Embarrassing moments

DH and I were on a walking tour of Paris, following a guide book on my kindle. He was desperate for the toilet but point blank refused to use one that opened automatically because of an “incident” in his past. He refused to elaborate and I’m afraid I laughed so much I dropped the kindle on the cobbles and the screen cracked. He still hasn’t told me the tale, so we’re not alone, Scottiebear, in having embarrassing secrets!

I was using a public loo in Ludlow that opened directly onto the footpath to the car park. To my shock and horror it automatically opened after a given time revealing me to everyone walking past! What a scramble!

Years ago when I was massively pregnant, I was sitting on the crowded bus on the way home from work when I could see a little boy and his Mum sitting opposite were whispering and looking at me. Suddenly the little boy pointed at me and in a loud voice said “is the pram in there as well” 😂

Ah I love this… bet you made his day and in turn a smile on your face.

Went for a bath one evening and dumped clothes in the bedroom afterwards. The next morning, I went to my local Asda, did a shop then noticed in a mirror that I had a sanitary towel (clean fortunately) stuck to the hem of my trousers by one of its ‘wings’ So mortified. 🫣

Decades ago when walking to my mother’s office, I spotted a very good friend in the distance, as she was looking towards me I waved like mad and started running towards her…as I got nearer I realised it wasn’t her… so just carried on waving and ran past her…for a long time til I was out of sight!

Many year ago I was at work and put a tampon in my lab coat pocket before going to the loo. As I walked down the corridor it fell out of a hole in said pocket. As it bounced along the floor a male colleague said " I think you just dropped something." I don't know if he realised what it was but I grabbed it and disappeared as fast as I could.

Maghiemaybe. I too have a very embarrassing incident which only a couple of close friends know of. Too mortifying to raise here. Referred to as the Canal incident by my hubby.

my eldest daughter was 4 and not long started school. (early 80's) and one day her and the other girls went into the boys toilets to watch them pee into sinks.....urinals but they had no idea what they were. So I explained best I could how boys ( like she knew her dad did) stand up to go the toilet as they can pull out their penis and these are better designed than toilets for boys.
A few days later we are in swimming when a VERY well endowed gent can into the pool wearing budgie smugglers, at the top of her voice that echoed round the whole pool my daughter kindly points out - mum that man has peanuts to pee in the urinal with.....not sure who was more mortified me or him.

During lockdown I had to go to the health centre. Hubby drove me and parked a little distance away. When I came out I saw he'd moved the car nearer. I jumped in and a voice said hello. To my horror I'd jumped into a strangers car. I was horrified and couldn't stop apologising.

At 18 I went with a fairly new boyfriend on his works coach trip to an exhibition followed by a meal in a posh restaurant. After visiting the upstairs ladies loo I slipped, on my bottom, down the whole flight of stairs right into the middle of the room full of diners, breaking both heels off my shoes! No injuries but I I can still feel the blushes 50+ years later!

I too have had my moments, but they are just so, so embarassing that I am sitting here feeling hot and bothered just thinking of them. Alan Bennett said that his embarassing moments can still make him fidget and blush, although the people involved are long dead now. I know exactly how he felt. However, those who have been kind and brave enough to share - you have certainly made me laugh this afternoon!

NanaDana

I'm thinking of approaching Netflix with a proposal to perhaps make a series out of my embarrassing moments. Maybe four or five seasons would do do it... but then again, I'm still clocking them up, so maybe leave it open...

Me too. I’ve done the odd shoes, the knickers falling out of jeans, using the wrong loo, chatting up a complete stranger, clothes tucked in knickers, leaping into the wrong car (twice in a week - the first young driver looked so terrified I bet he’s still having flashbacks). And so much more. Just yesterday I ended up in a Weightwatchers meeting instead of the community group one in the next room.

And my most embarrassing moment, in fact my three most embarrassing moments, were so mortifying I’m never going to speak of them!

I always remember the story my mum told me of my grandmother who was a singer in the local church choir (back in the 50s). She was always a very smart dresser complete with hat of course - she stood up to Sing her solo, she had opened her coat and all my mum could see (and the rest of the congregation) was her floral cross over apron, she didn’t realise until she was finished singing and sat down, mum said the look of horror on her face, mum and dad were in stitches!!

Unfortunately I have a habit of dozing off at inopportune moments. On this occasion I was in the aisle seat of a bus when I keeled over suddenly finding my head on some unknown gent's knees!!
Don't know who got the bigger shock!!

I walked back into a posh pub from the loo and joined a group of male and female friends sitting on pub comfy sofas. Stretched legs out and there inside my tights, right at the front of my lower leg, was the tampax (new) that I'd managed to drop whilst taking it out of wrapper. Wasnt about to contact intensive search, so I used another one. Pub lounge was brightly lit as it was lunchtime. Did my best to cross legs and manoeuvre it round back and up, but I'm sure I was getting some curious looks as I wriggled around.

We’d had birthday cake and sang happy birthday to a colleague one morning. We had the ‘investor in people’ organisation in for random interviews and I’d been selected for interview just before lunch. I spoke with the person about our organisation for a full 45 minutes before seeing my reflection in the door as I said goodbye and left; I had a pointy shiny party hat on complete with trailing ribbons. I’d completely forgotten it and couldn’t feel it as it was so light. The woman saw my face as I realised and we both laughed. How she kept serious through the interview I don’t know.

@Poppyjo
As the mum of the UK’s handsomest PC (well, in my view) I can assure you you made his day.

I was in a large department store and decided I'd use their loos. Walked in, into a cubicle and whilst in there I heard the main door opening and closing but no cubicle doors shutting, in fact nothing, only when coming out the cubicle did I discover why, I was in the Gents. 2 men at urinals and another coming in. Didn't stop to wash my hands, out the door and then into the ladies next door.

I was married to a police officer and shopping in town one day, saw him ahead of me.

I ran up behind him and said something very naughty and grabbed his bottom.
It wasn't my husband.....

I was at a centre parcs sitting in my given dressing gown with my feet in a jacuzzi a man going past put his arm round me and said ‘enjoy it darling ‘ I blushed a hundred shades of purple and he was gone later he found me out and profusely apologised saying he thought it was his wife

Many years ago waiting to pay in a long queue at Boots the Chemist my 3 yr daughter was holding my hand and gazing around when, in a very loud voice, she said "Mummy, you've got a bogey up your nose"!

Did this very recently. I came out of the supermarket, walked up to what I thought was the taxi I'd ordered, opened the rear door, said "Hello" and threw my carrier bags full of groceries on to the back seat. Then I realised that it wasn't a taxi but some random car that was just parked there, waiting for someone.

Every evening at dusk I take a bowl of food out for our local fox who waits about 15 yards away from me on the lawn.

“Hello there Dopey” I called out, just then my neighbours head appeared over the fence “Oh hello there” he replied.

I'm thinking of approaching Netflix with a proposal to perhaps make a series out of my embarrassing moments. Maybe four or five seasons would do do it... but then again, I'm still clocking them up, so maybe leave it open...