Black Dog 20

EllieAnne Is there a relative you could get a lift with? 9 hours is a very long time to be driving. Too long. I'd be tempted to not go but send flowers though.

nadateturbe I'm glad your daughter's tests came back ok. Yes, worrying about our children is something we do as mums, and it doesn't stop when they are grown-up with their own families, does it?

ScaredyCat SIL seems settled and well at the moment, so that's good. It's a shame her (adult) GC don't bother with her any more, but perhaps they want to remember her as she was. I hope you're keeping well.

It's a lovely bright day, sunny with a blue sky. Did aqua aerobics then had brunch with my friend. Hope ALL BDers are ok today x

EllieAnne I think you should maybe think about what Whiff has said.

Ellie Anne so sorry for your news and troubles. Whiffs advice is good
Sorry all too miserable and fed up to post tonight. I think we’re just going round in circles. No consistent thoughts from any of the doctors.
Hope you’re all ok. Much love ❤️

Thanks everyone. I did wonder if one of my sons might go but I doubt it as they are not terribly close to dh s family because of the distance and it would probably mean a t least 3 days off work which would be difficult for them. He hasn’t said anything yet but we don’t know dates yet.
I’m pretty sure he will want to go but he doesn’t know about my little episode.
I know if something happened to him none of his family would come here because of the distance and health concerns.
I understand he will want to see his other brothers but when you get older it’s not always possible.

Doodle you must be worn out with worry and your own health. I hope you are eating healthy and drinking plenty of fluids. And resting as much as you can. I know how hard it is worrying about the man you love and feeling helpless to do anything to relieve his pain and suffering . Also I know how easy to neglect yourself. But you must stay strong and look after your own health. Don't reject any offers of help as those who love you both with be feeling useless. Take care and try and stay positive.

Ellie Anne could your husband go to his brother's funeral by himself . And to be honest you aren't well enough to make such a long journey.

Wyllow as always glad to see your message every night.

EllieAnne- sometimes the sensible decision is the one to take .
Nine hours is a very long drive especially with the weather being so volatile at the moment. I understand your DH wants to see his brothers but better for him to wait until Spring or Summer. I,m sure his family would understand that right now the drive is too much for you both. He doesn’t know about your episode so perhaps now is the time to tell him. Try not to distress yourself too much - it will get sorted.
HVDY- glad your SiL is fairly settled at the moment. It’s sad that her GC don’t see her. Sometimes people are scared to see those they love with this terrible illness but once they have will feel glad they did.
It’s a beautiful day here too but sooo cold- glad you,ve had nice things to do. I,m ok thanks just getting used to my new ‘ears’!!!
Nadateturbe- glad your daughter’s scan was clear - you must have been so worried. I,m sorry she has arthritis too - it can be so painful. There certainly is no worry worse than your children’s problems. Hope you feel stronger today.
Doodle- so concerned for you both. The inconsistency from the treatment your DH is getting is causing you both so much anguish. I do hope you are able to rest and eat to keep your strength up. The hospital needs to up its game and give you more help and information. Take care and sending love.
Whiff - kind advice as usual.x
Wyllow- pleased to see your message - so glad you are here.
Take care all - old and new friends

