Older person - no appetite

The person I am talking about is very old. Hopefully not end of life. And does very much still want to live as far as I know.

We are thinking she may have turned a corner thankfully. Will see what today brings.

A poster mentioned metatone. She has had that in the past. She likes familiar things on the whole. So will get in a bottle of that. Because of the tiny amounts of food she has been eating, I think she must be lacking in the vitamins and minerals.

Yes Monica, totally get what you are saying. The OP is not clear about the situation. Thinking back about my own mother, triggered my reply. She had all her head to the very end and hated being totally dependent, and did not want to be 'force fed' - as she put it.

MOnica My mother had a very sweet tooth, which she'd fought against all her life. By the time she was very ill, the priority was to get calories in her, so I think she was quite grateful not to eat the healthy stuff, but be given "permission" to eat chocolate and ice cream.

The OP doesn't say whether her friend has difficulty swallowing. If it's more a case of no appetite, all the gloopy stuff might be unnecessary. That's why I wondered what her favourite food is.

Fleurpepper I wasn't really thinking of end of life situations when a person just gives up. I was thinking of those times when if you are ill food has no attraction or savour.

I looked after a relation suffering from depression, who once that was under control, returned to normal and enjoyed his food. When he was in hospital he had a variety of these meal replacements and they looked revolting and their consistency and flavour turned my stomach. I think he recovered because he realised that he would be stuck in hospital with these awful replacement meals until he was eating again and eating was the lesser of 2 evils

He decided to move into a care home and I visited him one day and he told me how he that morning he couldn't be bothered to go down for breakfast, and the next thing he knew, one of the carers came in with a tray with a lovely cooked breakfast, he thought they were being kind and thoughtful (they were). I recognized that, knowing his history they had taken immediate action to stop him drifting back into non-eating by starting to skip meals,

Also Monica, depends on how old the person is, and how they feel about life and continuing 'for the sake of' - like you, the thought of being encouraged to eat, to the point of being constantly 'force fed', is abhorrent. Very old people have always chosen, consciously or not, to eat less and less and fade away.

My mother hated all the cajoling and constant encouragement to feed or be fed- and saw it as an infringement on her decision that she had had a good innings, but blind and without the use of her legs, jsut wanted to quietly fade away and be let to be.

I have just been looking after my friend, post operation. Her absolute must have favourite in times of just not wanting to eat is potato, very well mashed with lots of butter and cheese. She got me quite addicted. Also discovered Bonne Maman mousses. But my all time favourite is proper home made chicken soup. It may often be the butt of jokes, but those Jewish ladies really do know what they are talking about.

growstuff I was interested to read that your mother hated all those nutritional drinks because I cannot see that I would ever willingly consume anyof them. I am mildly lactose intolerant and anything containing milk or even appearing milky makes me feel sick. Also I do not have a sweet tooth, which discounts a lot of them and really really loathe foods that have fake flavourings. They also taste of chemicals.

One of my great fears is of being ill enough to be off my food and have people plying me with those drinks/nutrition and trying to make me consume them.

I think I would be tempted by pieces of cheese, cherry tomatoes, diced cucumber, tiny pieces of bread and butter, everything to be savoury and nothing sweet.

I used to make egg custard for my mum.

Bijou - always lovely to hear from you. Guiness was recommended over the years as it contained iron, but the main benefit was that it was calorific, so in poorer areas it would be suggested as "medicinal" for nursing mothers, who might well be under nourished. In hard times, the meat in such families was for the working men.

HowVeryDareYou2 is right at this stage it does not matter what they eat as long as there's a good calorie intake. Lidl does a lovely rice pudding made with clotted cream, it is almost as good as a homemade one with farmer calories. small portions but often, finger food between meals anything what so ever including chocolates and jellies. You can get frozen jellies which are good to add to their liquid intake. Usually custards, rice puddings, trifle, sponge puddings and any milk pudding goes dow well as well as soup, stews, mashed potatoes, sweet Jacket potato and the like is usually popular too. Ensure comes in many flavours you can get a trial pack on prescription so the "patient" can choose which they prefer. You can also have ensure fruit juices and soups on prescription if the GP thinks it is required.

What does the person usually like to eat?

