reiterate to the OP that I do understand what she is going through, and I also know how lonely it can be when others are intolerant and dismissive of her feelings.

I hesitated before posting, as I was afraid of a response like yours, but figured that it was worth trying to reassure Citygirl that she is not alone, and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It is decades since I had HA, but I well remember how painful it was.

This is true. It's awful for people who do have illnesses but health anxiety is also real and the fear is crippling.

Jenthehen

If you enjoy your job so much why fo you have you retire? Could you work less hours, I am 75 and still work 3 days/week. Great, I tried retirement hated it so changed to a new nurses role which I have never regretted. It states off a lot of health threats by keeping my mind busy, interacting with other people having fun and learning new things all the time. Never a dull moment

Because whee I work the pension is different. If I don't retire on my retirment date I lose part of my pension and I can't afford to do this.

I recognise that nothing I can say will convince you that you are wrong, as you are shouting,

That is unfair and rude, Doodledog (. ?)The comment was fair, considered and realistic.
'Not shouting.'

Capital letters online are widely recognised as shouting.

My comment was not rude, it was explaining why I would not respond further to that post - I don't engage with people who are shouting. If you can explain why you think my reply was rude I will reconsider, but having reread it I can't see anything rude about it.

I do understand that on a thread like this one people's experiences are going to vary, and those feelings may well be raw, but none of us knows what others are feeling, so telling them that their feelings are nothing like someone else's is very unfair, particularly when the OP has said that she is suffering.

One of the many awful things about health anxiety is, as I said, the lack of understanding and respect for sufferers' feelings, which are ver real to them.

I recognise that nothing I can say will convince you that you are wrong, as you are shouting so I won't say more, but would like to reiterate to the OP that I do understand what she is going through, and I also know how lonely it can be when others are intolerant and dismissive of her feelings.

I was quoting from the above in a long thread, and I assumedto be written by you, hence the question mark. If it was written by someone else then I apologise for naming you, but not for my opinion of the sentiments expressed.

...... on a thread like this one people's experiences are going to vary, and those feelings may well be raw, but none of us knows what others are feeling, so telling them that their feelings are nothing like someone else's is very unfair, particularly when the OP has said that she is suffering.

One of the many awful things about health anxiety is, as I said, the lack of understanding and respect for sufferers' feelings, which are ver real to them.

Though I suffer no anxiety of any sort, I understand we are all different - things that bother one person may not bother another. Perhaps best to merely comment on sadness for the sufferer.

Citygirl1, I am sorry.

Doodledog

Capital letters online are widely recognised as shouting.

My comment was not rude, it was explaining why I would not respond further to that post - I don't engage with people who are shouting. If you can explain why you think my reply was rude I will reconsider, but having reread it I can't see anything rude about it.

I do understand that on a thread like this one people's experiences are going to vary, and those feelings may well be raw, but none of us knows what others are feeling, so telling them that their feelings are nothing like someone else's is very unfair, particularly when the OP has said that she is suffering.

One of the many awful things about health anxiety is, as I said, the lack of understanding and respect for sufferers' feelings, which are ver real to them.

Sentences of words in capital letters certainly can be construed as shouting.

A couple of words in capitals in a paragraph is emphasis.

Apart from that l totally agree with you.

I too suffer health anxiety and on medication, its a horrible thing. I average about 3 hours of broken sleep per night which I know is awful, and although I know that 'a good night's sleep' is necessary for good health, it seems like many people who suggest we get this think it's a choice. Believe me if I could choose a good night's sleep I would! Tried every suggestion in the book over 40 - 50 years and nothing helps. With regard to your neck problems, can I ask do you read a lot in bed when you dont sleep or in the chair, as I have found I had to give this up in favour of audible books, the position affected my neck badly. Also you mention about feeling better at work. Distraction is my best method to cope with anxiety, so have you got 'go to' methods at home to help you cope? I find easy phone puzzles or crosswords just take the edge of things. I hooe you can find some relief, anxiety is an awful thing, and very misunderstood. x

Night:

A go to method I use at times are wave sounds, this one in particular, no advert breaks after the initial one: I have it on my lap top next to me when I sleep.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ef9CAZ3OrQ

there are also rain sounds, streams and more, except watch to get one that says "continuous" unless you subscribe to U tube anyway.

There is a free app called Rain Rain, which I love - it is a library of rain sounds, from rain on a window to crashing thunder, and well worth a try, IMO.

Doodledog

There is a free app called Rain Rain, which I love - it is a library of rain sounds, from rain on a window to crashing thunder, and well worth a try, IMO.

I’d be running to the loo every five minutes? Even running the kitchen tap sets me off sometimes …

Citygirl, as you probably realise, the very nature of health anxiety means it’s almost impossible to convince anyone that they are well. It’s a very lonely place to be in and you may want to try to seek some more support other than that you already have. Eg counselling (not CBT), a body based activity, like t’ai chi or pilates, meditation-you may be able to find this online, or an holistic or energy based therapy. None of this will be a magical cure but it all helps.
Working with unwell people for decades, my understanding is that clicking joints is most usually small gas bubbles and is very common and nothing to worry about. Pre existing stress or anxiety also affects the way our bodies function and so your stiffness and aching is most likely down to that, given that you’ve been checked out and it can decrease when at work. This knowledge alone may not reassure you because I think there are other aspects of your life that aren’t sitting easily for you right now and that feed into this and so it would be good to find someone that will give you the space and time to explore this.
Know that there is an ‘explosion’ of anxiety of all sorts at the moment and you are not alone. Go gently, try to eat well and sleep when you can. I know that’s easier said than done. This time will pass.

Stillness I think that is spot on advice/analysis.

And also that Citygirl1 probably needs someone to "walk with her" her in order to make these changes bit by bit.

If what Stillness has said chimes with you - ie the body/mind mix both in terms of how you are as you are and ways forward - then not a CBT or psychotherapy, but a supportive counsellor /health trainer to check in with on that journey.

As someone who also suffers from extreme anxiety from time to time, all I can say is I understand how miserable it is and hope you find the help you need. A mantra I use is "This too shall pass".

Hi. I think you could get your employer to do a workstation assessment on you due to the pain you are experiencing. Most of us do get aches and pains as we age. There are no guarantees that you will not face difficulties in your current accommodation. Is there a lift? I would be exploring alternatives.

This is a site that helped me ......

www.nomorepanic.co.uk/forum.php