Independent living?!

Sorry you're having such a difficult time annsixty. Its a sair fecht as we say up here.

Referred to SS!!!

My H fell on Feb11 and on that day I was asked if I wanted us to be referred to As for an assessment and a carecall pendant in case of emergencies like the fall, I said yes please.
My H came out on Feb 26th.
I was asked if we wanted a carecall pendant , I said it had been referred.
To cut its short ewe still haven't even been visited or contacted about it.
It has been referred by the carers, by the team leader, e-mails have gone back and forth.
In the 2nd week at home my H had another bad fall, if we had had a pendant we could have got someone out.
As it was I had to ring the ambulance service and my H was on the floor for 2 hours before some one came out.
I have told the carers not to persue it, rather than pay the £8 a week it costs, I will rely on the NHS to come and deal with any more falls he may have.

I think until it comes from the same budget, then there is no hope of the elderly getting anything like the quality of care that others get.

Care of the elderly comes from a different budget! Good care costs. We have to work out how to provide it better.
BTW my neighbour does have an alarm to press but she was unconscious for a while after falling then too confused to use it. She just plain needs 24 hour care in a warm place with regular meals and help with medication and personal care.

I have worked with various adults with learning disabilities who have their own council property, with adequate care going in.
Enough to provide support 24/7, and including holidays, shopping, and sleep in staff.

We can all only hope that we don't end up alone, vulnerable and at the mercy of 'visiting care in the community'. My neighbour decided that she wanted to stay in her own house - beware of what you wish for, it may come true!!

And yet, and yet Jane - it is not for me- this is NOT what I want- so no, care homes are not the desired future for all. Even though care homes here where I live have amazingly high standards.

Although it does sound that this is what your neighbour needs, poor thing.

I don't think my neighbour has capacity to make decisions for herself any more unfortunately. Her only relative lives far away and makes very occasional visits.
Not all care homes are bad!! I have direct experience of excellent ones. With good standards set, good management and well trained and paid staff there is no reason why they couldn't provide much better places to live (and work-no more rushing from house to house against the clock!)

People make their decisions even if we don't agree with them, if your neighbour is able to do this then there is not much you can do. I reiterate, we leave the care of the most vulnerable in our society to the least well equipped to do it.

Good quality care homes could be a solution but not the disgusting excuse of "care" homes available to those unable to pay for the best. I also have experience of visiting in "care" homes and they were both just as OldMeg said. Smelly and stale with unqualified (probably minimum wage) staff . I certainly wouldn't want to end my days in one of those places.

It can work to stay in your own home, although I don't know much about it. DS's next door neighbour lived alone until a few weeks before she died aged 96. She had a fall and went into hospital, came out with a care package but went back in just as her daughter had found her a place in a Star and Garter home. She died a few days later.

Her son lived at least 3 hours away, her daughter in Italy. The person DS bought his house from used to give her a hot meal each day and continued to visit after moving out as did a few other neighbours. She had a stair lift and could just about manage everything herself. Apparently she told wonderful stories about her early life.

It is wonderful to think that neighbours can be so caring but I don't suppose that happens very much.

Gilly is right in saying that more money, be it taxes or whatever, is needed but I doubt anyone would vote for that.

A friend's father had a fall recently and used his 'button' to call for help; I imagine the service was private, but is there any chance your neighbour could afford to pay for that, Jane?

She was paying £600 a week, self funded.

Only trouble Jane.I visited someone recently in a residential care home. Not to be recommended. Apart from one qualified nurse, the rest of the staff were all the same lowly paid ‘care assistants’ who man the home type care service. Poorly paid, unqualified.

The place had a smell of boiled cabbage and old bodies. There was one communal room with a TV blaring away so it was either that or stay in your room.

I really do think that residential care homes are the way ahead. With good standard setting and monitoring they could be a cost effective and kind way of looking after vulnerable elderly people. More and more will be required. If people have the funds they should use them or take out special insurance policies to cover their eventual care needs. I know we have national insurance etc but this is something different. Times have changed and care provision needs to change.

Of course many old folk are paying for this themselves and the standard of care is just as poor.

Its such a pity.
Surely bringing back home helps would be ideal?
Fetching in a bit of shopping, doing a tiny bit of tidying, and having time to spend helping the person to keep body and soul together.

My grandma's care log quite often read like a work of fiction MissA, but I get that the carers were often run ragged, having to do the work of two people alone,paid a pittance, putting up with all kinds of abuse etc.

I remember several occasions when one of my grandmas carers would ring me and say she was very poorly and could I get there ASAP. This usually meant that someone had to wait with her until I got there which in turn meant that they would be late for (or heaven forbid even miss) the next call.

Care companies are closing left right and centre because they don't get enough per hour from SS to cover their costs.

It really is a ticking time bomb.

I had similar problems with my mums care Ann.
Some days were: breakfast at 11.30.
Lunch: 2pm.
Dinner: 3.45.
Bed: 5.30.
Then they would write that mum 'didn't want dinner' and be on their way within 3 mins of arriving.

My H who has Alzheimer's was recently in hospital for 2 weeks after a fall and I insisted on a care package before I would have him home.
It took about 5 days to arrange it but I stuck to my guns.
He was very immobile and at 80 I am not physically able to lift him.
We got a six week package from SS it comes to an end on Friday of this week.
The carers have been very good in the limited time they have but the timings were awful.
I cancelled the evening call in the first week as it was 8:30pm, he had been inbed and asleep for an hour and a half by that time.
The morning call was 11am, OK the first couple of weeks but as he improved it was hard to keep him in pyjamas and dressing gown until then.
They were nearly always late and twice I rang at 11:45 to cancel the visit as I coped.
Communication between the carers and the office were terrible. Equipment took weeks to arrive, one still isn't here, too late now.
We are not going on to a private agency as we are coping now he is more mobile and quite frankly I haven't heard anything that fills me with confidence.
I feel so sad and sorry for people on their own. My H has me to stand up for him as I have had to do, particularly during the hospital stay.
It was not a good experience.

the free personal care differs across the Health board regions.I know my late mother had brilliant care when she needed it.I know others from different health board regions who haven't been as lucky

Actually most of the points you raise are valid gilly.

It doesn’t work across the border either Jane10 but I don’t know what the solution could be ?

I can’t honestly think of a way forward other than reducing the inheritance tax thresholds quite significantly and/or putting charges on properties for payments after death .

Does anyone else have any better ideas ?

We can’t expect some of our young people to foot the bill for everything via direct and indirect taxation .

I remember reading some time ago about one poor soul who had actually died when the council transferred to a different care provider and she somehow got missed off various lists. It really doesn't bear thinking about.