When my Mum was very ill, she hated all the nutrition foods and drinks, but absolutely wolfed down jelly and ice cream and small bits of cake and caramel chocolate.

If the gp agrees to orescribe.

Think home made soups are great and can be put into small amounts which might tempt the person. sometimes it is also good to have made the soup elsewhere. Usually the smell of food cooking encourages us to eat, but when I was having chemo etc the smell of food just put me off everything, so a friend made some soup at her house, put them in individual amounts and we froze them and then it was simple to just use a microwave to heat a small portion and with some lovely home made bread or a roll could be tempting. A sweet treat which is also using up food! Take a banana , split lengthways and put in a dish for the microwave. Put a small amount of orange juice - from a packet is fine, a little brown sugar and a small amount of brandy, or whiskey or rum. whatever they happen to like. Put in microwave and you have banana flambe with out the flames but warm and comforting and a little treat to enjoy. Agree with the dried fruits too, get some good dried apricots and pears, which are to hand. Oh making me hungry now! Hope this is a help

Juicylucy Fortisip is available to buy (chemist's, Amazon, etc) but obviously free on prescription

Things that slide over easily in very small portions. Scrambled egg, rice pudding, custard with raspberries/steawberries, liquid soups.

This sounds very similar to my Mum's recent illness.
She enjoyed drinking warm fruit squash so I made it with dioralyte and also put a dose of Metatone in it. She used a straw to drink through.

When she could face solid food we started with jelly and custard - metatone in the jelly, complan in the custard - and just tiny amounts. I tried to make sure that everything she ate was as nutritious as it could be, so made custard with Jersey milk for example.

I agree that you eat with your eyes first, so it was worth the effort to arrange things attractively, even if it was just one slice of peeled apple and half a grape - every little helps!
Good luck.

vickya

Soft boiled egg(s) taken out of shell and into a large glass or glass bowl with slices,(fingers) of fresh wholemeal (or white) B&B. They can dip them in the egg and mop up with them.

A little white fish in parsley/white sauce and some mash and peas.

What about some chips from the chip shop?

A peanut and jam or marmalade sandwich, fresh sliced bread. I'm thinking children food is good.

A fresh jam donut? Scone,butter, jam?

My mother was a great believer in white fish wrapped around a Dairylea triangle, and a small spoonful of mashed potato!

I used to keep small white bread salmon sandwiches handy when my father was ill, as he often would fancy something, then have ‘lost the notion’ by the time it had been prepared.

Fortisip is very good for this sort of thing. Not sure if it’s prescription only though.

All good advice but make sure it is good that the person really likes. I hate porridge when aim well so I’d definitely hate it if I was ill.

Also I presume there are no foods are not suitable. I am diabetic so lots of the puddingy things I wouldn’t be able to eat

Wow Bijou, impressive.

Here’s to you,*Bijou*! A Guinness a day never hurt anyone. 😃
Cheers!
USA Gundy

After an illness my doctor gave me some sports drinks but I cannot Remember what ones.
Just by the way.
When I was a child in the 1920s my mother was poorly the doctor prescribed a Guiness a day and a weeks holiday at Brighton! We had a holiday.
She had a Guiness a day every day until she died a 92!
I have have had a Guiness a day and am shortly be 100.

Home made soup blended and served in a mug,to sip and fruit balls made with different dried fruit and nuts,rolled small and served in tiny paper cup on a fancy plate ?

As they say you eat with your eyes. I’m on medication that kills my appetite so I never feel hungry. I eat because I know I’ve got to. Smoothies homemade full of fruit and veggies. Soup and a sandwich whatever she likes make her but in small portions

I would definitely give small amounts often, if giving soup try giving it in a Cup at the side of something like little pieces of cheese with some nice bread and butter or quiche leave a a cold drink like squash or flavoured water as the side of the side of them so they can sip throughout the day. I used to find with my mother if you stuck to small amounts often rather than a huge plate which overwhelmed her. Try breakfast , mid morning snack tea cake/ crumpet , light lunch , afternoon snack cake or a banana and custard/ rice pudding/ yoghurt then their evening meal if they stay up you can try an evening snack too before bed or something like Ovaltine or Horlicks and a biscuit.