Unappreciative people

Most tradesmen have several of certain items. My husband leaves tools all over the place. Most people ring him and he thanks them and says he will collect next time he is in the area and he does. He usually takes them a small token like a box of maltesers or some posh biscuits.

I think that every workman we have has left a tool of some sort. Someone left a very good quality handsaw in the summer. We contacted the tree surgeon and the joiner but neither came back for it. I have a really good collection of screwdrivers as well.

I had a guy fit my cooker from a well known company. After he left I noticed a tool he’d been using was there I texted him and he text back the next day to say when he’d call to collect it. That’s over two weeks ago never even turned up. The tool was about £20 and I know he would if needed it. But hey ho it’s still here waiting for his owner.

No, DaisyAnneReturns , I have to disagree with you, rude is not a purposeless word at all.
If people can’t acknowledge the kindness of others when they have gone to the trouble of handing in a lost item of theirs, or posted them on to them, then I think they are rather rude and bad mannered. (Of course, there will be instances when it won’t be possible to say “thank you” because the person who did the good deed might not be contactable, but in Chardy’s case, the people she set out to help were, in my opinion, rather rude in their attitude).
Saying thank you shouldn’t be so difficult, really, should it? Saying being busy as an excuse is rather a thin excuse in my opinion.

DaisyAnneReturns

Rude is just such a purposeless word. What does it actually mean in this instance? That someone was rather thoughtless and we all have far to much spare time, so can dwell on it.

Not sure why I have to explain myself to you but in Chardy’s scenario “rude” means just that, rude and ignorant.

Surely any rightminded person who had been told all their cards had been found and were safe and being forwarded to them meaning they did not have to go to the bother of contacting banks and building societies, would be grateful and not mess about the finder.

Rude is just such a purposeless word. What does it actually mean in this instance? That someone was rather thoughtless and we all have far to much spare time, so can dwell on it.

Chardy

I found assorted 5 bank and credit cards on the beach. DD contacted owner via Facrbook who we thought must be ripping her hair out by now, to say we'd send them registered post. Yes please was the reply, but later that evening, she changed her mind. Her daughter, who she'd been visiting, would come and collect them. Nothing happened. A few days later she changed her mind again. Back to Plan A. We really had lost interest! It was now 4 or 5 days later, frankly we were busy, and this family didn't seem that bothered. A couple of days later "Where are my bank cards?" on Facebook. They got sent. Obviously there was no Thank You or They've arrived. Obviously no offer of paying the postage! Nothing!

Chardy I think that is just so rude of them.

Another time I found a wallet on a grass verge on my early dog walk. There was about £30 plus a load of cards in it. I recognised the unusual name as someone from the next village. By late afternoon I had managed to find someone who had his mobile number. She left a message for him to ring me, which he did and he asked me to take it down to him! I said I was cooking and the car was in the garage, blocked in by a van and another car.

He grudgingly drove up, looked in the wallet to make sure the money was still there, then looked me straight in the eye and said “I cancelled the cards this morning”. So I assume he thought the finder would try to use his cards. made me feel very uncomfortable?

Aged 10, I found a purse in our public phone box. What should I do, yes take it to the local post office, postmaster said he would notify the local Bobby. Three months later, the local Bobby appeared at the door, with the purse. No one had claimed it, so it was mine. Had £1. 10 shillings in it , plus small pair nail scissors. So much simpler in those days. Would do the same again, I wouldn't want the responsibility of giving it to the wrong person, especially nowadays.

Like others I was bought up to do the right thing and that won't change. I've never received anything for doing it, the one that sticks out for me was the purse I found leaving the hairdressers on way ou, it was full of cards and money so I went up stairs leading to the salon and asked the receptionist if the client was having her hair done, they had my number and the ourse I never heard a thing. I never expect a reward obviously, a thank you would be nice but unlikely. I have often been very grateful for the generosity of others in my life.

I know what you mean but one of my kids asked me if I had ever received it. I don’t need a tenner from anybody and had forgotten about it until I was reminded.

In the unlikely event that it does ever turn up I will give it to charity anyway. 🙂

I think the "tenner" is a distraction telling you more about his attitude to life than yours Primrose.

I am sorry (for you) that this person has behaved so thoughtlessly but this incident was three weeks ago and you change nothing by dwelling on it.

A close relative of mine is a psychologist who works with children and young people (gruelling stuff). A long time ago she told me that the most difficult thing, where many of her clients to get stuck, is enabling them to grasp the fact that you cannot change the other person, only your attitude to them.

You are at this place currently. This person was only worth your time and emotion when it came to returning his possession to him. He is not worth any more of either and however much angst you and others spend on him, he will not change or even understand what he has done.

It's time to replace the effort you are allowing him - of which he is completely oblivious - with something that brings you more pleasure and peace.

The police aren’t keen to deal with lost property these days. I think most forces have a website similar to this one which you can use to get advice on what to do about various types of lost and found items.

