WRONG ANSWERS!!

Because it enjoys running about.

Why do sausages sizzle

Because they spend too long in the sun.

Why do guinea pigs squeak?

Because they can't find a mountaintop to send 'smoke signals'!

Why do cows wave at vehicles passing on the road?

Because they want to hitch a lift over the moon.

Why do horses neigh?

Because the chickens already had the clucking down to a 'T'.

Why is the sea blue?

Because the tide has turned against it.

Why was their only one Monopolies Commission.

The second monopoly could not get noticed!

Why does that conductor prefer a stick to a baton?

It is easier to pick her nose with a stick.


Why do some people prefer tea to coffee?

Because they are on their way to the zoo!

Why are some people unable
to play the kazoo?

Because thy don't have opposable thumbs


Why are mothers in law always right?

Not all are, some are going to vote Labour.

Why do fleas jump?

Because they're learning to parachute so they have to know how to jump out of planes.

What's for dinner?

You! Get back in the oven.


Why is my hair turning grey?

Because grey is a neutral shade and goes with so much, making it easier to plan your outfits each day.

Why have the trees out back grown so quickly since my lovely neighbour trimmed them just a couple of weeks back?

Because lovely neighbor's trimmer is more potent that yours!

Why are all my clocks suddenly running counter clock wise?

Because they are trying to turn back time for you.


Why do children have to go to school?

To learn the rules to 'Simon Says'!

Why does my hyena refuse to laugh?

Because she doesn't find your jokes funny.

Why is football so popular?

Most people just say they like it because their neighbors tell them they're supposed to like it!

Why does my dog pout if I don't put a dab of cologne behind her ear?

Because she's run out of Miss Dior.

Why do you wait ages for a bus and then three come along?

Because one bus got lost and the other two were tasked with the search!

Why do my cookbooks mix up the recipes when I'm cooking to impress my guests?

Because mixed up recipes are more fun than standard ones.

Why won't my car run?

Because you can't see over the steering wheel!

Why are jelly beans always mixed colors when I only want green ones?

Because the Jelly Bears took over the factory.

Who created clowns, and why that awful make-up?

Clowns and their make-up created by Big Shoe & Scaffolding Unlimited Scary Window Cleaners Inc.

When did you last swing on a trapeze and can you still wear your costume?