Limericks 14

No more then demon drink he`d touch
He realised he had had too much
With good intentions in place
He left the rat race

No more the demon drink he'd touch
He realised he had had too much
With good intentions in place
He left the rat race
He no longer used booze as a crutch.

Young Shazza was so keen on rap

Young Shazza was so keen on rap
Went to the Bronx, with his flat-cap

Young Shazza was so keen on rap
Went to the Bronx, with his flat-cap
Got in with some dudes

Young Shazza was so keen on rap
Went to the Bronx, with his flat cap
Got in with some dudes
Were they in some moods!

Young Shazza was so keen on rap
Went to the Bronx, with his flat cap
Got in with some dudes
Were they in some moods!
He got into an awful flap.

He changed his cap back to front

He changed his cap back to front
And tried a ridiculous stunt

He changed his cap back to front
And tried a ridiculous stunt
His break dance backfired

He changed his cap back to front
And tried a ridiculous stunt
His break dance backfired
His joints, old and tired

He changed his cap back to front
And tried a ridiculous stunt
His break dance backfired
His joints, old and tired
Were too fragile to take the brunt

He was taken to A&E

He was taken to A&E
The nurse said “take a seat, we’ll see”

He was taken to A&E
The nurse said "take a seat, we`ll see"
You`ve not broken bones

He was taken to A&E
The nurse said "take a seat, we`ll see"
You`ve not broken bones
Tripped on traffic cones?

He was taken to A&E
The nurse said "take a seat, we`ll see"
You`ve not broken bones
Tripped on traffic cones?
It's just a boil on your knee

You're a lucky young man she said

You're a lucky young man she said
Just have a few days in your bed

You're a lucky young man she said
Just have a few days in your bed
In no time at all

You're a lucky young man she said
Just have a few days in your bed
In no time at all
Be back on the ball

You're a lucky young man she said
Just have a few days in your bed
In no time at all
Be back on the ball
Oh dear me, was his face red!

But he wants to be down with the kids

But he wants to be down with the kids
Jump on a skateboard and bang bin lids

But he wants to be down with the kids
Jump on a skateboard and bang bin lids
Making all the moves

But he wants to be down with the kids
Jump on a skateboard and bang bin lids
Making all the moves
Dancing on the roofs

But he wants to be down with the kids
Jump on a skateboard and bang bin lids
Making all the moves
Dancing on the roofs
And now he's almost on the skids.

There once was a parrot named Jane

There once was a parrot named Jane
Who mastered a naughty refrain

There once was a parrot named Jane
Who mastered a naughty refrain
"Eff Off" she shouted

There once was a parrot named Jane
Who mastered a naughty refrain
"Eff Off" she shouted
Where learnt not doubted