Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway)

The back half wanted a big drink
It so didn't feel in the pink
We gave it some whisky

The back half wanted a big drink
It so didn't feel in the pink
We gave it some whisky
It became quite frisky

The back half wanted a big drink
It so didn't feel in the pink
We gave it some whisky
It became quite frisky
And really made the front half think

I don't know what's happening here

What if we all dressed that way?
We’ll save lots of money, I say
But I’d miss my jeans
I've worn since my teens
So kiltless I think I will stay

Formal attire is fun

I don't know where that came from, GL

I don't know what's happening here
Let's open a barrel of beer

I don't know what's happening here
Let's open a barrel of beer
We'll sup it and sing

I don't know what's happening here
Let's open a barrel of beer
We'll sup it and sing
The dance in a ring

I don't know what's happening here
Let's open a barrel of beer
We'll sup it and sing
Then dance in a ring
And look forward to Christmas this year

I met an old flame in the park

I met an old flame in the park
He lit up my heart in the dark

I met an old flame in the park
He lit up my heart in the dark
The street lights came on

The street lights came on & we’ll be able to sing and dance like anything for quite a while longer too

I met an old flame in the park
He lit up my heart in the dark
The street lights came on
Sang and danced till dawn

I met an old flame in the park
He lit up my heart in the dark
The street lights came on
Sang and danced till dawn
And made all the local dogs bark

I quite like to watch the sun rise

I quite like to watch the sun rise
Watching the pink and golden skies

I quite like to watch the sun rise
Watching the pink and golden skies
We'll sit on a bench

I quite like to watch the sun rise
Watching the pink and golden skies
We'll sit on a bench
And kiss like the French

I quite like to watch the sun rise
Watching the pink and golden skies
We'll sit on a bench
And kiss like the French
Time now to open my eyes

Minerva loved dancing the waltz

Minerva loved dancing the waltz
Even though there were lots of faults

Minerva loved dancing the waltz
Even though there were lots of faults
It wasn't too dainty

Minerva loved dancing the waltz
Even though there were lots of faults
It wasn't too dainty
Stan's great though, ain't he?

Minerva loved dancing the waltz
Even though there were lots of faults
It wasn't too dainty
Stan's great though, ain't he
He sure isn't one of the dolts

I think it's the tango for me

I think it's the tango for me
As I twirl most elegantly

I think it's the tango for me
As I twirl most elegantly
My Argentine heels

I think it's the tango for me
As I twirl most elegantly
My Argentine heels
Feels like I’m on wheels

I think it's the tango for me
As I twirl most elegantly
My Argentine heels
Feels like I’m on wheels
But alas, then I fell on my knee

They clapped as I limped off the floor