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Limericks 11

(1001 Posts)
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Juliet27 Tue 22-Oct-19 06:58:01

Continuing from 9

I was tempted to conjure a spell
Leave the house with a horrible smell

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Quesera Sun 27-Oct-19 10:43:16

Young Guido of York took the rap
His discovery in the cellar a mishap
Now four hundred years on
His memory lives on

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Juliet27 Sun 27-Oct-19 11:42:28

Young Guido of York took the rap
His discovery in the cellar a mishap
Now four hundred years on
His memory lives on
And each year we stage a recap

The sun's appeared - I'm going out!

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Quesera Sun 27-Oct-19 16:15:16

The sun's appeared - I'm going out!
In hot pants and crop top I’ll lark about!

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Bellanonna Sun 27-Oct-19 16:25:16

The sun's appeared - I'm going out!
In hot pants and crop top I’ll lark about!
But, you know, it’s quite cold

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Juliet27 Sun 27-Oct-19 17:19:14

The sun's appeared - I'm going out!
In hot pants and crop top I’ll lark about!
But, you know, it’s quite cold
And I’m far too old

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WOODMOUSE49 Sun 27-Oct-19 20:49:42

The sun's appeared - I'm going out!
In hot pants and crop top I’ll lark about!
But, you know, it’s quite cold
And I’m far too old
So it's scarf and gloves no doubt

It's fish and chips for us tonight

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callgirl1 Sun 27-Oct-19 21:16:24

It`s fish and chips for us tonight
It`s cold, so a fry up will go down alright,

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Barberdice Sun 27-Oct-19 22:36:55

It's fish and chips for us tonight
It's cold, so a fry up will go down alright,
To hell with the diet

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crazyH Sun 27-Oct-19 22:46:24

It's fish and chips for us tonight
It's cold, so a fry up will go down alright,
To hell with the diet
Gonna have a riot

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callgirl1 Sun 27-Oct-19 22:52:00

It`s fish and chips for us tonight
It`s cold, so a fry up will go down alright,
To hell with the diet
Gonna have a riot
I always did like a good fight!

Does anyone know some first aid?

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FarNorth Mon 28-Oct-19 08:24:59

Does anyone know some first aid?
I can teach you to polka, as trade

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BradfordLass72 Mon 28-Oct-19 08:42:42

Does anyone know some first aid?
I can teach you to polka, as trade
That won't help my cut finger!

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crazyH Mon 28-Oct-19 09:17:52

Does anyone know some first aid?
I can teach you to polka, as trade
That won't help my cut finger!
I can't afford to linger

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Quesera Mon 28-Oct-19 09:20:56

Does anyone know some first aid?
I can teach you to polka, as trade
That won't help my cut finger!
It’s still dripping, can’t linger!

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Juliet27 Mon 28-Oct-19 10:26:36

Does anyone know some first aid?
I can teach you to polka, as trade
That won't help my cut finger!
It’s still dripping, can’t linger!
I shall lose this digit I’m afraid.

I’m off to a new friend’s for coffee

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crazyH Mon 28-Oct-19 10:33:09

I'm off to a new friend’s for coffee
I hope there's no cake with toffee

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Quesera Mon 28-Oct-19 11:11:53

I'm off to a new friend’s for coffee
I hope there's no cake with toffee
Or chocolate or fudge

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crazyH Mon 28-Oct-19 11:21:01

I'm off to a new friend’s for coffee
I hope there's no cake with toffee
Or chocolate or fudge
My layers wont budge

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Juliet27 Mon 28-Oct-19 15:21:47

I'm off to a new friend’s for coffee
I hope there's no cake with toffee
Or chocolate or fudge
My layers wont budge
No, she made a great big banoffee!

I’ve already put on some winter weight ?

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Granniesunite Mon 28-Oct-19 15:34:19

Dear lord I must use a small plate

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Granniesunite Mon 28-Oct-19 15:35:05

Sorry

I’ve already put on some weight
Dear lord I must use a small plate

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Jangran99 Mon 28-Oct-19 16:06:35

I’ve already put on some weight
Dear lord I must use a small plate
My jeans are restricting

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WOODMOUSE49 Mon 28-Oct-19 16:40:21

I’ve already put on some weight
Dear lord I must use a small plate
My jeans are restricting
The seams are splitting

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Juliet27 Mon 28-Oct-19 19:28:40

I’ve already put on some weight
Dear lord I must use a small plate
My jeans are restricting
The seams are splitting
I’m certainly not looking great.

A university student from Keele

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callgirl1 Mon 28-Oct-19 21:12:48

A university student from Keele
Went out for a Christmas Eve meal,

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