unexplained bruising starts a panic!

When I was teaching in an infant school we had to log any bruises/marks at school. We had body maps and had to draw where the bruise was, and at the side annotate it, so what it looked like, approximate size, colour, what the child had said had happened when asked (they often didn’t know) and sign and date it. Also the names of any other staff who had seen it. It was then filed and wouldn’t be seen again unless any further marks were noted. There would normally need to be several marks before Social Services would be informed. Obviously if even one mark was suspicious we would have acted. But children sustain mild injuries all the time through normal play and activities and whilst we need to be diligent, we need to expect children to be engaged in rough and tumble play and also to have minor accidents.

It does seem heavy handed of the nursery to involve SS before anything else. Especially as the small child had to be interrogated. He is only 3 for heaven's sake!

When aged 11 and small for his age, my DS was frightened by a strange man who offered him a lift after football practice. He told us and we were pleased he had said no and ran home. He begged us not to call the police but we did. I felt it was important to make others aware. 2 uniformed police arrived and took him away from us to "interview" him. He was very upset and I think it may have made him less likely to confide in us. It's a long time ago but not forgotten.

MummyJoJo62 my instinct is to say better safe than sorry in a general way, but if the child is really happy at the nursery why change it because they were over -cautious?

My youngest daughter was extremely accident prone. She fell over her own feet. She always had cuts and bruises. She broke her arm when she was 5. Spent an overnight in hospital arm was in plaster for 4 weeks. She also had her appendix removed when she was 5. No one questioned anything.

Jesus! My 11 year old granddaughter was often covered in bruises when she was that age ….nobody said a thing ! Change nurseries.

The nursery is caught between a rock and a hard place now safeguarding has become such a stick for Ofsted to beat education providers with. Do they report everything to cover themselves and risk upsetting parents? Or do they exercise common sense but risk an ‘inadequate’ Ofsted rating.

Thank goodness not all nurseries are so jumpy. My DGS is not quite 4, and permanently covered in bumps and bruises. He has no sense of danger or self preservation, tell him not to do something and as soon as you've let go of him he'll do it twice, hurt himself, get up shrug and try to do it again! I feel for your DD and her family xx

If you had read the recent news about the parents who killed their 9 year son by holding him underneath the bath water amongst other things, even though many people had reported them to the authorities over a long period of time, I think you would understand why many of those involved in child care are very much on the alert.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12190697/Ten-missed-opportunities-save-Alfie-Steele-neighbours-pleaded-police-teachers.html

Surely it’s better that a nursery or school reports than child cruelty and abuse goes undetected?

agree with GSM, and her previous comment.

My SIL’s ex has been reported three times for hitting the children, twice by the school he attends and she (then) was working. They called police and SS and nothing was done as she refused to cooperate. She has now accused SIL of causing unexplained injuries, one was a splinter, which she said he should have gone to A&E for! The other was perfectly explained at the time. He has had access rights taken away while an investigation has been undertaken and now has to go back to court (many thousands of £ to regain access, which was stopped by the mother). SS are well aware there is no issue with the dad and have said they are very concerned about mum’s mental state but he may still lose access, despite having done nothing to deserve it. The solicitor says that no one can predict the family courts. It’s unbearable to be accused (totally without foundation and be cleared) and not be allowed to the children that the ex has been found to cause harm to. The world has gone mad.

The social workers who work with family course are pretty astute. The woman sounds slightly less than the full shilling.

I hope so GSM, in the meantime no contact, mounting legal bills (she gets legal aid, she’s an abused woman because he didn’t tell her how much he earned and he offered to take care of her when she fell pregnant a few weeks after they met). He didn’t have a solicitor at the initial hearing and although 8 of the accusations against him by her were clearly unsubstantiated, the financial control was found against him, also emotional abuse as he’d asked her to have an abortion. She told him not to bother with a lawyer and then ambushed him. I do wish the playing field was more level. The initial order cost him £40k. How men cope with this I do not know, he is at the lowest I’ve ever seen him. It’s so sad. Hopefully a barrister and full legal support this time will actually mean lower costs as we won’t be playing catch up. But people like this must make genuine abused women sick. She now has free legal aid for any matter related to family courts. She’s clever but awful. I could say a lot but of course I will not. I know this is the wrong forum to discuss so I’ll leave it there.

He should have had legal representation from the outset.