It’s quite interesting to have a look through and see how few things the police will help with these days.

www.derbyshire.police.uk/ro/report/lp/lost-or-found-property/?stepid=1-2-2&rid=5

On my mobile if I find I have mislaid my card/s I can go into my app and freeze the card, normally It will turn up, if not then I can cancel it via the app.y

Just to clear up a few things firstly to DaisyAnneReturns
I didn’t expect anything at all but I did send the card Signed For, he did keep messaging me and HE said he would put a tenner in the post. Why say it, then not do it and then lie and say he would check with his bank!🤣

A few weeks ago I mislaid my debit card and had to cancel it and waited a week for the Bank to send a new one so I was anxious to reunite THIS card with it’s owner to avoid a lengthy wait.

All our small police stations have closed down and I am not going on a long drive and wasting fuel.

I would never dream of not giving a token of thanks if somebody found something of mine.

Anyway the tenner has still not arrived. 😝

eazybee

I have been reading these posts and thinking I would hand anything similar into the Police station; it then occurred to me I have not the faintest idea where my local Police station is.
I know where the Fire Station is, and the Law Courts and the Civic Centre, but the Police?
(hope I am not tempting fate and will find out in an unpleasant way soon.)

You probably had one at one point but, like ours, it's been closed.

About 50% of the 'cop-shops' with front counters have gone.

London's Met has lost somewhere in the region of close to three-quarters of theirs.

The 'argument' was that people don't use police stations the way they did... though I would suggest the change in behaviour is because of the closures. You can't use a police station "the way you did" if they are not there anymore!

If I found a purse or wallet, I'd have to get on two buses (can't drive anymore) for a 20 mile journey to hand it in. I think I'd rather contact the owner and put the onus on them to collect it!

I have been reading these posts and thinking I would hand anything similar into the Police station; it then occurred to me I have not the faintest idea where my local Police station is.
I know where the Fire Station is, and the Law Courts and the Civic Centre, but the Police?
(hope I am not tempting fate and will find out in an unpleasant way soon.)

Some years ago I had my bag snatched from the front passenger seat of the car, while I was waiting at a junction. (That certainly taught me always to use central locking!)

Many months later we came home one day to find the leather purse that had been in that bag, shoved through the letterbox. Someone who lived not a million miles away had found it while clearing undergrowth from their garden. The purse was mildewed, but my driving licence (with my address) and sundry other cards that were of no value to the thief, were still there! I hadn’t yet bothered to replace the driving licence.

The finder left a note with their address, so of course I sent a note of most sincere thanks.

bikergran

If we find mobiles/ bank cards in our supermarket, they are handed in to customer services as its not very long before the customer comes running back in, not sure if they get a thanks but I would hope so. If I ever loose my bank card/s I cancel straight away and just order new ones.

In ours, they are kept for one day at the customer services desk and then destroyed if not claimed. As someone who may not try to use a bank card in the 24 hours after dropping it, that means that by the time I do realise it has gone, it no longer exists, so I have to go through the whole replacement procedure before I can shop.

My DDs used to regularly lose their bus passes. The stop was at the top of a very steep hill. I gave one money and as she went for the bus a lady came out of a house and gave her, her pass. It did not have our address but she knew who she was looking for. We took her a box of chocolates. It doesn't take much to say thank you.

If we find mobiles/ bank cards in our supermarket, they are handed in to customer services as its not very long before the customer comes running back in, not sure if they get a thanks but I would hope so. If I ever loose my bank card/s I cancel straight away and just order new ones.

We were driving from our home in Shropshire to the lakes for a holiday with our 3 Children en route my husband had to drop off some documents at a customers ( a well known furniture manufacturers ).

On arrival at their premises the steering on our car went off and we realised we had a serious problem.

The company insisted myself and the children went inside, they provided tea, squash and cakes.

They then loaned us a very nice estate car for the week and arranged for our car to be collected, repaired and returned to them!

We were eternally grateful, we wrote and expressed our gratitude and took some treats in for staff.

How very kind, I’ve never forgotten, I’m sitting on one of their beautiful armchairs now typing!

Yes people can be very ungrateful.

A package for someone on the other side of the estate was left by Evri on the pavement outside my gate. My gardener brought it in and if was only after he left that I looked at it and realised it was misdelivered. I had no way of contacting the intended recipient and am not mobile enough to walk so far. 2 days later when my nephew turned up he kindly made a special trip to take the package. The woman was very rude and said "Couldnt you have brought it sooner? We had to ring the seller". Nephew told her that the courier had dumped it outside the house of his disabled aunt. He added that next time it happened he would advise me to leave it where it was to get stolen or spoiled by the rain.

'Thank you' is just good manners.

I lost my purse a while ago and a kind person took it to the police station - this is a fair way away so I was very appreciative when a policeman arrived on my doorstep with my purse and all the contents intact. The person hadn't left any contact details so I couldn't thank them. I still feel that that is unfinished business somehow.

Chardy Such rude people. I think you were very good.

I found assorted 5 bank and credit cards on the beach. DD contacted owner via Facrbook who we thought must be ripping her hair out by now, to say we'd send them registered post. Yes please was the reply, but later that evening, she changed her mind. Her daughter, who she'd been visiting, would come and collect them. Nothing happened. A few days later she changed her mind again. Back to Plan A. We really had lost interest! It was now 4 or 5 days later, frankly we were busy, and this family didn't seem that bothered. A couple of days later "Where are my bank cards?" on Facebook. They got sent. Obviously there was no Thank You or They've arrived. Obviously no offer of paying the postage! Nothing!