Can’t settle

I'm like this too, cat on hot bricks describes the feeling well. Once I start moving / guest I'm expecting arrives, I'm fine.

Have always been like it, to an extent. Good to know I'm not alone.

GoldenAge

Surprised to see so many gransnetters fretting, worrying, becoming stressed or whatever word you use. This is pure anxiety and you need to get some talking therapy to try to understand what it is in your particular case that's causing it. Life promises to be not so great, and to become smaller as time goes on if general anxiety and social anxiety take root. As a psychotherapist I will hopefully persuade those of you who do feel this way that if this is an evolving characteristic it is very likely to be down to changing identities (no longer being a work colleague, a mother of young children, a manager of other people, etc.) and the growing belief that you are somehow now incapable. Please just talk these feelings through with a counsellor/psychotherapist - your GP should be able to direct you to six free sessions with a qualified person.

incapable ? good lord

the notion that any GP could or would direct a patient on request to six free sessions with a ‘qualified person’ is both misleading and fantastical

Same here although Mr C is worse than I am. I often tell him he reminds me of a little boy, shoes and coat are on a good twenty minutes before we need to leave. That’s unless he’s engrossed in a book when he’s deaf to all entreaties to hurry up. It all seems pretty usual.

I am the same.

I can't stand waiting for anything. I always over prepare and end being early for everything. I dread afternoon appointments as I spend all day thinking about it.

I didn't expect so many people to be the same.

Talking therapy

It seems nowadays that suffering from any anxiety or fretting means you need ‘therapy’.

But sometimes, it’s just ‘life’, which unfortunately doesn’t go along swimmingly all the time.

Talking things through with a friend, not a therapist, can put stuff into perspective, ‘a trouble shared’, which is probably what women do more than men.

No wonder so many children are growing up with all sorts of ‘issues’ from an early age.

Thinking about all this can set off more worrying, if you let it!

It's a bit of a relief to hear I'm not the only one.

In the days when Ma and Pa in-Law were alive, it was a standing joke that if we were taking them anywhere, they'd be sat with coats on several hours ahead of time.

They had several coach tour holidays, and were usually at the pick-up point at least an hour ahead of the stated time.

I'm afraid this trait doesn't apply to me, I've made almost a life's work of cutting things fine, or being fashionably late?

I'm the same and I hate it. I used to do so many things in one day and now I spread them out through the week. If I don't exercise first thing in the morning I don't do it at all and then the day is written off! I can only seem to cope with one appointment a day and then want to be at home for 3ish otherwise I'get anxious. Once home I have nothing to do at home and I'm bored but I can't cope with going out again. Too much time on my hands and my m letting it take me over! 😢

Cid24

I’m sure it’s since retirement there’s more time to fret

Fair comment.

I sometimes think that it's not because I'm not around people, it's more that I don't think many people understand me. I do tend to keep my feelings inside though. But then so many at this age have anxieties and I end up trying to pacify them ,as I think it's so sad and just want to help them to feel better. It would be nice if the NHS could be more aware of this age groups anxieties. I did once,a few years ago do an online CBT course. It was awful as it was aimed at teenagers too, a one size fits all. Some of the questions were daft eg how would you feel if your best friend walked past you in the street. I thought that was directed at teenagers as I'd have thought the silly bugger didn't see me. So each age group has a different set of anxiety, some may overlap. But on the whole different problems affect different age groups. But the NHS seemed to be generic in their support. One size doesn't fit all.

Cid24

Lately I’ve found that if I’m due to do something in the afternoon or even , I can’t settle to anything, am like a cat on hit bricks counting down until the time I have to get ready and go. Is anyone else like this? I never used to be like it.

I've been like this all my life! I move heaven and earth to get an early appointment for whatever.

I feel like that sometimes. My theory is that I'm still subconsciously 'at work' and that activities just punctuate the day instead of filling it.

