VERSATILE VERSE 3

I'm far more likely to end up sued instead
Then my bank statement will be totally red

Perhaps I should try my skills out on my friends

They say the ladies there, tip very well
but there's no way my hairdressing skills are going to sell

I'm far more likely to end up sued instead

Maybe after the virus a new career starting
Could probably open a salon in Barking.

They say the ladies there, tip very well

So practice your skills and you’ll be surprised
Your efforts at coiffure will not be despised

Maybe after the virus a new career starting

Of what you’d spend in a fancy hairdressing salon
They charge the earth and then it's all gone.

So practise your skills and you'll be surprised

You must try a patch test in case of reaction,
DIY at home, the cost will be a fraction

Of what you’d spend in a fancy hairdressing salon

I need to try a home colour to revitalise the grey,
Or really good dye that will hide it away.

You must try a patch test in case of reaction,

shorter on one side, fringe all askew
trying this out I certainly rue

I need to try a home colour to revitalize the grey

I long for my hairdresser to work her magic.
Tried it myself and the outcome was tragic.

Shorter on one side, fringe all askew

It's long and dry, and brittle too
It looks like a brush you'd use for the loo!

I long for my hairdresser to perform her magic

But I would feel tickled pink to be there
A special effort is needed for my hair.

It’s long and dry, and brittle too

It could be performed at the Albert Hall
I'll stand on a box as I'm not very tall.

But I would feel tickled pink to be there

I'd love a No 1 in the Classical Charts
something cheering which would reach our hearts

It could be performed at the Albert Hall

I think I’ll compose a cantata for flute
Then off to the recording studio I’ll shoot

I’d love a No 1 in the Classical Charts

I’m going to spend time writing a book.

Well publish the title here, I’ll have a look.

I think I’ll compose a cantata for flute

What else shall I do to improve the New Year
I feel optimistic; last year was a 'mare

I going to spend time writing a book

(No idea where 39 came from. Not part of the verse)

I’ll drink lots of water and lay off the wine,
And soon have a figure that’s really divine.

What else shall I do to improve the New Year? 39

The popular sea-food one, that's the best diet,
It works for me so I recommend that you try it

I'll drink lots of water and lay off the wine

Let’s eat lettuce instead of cream filled buns
But please, not too much, ‘cos it gives me the runs!

The popular sea-food one, that’s the best diet,

I still have the figure to be The Buxom Wench!
So go on a diet, - I know it's a wrench.

Let's eat lettuce instead of cream filled buns

It looks like I'll need a new wardrobe of clothes
Except for Fancy Dress - won’t get rid of those

I still have the figure to be The Buxom Wench!

My zips are giving way, my buttons undone
but all of the indulgence has been fun

It looks like I'll need a new wardrobe of clothes

How many calories are in that I wonder?
What about the cheesecake I’m about to devour?

My zips are giving way, my buttons undone

Do you think you'll get your just 'desserts'?
Covered in cream which came out with a squirt

How many calories are in that I wonder?