Adult children home for Christmas

I’ve been very interested to read of everyone else’s experiences. I had a very bad night (overtired) so only came down after 11am to find my kitchen had been turned into a food factory. Granddaughter had been dispatched to her other granny (just a few doors away) and older son and his wife were making a Norwegian Kransekake (like this one) whilst my younger son was decorating a gingerbread house. Now the menfolk are walking the dogs via the pub and my daughter-in-law is visiting her mum and - here am I, with a cup of tea and Gransnet, having a most relaxing time!

It’s never the same number twice at ours for Christmas. I have four dc, three are married and have a total of five GC between them. They mostly get on well although there was a bust-up last year between the 4yo GS and the 5yo GD over a board game. The GS is a strict rule-follower while the GD pushes the boundaries - sparks flew!

This year my older DD is hosting, only the third Christmas I’ve spent away from home in 47 years.

We have 7 children, all married. Then there are 20 grandchildren and 5 have partners, then there are the 3 great grandchildren. The whole lot arrive early tomorrow morning and won’t leave until January 1st. We have wall to wall mattresses everywhere for sleeping. It is so much fun. We have our meal for dinner, so present giving happens middle afternoon. All the young ones have time to play with their presents from Santa before they open all the others. There is so much laughter and we love it. No one is allowed in my kitchen while I’m cooking. Our meal is a meal with all the trimmings, even though it is very hot here in Western Australia. The rest of the week is charging around the farm on quads, bikes, scooters, avoiding rescued livestock which roam freely. The whole family muck in and help with the 170plus of livestock, hundreds of rabbits and guinea pigs. The family bring their dogs and cats too and fortunately they all get on with the animals. It is truly wonderful and it is great to see our family interact so well and playing games. Some old fashioned farm life. Yes, it can be stressful making sure there is plenty of food and fridge space to accommodate the food. After Christmas Day, the kitchen is open for whoever wants to cook. No BBQs allowed in this time they are all here, not my favourite at all and have been known to hide gas bottles so it can’t be used. Husband is always exhausted afterwards but it is the one time of the year when they are all together under the same roof and I love it. Love the singing of Christmas carols at the end of Christmas Day and the little ones all go to sleep then, so adults can drink to their hearts content and no worrying about who is driving home. None of our children live locally so it takes between 2 to 3 hrs drive to come home.
Merry Christmas to everyone and enjoy this time

Whenever my adult children come to stay, they never muck in to help. The cooking, the washing up etc is all left to me and my partner.
So this year, we are having Xmas dinner in our own homes.
I’m too old now to be getting stressed out about all the work that’s involved in food preparation and cooking.
It’s a shame as I don’t mind the idea of a family Xmas, but I don’t want the hard work. And it is hard work.
Dd gets stressed as well, so that’s the solution we have arrived at.

Just me & DH again. I know I'm lucky we at least have each other. But... I do get very low & cover it up. I have 3 adult children,2 are married. The single one if off to his dads, they're mot close but he feels sorry for him. The eldest has his mil staying (again) even though she has lots of family shes close to where she lives, we have never been invited for xmas. The married youngest (lives short drive away) they go to inlaws-always have done since before we moved here & we're not invited. Its as though they (his family)resent us for muscling in. I find it very sad, I'd hoped for inclusion, different solutions attempted without joy, ,theyre resolute. Don't want to put DD in difficult position. We're told we're appreciated, loved, reliable & undemanding. Always there to help out but never for celebrations. Even when daughter attempted a turns system the inlaws hijacked it & that was that. I feel that being so reliably 'understanding' has made me a doormat.

Last year it was lovely when both dds with their dh or partner came and stayed, plus the two little Gdcs. I had really thought I'd never be doing a family Christmas again.

I'd be happy to do it again, but this year I'll be doing all the cooking at a dd's (I offered) since she's very heavily pregnant and it wouldn't be sensible to be a good 1 1/2 hour drive from the hospital - no. 2 arrived early and very speedily!

Lists, lists, lists - there are about a million things for dh to load into the car soon - every last thing for dinner tomorrow and stuff for Boxing Day. Spuds now boiling for the big fish pie we'll be having tonight.

Should add that son in law is very willing and capable and I'm sure would do it otherwise, but he has more energy for entertaining/running around with little Gdcs!

First Christmas totally on my own. AC dont visit. Last year a young lady invited me to share her families Xmas as my husband had died earlier in the year. This year i have been invited again but do not feel up to a "happy" Christmas so home alone.

I too am so lucky as my 3 AC and partners all get on so well together. Everyone pitches in with cooking plus clearing up and we have many laughs together. 5 GC all love being together too .... I’ve never met my Mr Right in life however, I’ve struck gold with my family and my happiness all comes from them.

Counting my blessings here three 37, 33, 24 none have yet missed being at home. It’s basic mismatched plates and settings and nothing pretentious anywhere. No shortage of
Cash as we all work ( not boasting) just not materialistic.
They all get on and are pleased to come together thankfully partners still happy enough with this, however not actually grandparents yet and how long this can last when that dynamic alters things ?‍♀️

I love it when my daughter, SIL, and grandson come to stay. Not very often as they live quite near, but they arrive mid-morning on Christmas Day, and stay for about 6 nights - best time.