Doodle It's no wonder you're feeling thoroughly down. You battle on for your DH and you have all your own health problems at present too. I'm so sorry. I just wish there was something we could do. I think Dr's can change their minds to fit in with other situations on the ward too which doesn't help you at all. Stay well and bash a pillow if you feel like it!
You will get through this, you and Mr D together. Praying and hoping for better and more consistent news tomorrow. Hope you can sleep. x
EllieAnne My son has been doing a long drive, around 7hrs for work and he gets shattered after it , and he's early 40s.
I would consider other's suggestions carefully. You could send a nice card and explain it would be too much for you both to do and send your sympathy. Ultimately its your own and DH's decision. As Scaredycat says, maybe it's time to tell your DH about your own health too.
Nadateturbe I tried to send the link (it's in my email box) but couldn't make it work- just ended up with my personal photos in gallery and was afraid I'd send something personal by mistake. Tbh I don't think the videos were anything extraordinary. I usually imagine sea waves and the sound which was what one of them was. Another was the sound of rain which just made me want to wee!
Hope you're feeling a little stronger.
Scaredycat Glad you're getting used to your new 'ears'. It must take some getting used to - being able to hear all the quieter sounds.
HVDY Glad you had a nice lunch with friend and you've been to aqua aerobics. Sounds a good day.
Whiff What a lovely helpful post to EllieAnne and to Doodle. Hope you're OK.
Wyllow Sending love and hoping you get better times soon.

DH had eye test at optician this morning. Still bad head but our own GP not there this week. I've been doped up all afternoon with painkillers.
Wishing everyone a peaceful night. X

Sorry, my last words seem v 'matter of fact'. Don't mean to sound emotionless.

Good to catch up with news all despite people's rough times and good night BD's

Scaredycat I often wonder why hospitals and doctors surgeries have such uncomfortable chairs, when they are for sick people, especially in A&E where you can be sitting a long time.
The photo book sounds like a good idea.
Housework definitely takes a back seat. I think as one gets older one has to prioritise. Although my kitchen and bathroom are always very clean.
Sweetpeasue I'm sorry you're in such pain. And your poor husband too. Next week is such a long time to be waiting to see your doctor. Is nothing helping?
Don't worry about the links at all.

Doodle thinking of you both and hoping you get some answers and more help soon. You must be so exhausted and worn down with it all. Love and prayers with you.
EllieAnne as Scaredycat says, better to be sensible. But of course it's your decision.

Was awake all Sunday nightwith lower stomach pain, woke husband as I needed him in beside me, so Monday we were both shattered. Jigsaw day for me.

HVDY glad you had a nice day yesterday.
Good idea about sending flowers instead of making a long journey.
Whiff thoughtful posts to Doodle and EllieAnne.
Wyllow3 hope you are OK.

Wyllow Good to see your post.
Scaredycat My oramorph and co-codamol help a lot thankyou.Its DH I'd like to see a GP but he wants to wait till a certain one is on.
I 'm so sorry about your stomach pain -it sounds awful . I understand you wanting your husband with you- its frightening to get it so bad. I wonder if its part of your ME or something else. Hope you have a restorative day today.

Hope everyone has a decent day .I've psychologist appt. Bright morning and v cold here.

Hello all. I am freezing. My hands are so cold. Think it’s just me as DH is ok. Think I have a chill.
Ellie Anne if your DH really wants to go to his brothers funeral, is there any other family close by could take him.?
If not just tell him you don’t feel comfortable driving all that way and suggest a combination of taxis, trains, whatever is easiest.
Whiff I am not eating much but drinking water. I’m fed up with hospital food but too tired to prepare my own when I get home. Yes sons are being very good.
Scaredycat good idea for Ellie Anne to suggest her husband sees family in the summer. I can’t understand why I’m so cold. Must be a chill. I’m warming my bottom on the radiator in DHs room 🤣. Be careful if you go out walking. It’s so icy and cold. Nice to have a bit of sunshine though.
Glad your new ears are working well
Sweetpasue it is hard when the doctors keep changing their mind every couple of days. DH just wants to go home and is getting more and more frustrated as time goes on.
Thank you for your prayers and kind thoughts.
Sorry you’re still needing so many painkillers, Hope your head feels better soon.
Wyllow glad you’re still with us. Take care xx
nadaterurbe thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers.
Sorry you’ve had such a bad night. Hope it’s a better day today.

