Am I wrong to feel hurt about this?

I have laughed alot with thread

Every Christmas I'd give a friend a tin of shortbread which was gratefully received. Then one year she rang to say she'd opened the tin to find some pieces missing and telltale crumbs. DH had got there first! I still cringe at the memory.

To save all this, both my good friends and myself agreed, no gifts just a nice card. Is working well, and less of a hassle as to what to buy. Not the same, maybe, but it suits us.

My DiL made me laugh giving me my Christmas present. I opened it to find massive pjs four sizes bigger than my size. She said I think it's easier to wear them too big. You don't want tight pjs do you then she said I got them in the sale. I got them for all my female relatives they only had that size. I couldn't take offence she's lovely!

EllanVannin

Give her the tea bags back,hahahahaha.

Yes, I was going to suggest that too, pretending you misunderstood which gift she wanted back.

If the other gift she wants back (how odd!) is edible or toiletries just say you used them already.

Or say you re-gifted it to someone ?

I hope you're not my friend - I gave her tea but I can assure you her that it was brand new, recently purchased!

Is it 2023?

Georgesgran I once bought DD a bottle of her favourite perfume from the duty free.
When I gave it to her she was quiet for a bit then laughed and said it was the men's version - her boyfriend was very pleased.

How was I to know they did a men's version ?

My MIL once gave me a nightdress, DH admired the pattern , on inspection they were footprints it must have slipped off the hanger in M&S and someone had walked over it with muddy boots.
She gave me what only could be called puce cami knickers when I told SIL she said she had got the same in bottle green and the step DIL the same in mustard. Must have been a job lot three for two in awful colours.
My SIL was nearly as bad herself the daughters and myself often got the three for two summer offers on Boots toiletries still with the sticker when she knew we were all allergic to lanolin and harsh shower gel. Also 3 for 2 paperbacks from Asda still with a sticker.
The worst pressie ever [I was a teacher we got all sorts and loved them ] having a share buffet, one mother heard and sent me a tin of homemade buns. The buttercream was violently coloured and there sticking to one bun was black pubic hair, her hair was blonde it must have been her husbands!!!

An in-law gave me a tin of shortbread in a hideous ‘Kittens with tartan ribbons’ tin. I like shortbread, but this had obviously been opened and the ‘Use By’ date badly scratched off. I laughed, but I’d honestly have preferred no present at all.

I've had a mouldy Christmas cake in a tin. I did a favour for a friend of my mothers and she gave me it as a thank you. Use by date 10 years previous!!!.

My mother in law Bless her had loads of grandchildren and used to buy bits and pieces at jumble sales during the year One year my eldest got a plastic rain Mac I was trying to be positive to over rule her disappointment but as we opened it there was a big hole in the lower front and i mean BIG the size of a dinner plate I think I bought her a new cindy to make up for it

I'd have a good laugh about it - rather than feel hurt. She made a mistake, but so what? The gifts are just tokens, the friendship important.

Everyone knows that I have severe allergies. Still, I've received flowers (can't have them in the house), perfumed items (charity shop) - and many chocolates that I can't eat (I'm vegan, so give them to others).

In the past, I've stored unwanted things in the garage to re-gift. One year, I accidentally gave an unusual item back to the person who'd given it to me (as the post-it notes fell off).

Oh dear, rumbled, we really laughed at the time. Nowadays, we've all agreed not to do presents. Instead, we buy ourselves what we really want, much better.

I am feeling a bit fed up today. I was looking at the gift my DS bought me. We are extremely close, tell each other everything and I always go out of my way to buy her something thoughtful and actually more expensive than I spend on anyone else. So it is a trinket tray, of the umbrella in Mary Poppins. Its lovely and quirky. So I decided to look up the website to see what other stuff they do. I am so sad to see my gift only cost her £6. I am in total shock, it just feels like a last-minute thing, and I thought she would give me something more meaningful. I know that sounds like I think more money should have been spent, but I don't, just that maybe more time and effort would have been made. I am totally gob-smacked, and apart from what I have said here, I don't know how to really deal with this. Any suggestions?

Bridget if you think the gift is lovely, don't worry about the cost.
I'm sure your DS thought it was lovely too and bought it because she thought you'd like it.

You thought it was lovely and quirky, and it sounds as though you liked it until you saw the price. Maybe your sister bought it because she thought it was lovely and quirky and you would like it. It’s the thought that counts, after all, so try to focus on that.

My DB and SisIL once gave me a lovely silky camisole for Christmas. I was delighted until I realized it was a size 16 and I was a size 12. I decided to return it to M&S and say nothing to them except thank you, and get something the right size. When I took it back they couldn't get a price for it when scanned. It turned out it must have been more than 3 years old - M&S gave me £1 for it! It's funny now but I had to wonder how long it had been circulating as a gift and why they didn't even realize it was 2 sizes too big ?

A friend of mine was telling me once about an awful book she had been given for Christmas, completely forgetting that she had re gifted it to me. That might explain some of the truly weird presents I have had from her over the years.
A few years back we agreed no more presents much happier all round.

Why don’t you decide to just send cards.

Allsorts, thankyou, I have decided that is what I will do. I don't want to prolong any feelings of hurt, as we lean on each other so so much. But yes, it will be simpler to cut out the present giving and just do cards, Thankyou all for your thoughts, it has really helped.xxx

Thank you all for the tales of some truly terrible presents! They've given me a giggle! I have binned the tea, as it smelled really fusty, but will see if the little wooden box it was in is useful for something. Unfortunately she was specific about the gift she wants back so I can't hand the tea back, which was a box from a well known high street gift shop chain which ceased trading many years ago - the box was bottom up showing the label when I unwrapped it, which is why I moticed it. I'll just consign this episode to history without saying anything to her and suggest we just do coffee and a mince pie or lunch out somewhere instead for future Christmases, to save us both a bit of time and money.
Anyway, a big thumbs up to everyone for the Christmas chuckles!

Aveline

A dear elderly friend sent a Christmas card with a note saying, 'Please give the children £10 each.' Fair enough, but no cheque was enclosed!

?
Bet you just had to laugh though.

These posts made me laugh, some truly awful presents.
I think you are right Growingold just laugh off the incident and the suggestion of coffee and a mince pie is a good alternative.

I think re -gifting has been around for a long time, there is a short story ( may be by Dickens or Twain) called The Smoking Jacket ( if memory serves me well, which it may not) all about a ‘smoking set’ comprising of velvet jacket, hat and pipe which is constantly given as a present to somebody else, it’s very funny.

My SiL one year gave me the free gift of miniatures in a zip bag that you got when you purchased a certain number of No 7 products. I knrw because I already had it.
My best friend gave me two sake bowls and saucers this year identical to the ones she gave me about 5 years ago which I gave to the charity shop. They aren't on sale now. Must have got a good reduced price on them. I love her. She's a great friend. I just thanked her.

I regift presents but I write on a sticker who gave me it.

I know some people who regift things, especially books. I put a small black dot somewhere on the copyright page, and have received a number of my dotted books back as gifts to me. I have dropped subtle hints, so they know I know.