A houseful from Boxing Day onwards, cousins generally best of friends, but my six year old grandson does get the girls bedroom door slammed in his face rather too often! For the first time oldest granddaughter won’t be with us, but we have a little one year old tottering around.
Half looking forward to it, half looking forward to it being over! Can’t stand the mess, my oldest daughter can be tricky, and she and her husband row a lot, always have.

I know I’m lucky to have them all, and I love to see them and spoil them, but after a few days, I’ll be craving some me time.

No-one coming.

My situation is usually similar to yours, granny activist, but this year DS1 and family will be staying in America as their new baby is not even 2weeks old yet.

I am just sitting in the airport now waiting for my baggage after having stayed with them for 10 days.

DS3 has come home and has been cooking for Dad whilst I was away and will come to lunch with us on Christmas day.

DS2 will come after Christmas once he has visited all the patchwork in-law's.

Gosh I do envy you grannyactivist! I see them all on Xmas day at daughters. We all used to be at my house till they got married and I lost husband now they don’t want to. Hope I’m not alone in this. And no one mucks in.. my mum used to come to my house after my dad died and there was lot of mucking in...though mum did most. Which I was happy to go along with. Daughter likes to be in control. DD does it perfectly and husband with her. I have to play guest and am very happy to go along with that too. I come from a line of strong minded bossy females (me included) so it is an art of compliance. I am very generous with money and presents they just don’t seem to want me to do the sprouts. ‘ take your blini and champagne and sit down’ I suppose we all do our best in our different ways.

I had 18 for Christmas Lunch on the 22nd, early but it solved everyone’s problem of where to go, the number is still growing, not with GC but with older GSs introducing girlfriends. I’m lucky everyone gets on and helps on the day.

I'd love it if my children spent Christmas with me, even though beds would be a problem. Or my younger brother who was homeless when I last heard from him.

However, none of them live in England any more, so I shall have to be content with e-mails and phone calls.

I would love that but I've never really had the space to do that. One family live 10 minutes away so I see then daily but the others live 150 miles away so I don't get to see them so often and not at Christmas.

We recently spent a weekend with them all in a house I rented equal distance from all of them. It is wonderful to have them all together. They are not in each other pockets ( because of the distances between us all) and there are differences of temperament. However I count myself very lucky that they all ( including my DIls ) are prepared to get on and get together.
It makes it easier if it is not in my home as I would end up doing everything.
My sister and brother quarrelled years ago and went NC with one another. it upset my Mother so much. They were so selfish and still are basically. They only thought about themselves and not my poor Mother.

Last year we had everyone here, with two families staying over, but this year half the family have chosen not to spend Christmas with us, and we will see one family for a few hours on Christmas Day and the last on on Boxing Day. Enjoy you reunion, sounds like heaven!

That used to happen, when I lived in the family home with lots of room, but now I have a two bedroom apartment and they have their own houses and families, so Christmases are different every year. I have always gone to one or other of my daughters, but this year I will be at home hosting my son, and two friends who can’t get home for Christmas and would otherwise be alone. I will see the others over the holiday, and Skype in the morning. I did enjoy it when they all came home, and they did all muck in, so it was always a happy time. But things move on, and situations change, and we make new memories. Happy Christmas everyone!

Myself and both daughters, SIL and grandchildren will all be together at DD2’s house but DD1 lives next door so we all chip in to help and will have a lovely time.

I will be chief vegetable preparer but both girls are better cooks than I am so they will cook and I will clear and load the dishwasher. We will watch tele together and play board games and there will be lots of good natured teasing. We make a lot of Christmas and I’m really looking forward to it. When I lived in Wales the often travelled to me for Christmas

Most of ours will be here for varying lengths of time .

DS1 will come for the day,
Dd1 and her family will come for the day, go home and then travel North to DSiL's family
DD2 and her family will come after breakfast on Christmas Day and leave at the weekend
DD3 will also come after breakfast on Christmas day and leave in the evening - they might turn up a couple of times over the school holidays as they only live 30 minutes away.

The only one missing will be DS2 and family as their boys are students who work in hotels and earn a fortune if they work on 'the' day. They will all eat in the evening at their home but will pop in over the holidays as they live in the next village.

They are all bringing contributions to the meal and will clear up afterwards.

We then have the marathon present opening!

We have a big family and they will all come back to the family home for Christmas and all muck in with the jobs happily and it’s jolly and high spirited. I am always a little on edge though in case of any underlying friction between two of the girls which might surface. I can’t fully relax which is a shame but I couldn’t bear any confrontations so am on alert to jump in and smooth over anything. It’s easy to say to just let them get on with it - but it’s me who suffers afterwards when they both bend my ear. I won’t take sides and am diplomatic- but I don’t need it. I could ask them just to leave me out of it - but then I would worry more about what I don’t know. Having said this - hopefully all will just be fun and laughter as it is pretty much all the time. Merry Christmas!

This will be the first year for ages that we haven't had everyone here for Christmas. Last year we were 23 round the tables!
We have been invited to DD's which is lovely but the others will be scattered and I'm sure we will miss the games and convivial atmosphere.
We will have the wee ones instead.
Enjoy it grannyactivist. It is a very special time.

It would be lovely to have my 3 together for Christmas, it’s not going to happen as my son lives abroad with his family. Sadly my house isn’t big enough to accommodate them all anyway.
Enjoy your family Christmas.