LIMERICKS 4

So I'll travel by buses instead
Guaranteed that I’ll now get ahead
Until a puncture delays
Oh no! it's one of those days
I have completely lost my street cred

Perhaps the day is right for a walk

Perhaps the day is right for a walk
Nice to wander along while we talk

So I'll travel by buses instead
Guaranteed that I'll now get ahead
Until a puncture delays
Oh no! it's one of those days
The driver says the engine is dead!

Maybe I'll learn to ride a bike

Oops sorry forgot to turn page

Perhaps the day is right for a walk
Nice to wander along while we talk
We can whistle and hum

Perhaps the day is right for a walk
Nice to wander along while we talk
We can whistle and hum
Enjoy our green kingdom

Perhaps the day is right for a walk
Nice to wander along while we talk
We can whistle and hum
Enjoy our green kingdom,
Hoping to see a heron or hawk.

Birdwatching is a daily delight

Birdwatching is a daily delight
What joy when the youngsters take flight

Birdwatching is a daily delight
What joy when the youngsters take flight
Enjoying life in the free

Birdwatching is a daily delight
What joy when the youngsters take flight
Enjoying life in the free
Flying from tree to tree

Birdwatching is a daily delight
What joy when the youngsters take flight
Enjoying life in the free
Flying from tree to tree
Is ever a most heart-warming sight.

There was a young woman from Gollup

There was a young woman from Gollup
Who was know as a bit of a trollop!!!

There was a young woman from Gollup
Who was know as a bit of a trollop!!!
Her nights turned into days

There was a young woman from Gollup
Who was know as a bit of a trollop!!!
Her nights turned into days
With a client who pays

There was a young woman from Gollup
Who was know as a bit of a trollop!!!
Her nights turned into days
With a client who pays
And caviar served by the dollop

The gossip was fierce and frenetic

The gossip was fierce and frenetic
Some rumours verged on emetic

The gossip was fierce and frenetic
Some rumours verged on emetic
Were the pictures photoshopped I did wonder?

The gossip was fierce and frenetic
Some rumours verged on emetic
Were the pictures photoshopped I did wonder
Thus stealing my thunder

The gossip was fierce and frenetic
Some rumours verged on emetic
Were the pictures photoshopped I did wonder
Thus stealing my thunder
But alas it was all lies, how pathetic!

My wig fell of in a chip shop in Greece!

My wig fell of in a chip shop in Greece!
A tragedy for my own golden fleece

My wig fell of in a chip shop in Greece!
A tragedy for my own golden fleece
It lay there on the floor

My wig fell of in a chip shop in Greece!
A tragedy for my own golden fleece
It lay there on the floor
I'll wear it no more

My wig fell of in a chip shop in Greece!
A tragedy for my own golden fleece
It lay there on the floor
I'll wear it no more
The joys of living may they increase

There once was a Scotman with a beard

There once was a Scotman with a beard
That reached to his navel - so weird!

There once was a Scotman with a beard
That reached to his navel - so weird!
Five birds nested within