Home alone this Christmas

For me it is too early to think about the C word. I will be on my own and for me, it is just another day.

I have never spent christmas alone but I have had some horrendous ones in the past with the ex husbands family. We used to get to their house around 11am and back home by 6pm, with huge sighs of relief from me and the kids. The best christmases were the ones spent with me, my youngest son, my mam and my eldest son.

If I was on my own then I would have ham, egg and chips or cheese and tomato sandwiches while sitting on a warm beach!

I agree that its great to have a choice but relatives think you are being " odd " or unfriendly and I don't know why they can't leave you alone to decide about your own life. When the kids were small I did all the Family things but now in my 80's I love being on my own ..without tripping over plastic toys, barking dogs, cats climbing all over you, a meal which is luke warm as we all had to search for the Xmas Crackers, wailing babies .. We have done all that and now I need a nice quiet place to enjoy a delicious meal and watch my TV .. and a trip to a Quakers meeting ...

It seems to be an unwritten law in the U.K., that however happy someone may be to spend the C-word day on their own, they will have to fend off well-meaning friends/relatives who are aghast at the very idea, and insist that it can’t possibly be allowed.

Old thread?

Which is when we remind others to put the sprouts on.
You should get advice from professionals which we are not.
Also sounds as if you are in America.

Not sure you will find what you want to know here.
We do try not to mention the C word before at least October too! ?

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Some people can't accept that you want to be on your own on Xmas Day it's not always a happy, joyous day for some people particularly if your Dh/partner/etc has passed away during the year. It's a painful reminder of what you've lost and how the day will never be the same again.

In the early days (for me) I used to avoid all conversation about Christmas and what I was doing on the day because if I said I was spending it on my own then people seem to think they must invite you, and to be perfectly honest, I had a couple of horrible days because I was stuck with people I didn't know who were all drinking too much and it was not my idea of fun.

One of these times I waited until after lunch and slipped out to my car and left without anyone even noticing, then spent a quiet night at home, which was much more enjoyable...but of course, you can't be rude to a host and later I just said I was getting a migraine (which I suffered from anyway), she didn't know I had left anyway.

During my childhood Christmas was always a time for family arguments that lingered for months, so it's a reminder of how 'not' to behave on the day.

Sorry Nexus.

Hope next year is better for you Nexia ?

i spent christmas on my own as i lost my partner back in may, i was invited to my sons and my mums(she lost her husband this year) but i wanted to be on my own, i love my own company, 18 years with my partner and we had our own houses. due to an emergency i only came home from hospital at 5pm christmas eve, my son had got me a small shop and it was fine, toasted cheese for lunch and nibbles for later. it is just another day to me but i do understand some people missing family and i can really understand that some people want to shut the door and be left alone to enjoy there own company, i don't need or want pity or others feeling sorry for me because i am on my own on the 25th dec the same as i will be on any other day.

geekesse, I understand that, completely. I dread the knocks on the door, to see if I am allright, gosh I am the active one here, just different in mid winter when I hibernate and love my own company. All that stuff on certain channels about calling on an older person, yes grhhh I know it is meant kindly but I am old school with a good storecupboard and have survived many bad winters. It is not a novelty for someone like me, just a different season, hibernating, knitting, cooked meals, tv. Tbh it is a blissful time and I don`t want to answer the door

I have Christmas on my own most years, and I love it. Smoked salmon and champagne in the fridge, a tin of Quality Street and a box set to watch between the TV programmes I like.

The only problem is fending off all the friends who, trying to be kind, see me as their Christmas ‘charity case’, and press me to join their families. I thought I’d managed to turn everyone down nicely, but then my neighbour turned up with a plateful of Christmas dinner! I know they are all trying to be nice, but I do so wish they would let me chill out in peace.

We have a big family bash at Epiphany - presents, a meal, all the grandchildren playing hide-and-seek round the house. I’m not missing out on anything, I just choose to do Christmas differently. Why can’t people understand that?

And I loved it too! For a change I didn't do anything, oh except press the start button on the dishwasher and put them away later...but that's not work.

Yes I was... loved it.