Limericks with very strict rules (6) - 88558

Tom tried to learn the violin
Before he flew to the Kremlin
Learned balalaika
Made of formica
The Red Army beckoning him

A domra is a kind of lute

Tom tried to learn the violin
Before he flew to the Kremlin
Learned balalaika
Made of formica
He said “this is doing my head in”

He gathered his Rubles and left

He gathered his Rubles and left
He'd been wrongly accused of theft

He gathered his Rubles and left
He'd been wrongly accused of theft
I’ll not return here

He gathered his Rubles and left
He'd been wrongly accused of theft
I’ll not return here
But in Russia, oh dear!

He gathered his Rubles and left
He’d been wrongly accused of theft
I’ll not return here
Not even for beer

Sorry! Typed by mistake

He gathered his Rubles and left
He’d been wrongly accused of theft
I’ll not return here
Not even for beer
I certainly won’t be bereft.

Their Vodka is one thing I’ll miss

He gathered his Rubles and left
He’d been wrongly accused of theft
I’ll not return here
Not even for beer
I certainly won’t be bereft.

Their Vodka is one thing I’ll miss

Their vodka is one thing I`ll miss
The taste of it really is bliss

Their vodka is one thing I`ll miss
The taste of it really is bliss
But, as it's risky

Their vodka is one thing I`ll miss
The taste of it really is bliss
But, as it's risky
Makes me so frisky

Their vodka is one thing I`ll miss
The taste of it really is bliss
But, as it's risky
Makes me so frisky
From now on it's something I'll diss.

I'm going to give new gins a go

I'm going to give new gins a go
They're best when sipped very slow

I'm going to give new gins a go
They're best when sipped very slow
A splash of tonic

I'm going to give new gins a go
They're best when sipped very slow
A splash of tonic
A pair harmonic

I`m going to give new gins a go
They`re best when sipped very slow
A splash of tonic
A pair harmonic
We`ll always put on a good show

They`ll be talking of us for years

They`ll be talking of us for years
Some stories may bring on the tears

They'll be talking of us for years
Some stories may bring on the tears
Ah, there's always one

They`ll be talking of us for years
Some stories may bring on the tears
Ah, there`s always one
Who is so far gone

They`ll be talking of us for years
Some stories may bring on the tears
Ah, there`s always one
Who is so far gone
He can't tell his gins from his beers.

Let's tell some incredible stories

Let's tell some incredible stories
Of the time i drove large lorries

Let's tell some incredible stories
Of the time i drove large lorries
All over the place

Let's tell some incredible stories
Of the time i drove large lorries
All over the place
We enjoyed the race

Let's tell some incredible stories
Of the time i drove large lorries
All over the place
We enjoyed the race
Between the Whigs and the Tories.

Halloween will be coming soon