I’m another saying if your grandson is happy at the nursery the parents shouldn’t change it. Apart from anything else it would be another marker for SS or HV. (Why have parents removed their happily settled child just after nursery reported a possible safeguarding incident?)

Much better to be the parents who are confident that both they and the nursery have behaved correctly.

Presumably they read the nursery’s policies and ts & cs and signed to say they had, when they booked a place for their son. They will know the nursery has a duty of care and is obliged to notify safeguarding authorities if a child presents with injuries that cannot be explained. It is distressing and embarrassing but better to investigate and be proved wrong than not to investigate and miss another child abuse case.

We live in a very different world now from when ours were little. Some things are more worrying but safeguarding should not be one of them.

I was the designated teacher for CP at my infants’ school. We logged any unexplained bruising and indeed anything a child said that might be worrying. SS were informed after a third worry of any sort was raised.

The poor little guy may be intimidated by the inquiries about how the bruise happened. Asking what happened, or where did that bruise come from might not make any sense to a small child. I call my granddaughter my adventure babe, (just like her Daddy was), and if she sports a new bruise or scab, I'll ask what the adventure was, and leave it at that, and not create worry for her. Half the time the injury is lost in the mist of time (10 minutes or 10 hours ago). She has gotten over it, and is moving forward to the next adventure.

I’m sure nursery and school staff are trained to enquire about these things in an appropriate and sensitive manner.

Get your daughter to take him to the GP as this may be him having a low platelet level which can cause unexplained bruising...am sure its nothing but worth a check

One bruise shouldn’t have attracted social services. I work in a private nursery and it would have been a few bruises and unexplained. Don’t see how this has happened.

One of my son's hit his head on a bit of display in a shoe shop. I took him to the GP - 25 years ago, back in the days when you could get a same day emergency appointment - and the GP was sarcastic and very rude and insisted it wasn't an appropriate reason for an appointment as boys got bruises. Huge bruise on his head and nobody concerned, how times have changed!

MrsKen33

I was the designated teacher for CP at my infants’ school. We logged any unexplained bruising and indeed anything a child said that might be worrying. SS were informed after a third worry of any sort was raised.

I think this is a much more sensible approach certainly not on the first sign of a bruise
If the social workers are going to every bruise, no wonder there are no social workers left to follow up real harmful situations

I had twin boys who were always falling over and bashing into things and each other! We had many visits to A & E and during a particular few months I attended 3 times… twin A was bitten by a dog, then knocked over , then twin B fell out of a tree and broke his arm. On the last occasion, I was greeted by name by one of the nurses, which didn’t look good for me, as she thought it was the same child… they are identical! I lived in fear of social services knocking. My first question would have been, have you ever had boys? I was never at the hospital with my older girl!

Mandated reporters.Every nurse,doctor,teacher,bus driver.
They can be held accountable if it was abuse and they failed to report it.

Do not change nursery. They seem to be a good one, and following CP rules and regulations.

Surely, it is better for a hundred innocent parents/carers are interviewed about an unxplained injury to a child, than one serious case is missed.

A few years back, my Son in Law was checked by SS. One of his children (aged 7 yrs old) was seen to have carpet burns on their back I (seen at school whilst changing for PE lesson). She was asked how this had happened and blithely said 'Daddy did it'!!! Therefore alarm bells!!!

What had actually happened, is that she had been having a sulk (she was a champion sulker) and lying on the landing floor at the top of the stairs. Dad had asked, several times that she move so that he could take baby down the stairs safely for his breakfast. She refused and eventually he had put baby down, and stretched out towards her (meaning to remove her from that place), she had pulled away, lost her balance and fallen down a few stairs before he had managed to grab her and prevent her falling further. However, as she was not wearing much a the time, (she was sulking as she said she did not want to get dressed), she had substained that carpet burn.

This was made all the worse, when both her parents tried to explain toher after the SS visit what it was all about, and perhaps she shoudl think more carefully before telling teachers it was Dad (or Mums) fault in future. So, when a couple of weeks later a teacher asked if everything was okay at home she then told them that she was not allowed to talk to them about that!!!

Okay this all happened several years ago and this 'child' is happily esconsced at University now.

To my mind I am so happy that SS are doing the job they are supposed to do. So many of them have such serious hsortage of staff they are unable to follow up such reports. Surely, prevention is so much the best policy.