Limericks 8

I bought a new car, very sporty,
I`ve wanted one since I was forty

I bought a new car, very sporty,
I`ve wanted one since I was forty
When that roof comes down

I bought a new car, very sporty,
I`ve wanted one since I was forty
When that roof comes down
Like a bird I'd have flown

I bought a new car, very sporty,
I`ve wanted one since I was forty
When that roof comes down
Like a bird I'd have flown
And the speedo shows I'm being very naughty!

I once fell in love with a mountaineer

I once fell in love with a mountaineer
We climbed together, we had all the gear

I once fell in love with a mountaineer
We climbed together, we had all the gear
But one day on a ledge

I once fell in love with a mountaineer
We climbed together, we had all the gear
But one day on a ledge
I made a solemn pledge

I once fell in love with a mountaineer
We climbed together, we had all the gear
But one day on a ledge
I made a solemn pledge
To just lie on a beach next year

D'you understand this game they call cricket

I once fell in love with a mountaineer
We climbed together, we had all the gear
But one day on a ledge
I made a solemn pledge
Never to climb again as I was frozen with fear!

From now on my feet are on firm ground

D'you understand this game they call cricket
It's something to do with leg before wicket

D'you understand this game they call cricket
It's something to do with leg before wicket
But bowling maidens over?

D'you understand this game they call cricket
It's something to do with leg before wicket
But bowling maidens over?
Puts the bowlers in clover

D'you understand this game they call cricket?
It's something to do with leg before wicket
But bowling maidens over?
Puts the bowlers in clover
But crumbs, have you seen the price of a ticket?

You could go to a match in fancy dress

You could go to a match in fancy dress
What you'd choose, I couldn't guess

You could go to a match in fancy dress
What you'd choose, I couldn't guess
Perhaps Sporty Spice or Mrs Brown?

You could go to a match in fancy dress
What you'd choose I couldn't guess
Perhaps Sporty Spice or Mrs Brown?
You can find something in town

You could go to a match in fancy dress
What you'd choose I couldn't guess
Perhaps Sporty Spice or Mrs Brown?
You can find something in town
Whatever it is, I'm out to impress.

Do you remember your first date?

Do you remember your first date?
I was so excited I thought I'd faint

Do you remember your first date?
When your prospective suitor turned up late,

Do you remember your first date?
When your prospective suitor turned up late
In his gleamy white MG roadster

Do you remember your first date?
When your prospective suitor turned up late
In his gleamy white MG roadster
Said he`d got his finger stuck in the toaster,

Do you remember your fist date?
When your prospective suitor turned up late
In his gleamy white MG roadster
Said he'd got his finger stuck in the toaster
But sadly he wasn't worth the wait.

He thought he was a swaggering playboy

He thought he was a swaggering playboy
Everything about him was bound to annoy

He thought he was a swaggering playboy
Everything about him was bound to annoy
With his fake gold Rolex

He thought he was a swaggering playboy
Everything about him was bound to annoy
With his fake gold Rolex
His penchant for Spandex