grandchildren and deodorant

We had four boys at home, not sure what was worse the boy smell or the overuse of lynx 🤣🤣🤣

I wouldn’t push your DiL’s buttons as you have posted that she is touchy

BlueBelle

Afraid you are out of order it’s not your business to be telling your son and when that didn’t work you went to the daughter in law to tell her how and when HER son should wash
oh my oh my broken all the rules there, stay out of it If he stays over your house encourage him to have a shower and you can have sone deodorant at yours, but to tell his mum at what time of day he should wash!!! No wonder she’s touchy
Are you really needing to ask if you are out of order 😂🤣😂

This is where I fall too.

Like a child going to each parent to get the answer they wanted!

My eldest GD is 12, and I started buying her some nice toiletries a year ago - deodorants, shower gels, bubble bath, etc.

Oh no, you pointed it out tice to different parents?

Please don't do this again, he is only 11 and doesn't need a complex

Out of order definitely. I wouldn’t dream of saying this to my daughter-in-law and I wouldn’t have appreciated my mil telling me .

Perhaps your DIL didn't have brothers pooger24?!
Teenaged boys can be very niffy.
But it isn't up to you to tell her what to do with her children. Maybe your son thought this too and didn't say anything to her.
I suggest you could leave a deodrant in the bathroom, something that a boy this age might like. When my sons were young it was Lynx.

GrannyGravy13

We had four boys at home, not sure what was worse the boy smell or the overuse of lynx 🤣🤣🤣

I wouldn’t push your DiL’s buttons as you have posted that she is touchy

Now, I may be wrong here, but saying that the daughter in law is ‘touchy’ makes me infer that granny may have offered advice before. It really is not your job to comment on his personal hygiene to either parent.

Of course you were right to mention it. Do they want their child ridiculed at school. I didn't need to mention it to my daughter with her 11yr old son, she just went out and brought him body sprays and I keep some here when he stays and he carries one in his bag when he has PE.Why should you have to watch what you say, you don't want people avoiding him at school, maybe son and daughter need a reality check.

My son entered the Lynx phase at about 12 when I said “ you stink, wash”The smell of that deodorant was horrendous ….I swear he sprayed the whole house…. Your grandson is 11 ….give it another 12-18months….

I think you should tell him yourself, gently. Hon, I love you a lot but could you please shower more?

Yes and no. Obv you are concerned for his cleanliness and hygiene, which is good, but suggesting he washes first to dghtr-in-law, may possibly imply she isn’t doing good enough. Trust me, I was somebody’s dghtr in law once and I think I’d take it the wrong way. But then everybody’s different.

Don’t say anymore and get into a Family argument - Believe you me his School Mates will deal with it - If his Teachers get a “ Whiff” as well they will be on to his Parents .

Sorry Yes you’re out of order 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think you have said what you can for now. Next time you see him suggest in a kind way that he gets in the shower more often or someone at school will.
I can remember 50+ years ago two girls in our class at Grammar school lifting their desk lids to find BO written in thick chalk. I can also remember a school trip when no one would share the double bed with the girl with BO.
It's better coming from a family member. I told my GD she was a smelly Nelly when she was staying last year, she took it in good part and used some shower gel I had and asked to take it home.
Good Luck.

It’s his age, they just at that age where start smelling , and not quite into smelling nice and constant showers. How about buying him a nice set of male smelliest, shower gel doedorant and hair product. Go for a not to smelly or natural one, that’s the age friends joke at them if they smell all aftershave and too nice… lots of more natural ones now if parents not keen on chemicals at his age. He will soon be discovering girls and be in shower constantly..

My grandson is now 15 and has a “ girlfriend”, so he smells really nice first thing or when going out. But he came to me straight from school the other day to mow my lawn, and was very smelly, hardly surprising in this heat, after being in a classroom all day. I said nothing, as he was on his way home and would shower and change there.
Soe maybe it depends what time of day your grandson comes to you, OP. If it is straight after school, he will be smelly.

I think you're doing the right thing in pursuing this. He may start to get comments at school which would be unpleasant for him, especially if it's from girls.

Having worked with disadvantaged groups of children who came from temporary homes where they may not have been able to wash or get clean clothes, it was embarrassing for them, as classmates made comments. We gave a group chat with a few on washing and using a deodorant. How sad that some wouldn't even have been able to afford a deodorant. At least there was help with uniform, due to unclaimed lost property.

GrannyGravy13, ‘We had four boys at home, not sure what was worse the boy smell or the overuse of lynx 🤣🤣🤣’

I’d say the Lynx every time!

I dreaded the hot summer days in an airless classroom with 11 year old boys.

Telling your son has to be enough. Wait for the Lynx phase. Danger alert meddling with family as a gran.

There was one post above where gran was close enough to GS to suggest a shower. That's really fortunate, but unsusal.

Granmarderby10 “the Lynx phase and all it entails”

Made me chuckle 😂👍

I think a quiet tactful word with your grandson is fine, better than him getting called names at school. I wouldn’t mention it to his parents though, as you say they might take it as criticism.
I’d also suggest that a roll on is better than a spray and should be applied under the arms not all over his clothes 😩

I had this issue with a 60+ Single male cousin. Trapped in a car with him one day I mentioned the word deodorant - apparently he had been told as a youth that Deodorant was bad and clogged up the pores, etc, and was told to wash thoroughly …this he did and has always been well washed and turned out…but in warm circumstances of course this doesn’t hold up! I never had any further pongs from him but still don’t know if he started using deodorant - tho I did avoid being too close!

It depends how close you are. I helped bring my grandson up and we are very close. When puberty hit and he started to smell, I along with his mum encouraged him to shower before school and I bought him his first deodorant. Not a problem at all.

Totally out of order!