Looking for some advice

Do they treat you to meals? Take you out for lunch? Cook for you?

They sound just awful. I’m really sorry.

I’d send a message saying you won’t be committing to regular childcare after the school holidays as it’s too much for you now. You’ve loved spending all that time with X and still want to see her and them all regularly, but as a grandma not as childcare. Please do get in touch in emergencies as of course you’ll step in if you can.

If they cut you off then they are vile scum ?

I think you should tell them 2-3 days is too much, your doctor has told you to cut back and rest, on the driving as much as the child watching. Tell them you would love to do 1 day (give this a go? You may regret stopping altogether once you're a bit better rested?) as you cherish the time and you know dgd does too. I would point out that if you work yourself past the point that is healthy for you you will likely become less reliable due to sickness etc, and that you desperately don't want to let them down. WHEN they try to brush you off, as I'm sure they will, be firm and just say 'hear me, i love you all, but i cannot continue like this, i need help from my family to stay healthy here.

It sounds like they are:

a) trying to hold you up to her parents standards - which isn't fair, people are different, they have different strengths etc, and
b) waiting for you to fall short?

Tell them you aren't dils parents, and you can only do what you can do.

Remind them too that you are one person, not two, so no one to share care with, or talk to, and never get a chance to have a break,

Thanks for all the suggestions. Based on what I know about past attempts (and being realistic) I think the straight to the point is how it will have to be. I am thinking of giving them 7 weeks notice so in September they might enroll her in something. They actually are about an hour away from anything! That probably is the reason it is so hard for me not to be able to leave. I think that if I could leave with her even for a short outing I would stay however not sure I should bring that up as it could backfire somehow!

Daddima

‘ I’ve decided I can’t look after child any more, so I’ll be giving up on date. That should give you time to make other arrangements’

No explanation necessary.

I absolutely agree !!

To everyone here that gave me the most helpful advice thanks very much. I wanted to let you know how it worked out for me. I told them in writing as they were not listening to me. It was the best way not an email or a text in a letter. I was straight to the point and left no loopholes but gave them plenty of time. I told them the end of September I would not be able to continue with the childcare everyday due to another obligation that left only Fridays open which I would be happy to care for her on that day.
So they did try to coerce (sp) me since they see me there still but I am sticking to my guns and yesterday I saw a brochure for a daycare laying on the kitchen counter so I think it has sunk in.
As to what they did to thank me as some people asked did they treat me to lunch etc. none of those things. I am a diabetic and bring all my own food with me but certainly can eat out however no...they figure they are doing me a favour by allowing so much time with my granddaughter. They will find out soon enough that not everyone will love her like we do and unfortunately she does have some challenging behavoirs that nothing I do stops. She is so frustrated and so I just restrain her by hugging her for a bit. This is not something I dealt with raising my own children so perhaps it will resolve as she gets older. She is very bright but hits her head and anyone around her mostly when tired.
Anyways I am doing it until the end of September and have yet to hear anything more about the Friday I offered. Time will tell. I think that being able to say this in this forum to other grandmother's was most helpful and I appreciate every response and suggestion! Have a wonderful week.

SingleGram - your update is appreciated as some posters never come back to say whether they acted on advice, and if it worked. Interesting that it was a proper letter that had the effect - might be useful to others.

Singlegran, well done.
Just one thought. You have said the end of September. They may need to put the child into nursery in early September in line with the school year, so be prepared for a slightly earlier finish, possibly even a sudden one.