Doodle Oh I hope you're not getting any virus ,being so chilled.All you need. It's certainly much colder. Just had Psychology session and there was sleet there in the town.Within 20 mins we were driving into thick snow and everything covered.Still snowing thickly.
Radiators are great bottom warmers, I've done the same on ours! I can see how very frustrating it is when your DH gets his hopes up about coming home only to be dashed by Dr's. Do hope he gets home soon.Hospital food is not great here either. Its DH who has this constant headache and fog(my post was misleading). Thinking of you.

Hope everyone having a decent day and don't have too much driving to do in snow.

I’m not trying to be negative but all his family down south and we only have our sons here. I have no other family.
I did look up trains £500 one way with several changes.

I know we will probably fall out over it .

Wow Ellie Anne. That’s expensive. Does your DH drive himself? IF so, let him go on his own.

EllieAnne I can only echo Doodle. That's a tremendous expense , especially taking into account you couldn't possibly do the journey without an overnight stay. I don't think it's fair on yourself tbh.

ScaredyCat DIL's GC haven't bothered with her for some years (before the Alzheimer's, which was diagnosed summer 2020). It's a shame, SIL came from a large family (12 of them), and now some have since died, some are living further away. Glad you're getting on well with your new ears .

Doodle It's been bitterly cold here today (Nottingham) but no snow or anything. Hope you've warmed up a bit and that your husband gets better news tomorrow

SweetpeaSue I hope your husband feels better tomorrow and that he's able to get to see "his" GP soon. How was the psychology session?

EllieAnne That's very expensive! Surely the relatives would understand if you and your husband didn't go?

nadaterurbe I hope today has been better for you, and that you have a decent rest tonight.

Wyllow3, Whiff, Candy6, and ALL BDers - hope you all have a good night's rest x

Nadateturbe I'm so sorry-only just realised that my post of 9-54 this morning was addressed to Scaredycatinstead of yourself. I was rushing out to appt .
Scaredycat Apologies to yourself about mistaken name. Hope you're OK.
HVDY Thankyou my psychology session was good. He's so easy to talk to.
I thought I'd seen on forecast you'd had snow there this morning but see you've escaped. It did look nice here though it's all melted now.

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Sweetpeasue it's OK. I understood it was for me. . Glad the session was good. I hope it's been helpful.
Thanks. I think my stomach was just ibs, but it was severe. I'm going easy on food.
Sods law, I'm feeling better and husband is in bed. We seem to alternate a lot in looking after each other.
I hope your husband copes all right until he sees the GP.

Doodle I hope you've warmed up and managed to have a hot meal. I'm glad you have your sons for support. And I hope your DH gets sorted soon.x

HVDY I find my gc don't bother much. I think they are occupied with building careers and socialising. I'm not an important part of their lives. You'd think though if their granny is so ill that your SiL's gc would make an effort.

Nadateturbe I believe severe IBS is extremely painful so I've no doubt it was agony for you. So glad it's passed.
Hope your husband feels better soon. If it's not one thing it's another.
When my husband first had signs of Polymyalgia (sept)he was referred to a Rheumatologist though it was considered too long to wait for the urgent appt nearly 5mths! However he left appt in place and he will see him in a couple of weeks. If GP can't explain headache, hoping Rheumatologist can.
Hope you sleep tonight.🤞

EllieAnne I hope you're OK. I think we all feel the same about you making that journey. Please look after yourself. x
Scaredycat how are you. Does this severe cold affect the AF?
Hello to Whiff Wyllow3 and all BDs.
Hope you are surviving this very cold spell.

My son hasn't been in touch since Christmas. Rang tonight. Has been very depressed for no reason. Actually went and stayed in a hotel last week for 4 nights as he didn't want to speak to anyone, even his partner. Couldn't get a GP appointment until next Mon. from before Christmas! I was able to reassure him from reading experiences here that ADs would probably help.
Interesting thing. An 80 years old homeless man was sleeping rough near the hotel and wouldn't be seen by social services for 2 days. My son paid for him to stay in the hotel until then.
I wonder if he would have survived outside. Shocking that he was left to it.