Ruler Of The World (lighthearted)

Cossy Brilliant! I totally agree with all your choices.

Shysal, I agree with you completely. That would make everything else come right.

I'd ban dogs from beaches and town centres and parks and everywhere else that they irritate me. Actually I'd ban dogs full stop (ok, except for assistance dogs) but I know that would probably get me banned from Gransnet.

I'd ban anyone making poor quality copies of Cornish pasties. How very dare they!

Also I'd ban ageing.

Sorry about the typo.

And on reflexion, I might have slightly overlooked your "lighthearted" intention, Cossy, as I genuinely would like to put the brakes on this sector!!! 😊

I think I would ban almost all avances in computer technology that have taken place since about 2010.

Going further 'just because we can' isn't necessarily a good thing on any level, from personal to global. In fact, quite the opposite!

And all showers would work the same way, so I need never get scalded/frozen in one again.

I agree with lots of these. I’d add that all TV’s, cars and tech should operate in the same way, so you didn’t have to remember exactly how each item worked. We’ll have the same plugs & sockets all round the world, while I’m at it. And tablets that pop instantly out of their packaging, instead of needing to wield a knife and ending up with slash injuries on your hand while trying to liberate them.

@Gracie. You get my vote!

I would degree that iced doughnuts would henceforth contain no calories.
That half the population of the world were sent to colonise another planet.
That every town and city centre contained a beautiful sculpture and fountain ( as in other European countries)
Plus plentiful benches.
That dog owners and their pooches must only sit outside pubs cafes and restaurants.Living dangerously on here now aren’t I?😁

I would ban hands free mobile phones. I really hate having to listen to everyone else's conversations.
Im wearing a tin hat to say I'd also ban artificial grass. Looks dreadful in my opinion.

I would banish Putin to desolate Siberia.

I would ban Elvis impersonators. Some fat bloke thinks if he puts on a white jump suit, a black wig and some comedy black sideburns and suddenly he looks like Elvis? I think not! Let's see you try and impersonate him in his prime! Honestly, hangings too good for them!

Too late. The buffoon has claimed the title.

Galaxy

We better not be in charge foxie, we would end up in a cycle of banning. We are probably secret authoritarians.

If I was going to be "Ruler of the world" I'd need to be an obvious authoritarian or no one would do as I said, so it's very unlikely I'd succeed in getting anything banned.

Other than political things, I would ban whingeing about how bad things are in the UK, and I’d ban idiots who drive massive high vehicles with main beam on from driving anything bigger or more upmarket than a Fiat Panda. I would also impose a ban on all spiders and flying insects coming into peoples homes.

This has instantly brought to memory Harry Seacombe’s If I Ruled the World, which if I were ruler would have me waving my wand and hoping that the lyrics would come true, banishing all that’s scary along with all the annoyances too

Finally I’d make non-alcoholic wine taste nice!

I agree with this! Some are truly awful... 😑

However I have to say that as a family we find Kylie Minogue's alcohol-free sparkling rosé, well chilled, quite acceptable 🥂

I order from Tesco but I imagine other supermarkets stock it as well.

BAN CHRISTMAS Grannybags. How could you!!!!

I graciously assent Cossy

Oreo

I would decree that only well made clothes were offered for sale.
That only flags of the British Isles should be flown here.
That all Turkish barber shops / vape shops / Vietnamese nail bars and any other place that’s an obvious money laundering outfit be closed down forthwith.
That dark Bounty bars be brought back.
That Police and nursing Colleges be re-instated.
That all fun sized ( disappointingly tiny) chocolate bars vanish from the shelves.
That any shop assistant suffers a small taser shock if they say ‘ we don’t stock it there’s no call for it’ or fail to acknowledge the presence of a customer in any way.😁
I would also fine heavily those who snatch a parking space while you are obviously there first but they push in.
That’ll do for starters.

Oh and Teacher Training College too please.

I would ban all wind and rainstorms that cause severe flooding and electricity cut outs.
Pavement parkers who cause people especially mums with prams and wheelchair users to go into the road to get passed should have their cars impounded permanently.

I would make sure that everyone would have access to clean drinking water and free health care. Would also make kindness, politeness, and gentleness part of the educational curriculum.

I'd make snow warm and rain dry.

I would decree that only well made clothes were offered for sale.
That only flags of the British Isles should be flown here.
That all Turkish barber shops / vape shops / Vietnamese nail bars and any other place that’s an obvious money laundering outfit be closed down forthwith.
That dark Bounty bars be brought back.
That Police and nursing Colleges be re-instated.
That all fun sized ( disappointingly tiny) chocolate bars vanish from the shelves.
That any shop assistant suffers a small taser shock if they say ‘ we don’t stock it there’s no call for it’ or fail to acknowledge the presence of a customer in any way.😁
I would also fine heavily those who snatch a parking space while you are obviously there first but they push in.
That’ll do for starters.

We better not be in charge foxie, we would end up in a cycle of banning. We are probably secret authoritarians.