Goldenage, I think you’re pathologising something that is perfectly normal especially as we get older. Yes, many of us have lost some of our confidence but this seems to me to be a perfectly reasonable response to ageing which makes many things that much more difficult. Our sight and hearing may not be so good, we can’t move as fast as we did and it possibly takes us longer to process things. We may irritate ourselves but I doubt many of us need therapy.

GoldenAge

Surprised to see so many gransnetters fretting, worrying, becoming stressed or whatever word you use. This is pure anxiety and you need to get some talking therapy to try to understand what it is in your particular case that's causing it. Life promises to be not so great, and to become smaller as time goes on if general anxiety and social anxiety take root. As a psychotherapist I will hopefully persuade those of you who do feel this way that if this is an evolving characteristic it is very likely to be down to changing identities (no longer being a work colleague, a mother of young children, a manager of other people, etc.) and the growing belief that you are somehow now incapable. Please just talk these feelings through with a counsellor/psychotherapist - your GP should be able to direct you to six free sessions with a qualified person.

But how does one account for the fact that I find so many people so boring? They all talk about themselves and there are few people you can have a good chat with. I know everything about their grandchildren, son and daughter in law and their ailments and they know little or ask nothing about me. I prefer to do my own things now as I just come otherwise thinking 'Well, that was a waste of time!'

I know a lady who can do three things in a day, morning, noon and night. She is in her mid 70s. It takes me all day to do one thing.

Surprised to see so many gransnetters fretting, worrying, becoming stressed or whatever word you use. This is pure anxiety and you need to get some talking therapy to try to understand what it is in your particular case that's causing it. Life promises to be not so great, and to become smaller as time goes on if general anxiety and social anxiety take root. As a psychotherapist I will hopefully persuade those of you who do feel this way that if this is an evolving characteristic it is very likely to be down to changing identities (no longer being a work colleague, a mother of young children, a manager of other people, etc.) and the growing belief that you are somehow now incapable. Please just talk these feelings through with a counsellor/psychotherapist - your GP should be able to direct you to six free sessions with a qualified person.

Absolutely. I thought it was just me going mad. I've coped with so many things in the past, and now even doing one thing in a day gets me worried.

Exactly the same. If I have to go somewhere in the morning I have trouble sleeping too.

You all sound like me. It must be an age thing! I feel like I can only do that one thing in a day and the rest of the day is wasted and anxiety inducing. Weird cos it's made me not want to commit to anything...then I become a bit isolated.

AuntieE

I have always had a slight tendency to this, probably because I was brought up to consider it the height of rudeness to be late for any appointment. Or too early for that matter, but at least if one arrives early, then you can walk up and down the street for a while.

Now that I live in a country area where there is only one bus an hour on weekdays, and one every second hour on Sundays, I find it even harder to do anything right up to the last minute at home, as obviously, it is not a good idea to miss the only possible bus.

I’m never late unless there are unforeseen circumstances where they can’t be avoided.
But I certainly dont sit around all day waiting for the time I have to go out.

I have always had a slight tendency to this, probably because I was brought up to consider it the height of rudeness to be late for any appointment. Or too early for that matter, but at least if one arrives early, then you can walk up and down the street for a while.

Now that I live in a country area where there is only one bus an hour on weekdays, and one every second hour on Sundays, I find it even harder to do anything right up to the last minute at home, as obviously, it is not a good idea to miss the only possible bus.

I still waste time worrying in advance/getting distracted about going out and I'm not even retired yet!

Well, I am flying of tomorrow to Spain and of course, packing too much stuff and worrying that I probably won’t be able to get to sleep until very late or not at all.

I’m another worrier and like others, get ready far too early and fret about what I’m going to wear.
I’ve packed far too many dresses.
Just in case! Well you never know.

Even though tonight in aust where I’m from I am sitting up as I burnt my right breast in a cooking acc lol yep getting corn meat out of slow cooker it broke in half splashed water on my breast burn size of a twenty cent hv started taking antibotic just four in one day not sure there working a little stressed so I’m up drinking hot choc and looking at grans net lol