Limericks (July 23)

Nothing as good as roast dinner
A good roast is always a winner
Spuds fluffy and crisp
(or "crithp"with a lithp)

Nothing as good as roast dinner
A good roast is always a winner
Spuds fluffy and crisp
(or "crithp"with a lithp)
It's just not going to help me get thinner!

I once found a mouse in a box

I once found a mouse in a box
He was snuggled inside some old socks

I once found a mouse in a box
He was snuggled inside some old socks
He refused to budge

I once found a mouse in a box
He was snuggled inside some old socks
He refused to budge
Even enticed him with fudge

I once found a mouse in a box
He was snuggled inside some old socks
He refused to budge
Enticed him with fudge
He ran off and was ate by a fox.

The fox then became very ill

The fox then became very ill
He said "I'll just keep so, so still

The fox then became very ill
He said "I'll just keep so, so still
The vet saved his life

The fox then became very ill
He said "I'll just keep so, so still
The vet saved his life
Even found him a wife

The fox then became very ill
He said "I'll just keep so, so still
The vet saved his life
Even found him a wife
They then had a son called Bill.

Sadly the vet's fee was greedy

Sadly the vet's fee was greedy
Even well paid can be needy

Sadly the vet's fee was greedy
Even well paid can be needy
Meanwhile, how is the mouse?

Sadly the vet's fee was greedy
Even well paid can be needy
Meanwhile, how’s the mouse?
He’s got his own house

Sadly the vet's fee was greedy
Even well paid can be needy
Meanwhile, how’s the mouse?
He’s got his own house
This is sounding rather seedy

Aunt Edith loved her animals

Aunt Edith loved her animals
Her dog could sniff out criminals

Aunt Edith loved her animals
Her dog could sniff out criminals.
The cat was the boss

Aunt Edith loved her animals
Her dog could sniff out criminals.
The cat was the boss
The rabbit was cross

Aunt Edith loved her animals
Her dog could sniff out criminals.
The cat was the boss
The rabbit was cross
When for food he got minimals

The country’s hoping for a change

The country’s hoping for a change
I think a change would be strange

The country's hoping for a change
I think a change would be strange
Maybe much better

The country's hoping for a change
I think a change would be strange
Maybe much better
Dream on, Henrietta

The country's hoping for a change
I think a change would be strange
Maybe much better
Dream on, Henrietta
At least my dog hasn’t got mange

My Vet, he’s got sticky fingers

My Vet, he’s got sticky fingers
On his hands my cat’s fur lingers

My Vet, he’s got sticky fingers
On his hands my cat’s fur lingers
Where has his hand been?

My Vet, he’s got sticky fingers
On his hands my cat’s fur lingers
Where has his hand been?
It's not very clean