dancing queen

Lovebeigecardigans

Now, Baby Showers!

That annoys me even more than proms!

The only ritual I remember when I left school was throwing my horrible school hat into the River Clyde.

Everything is getting Americanised these days. In the 1930s we had an end of term assembly and sang the hymn “Now thank we all our God” surreptishly singing our own words. Collected all our sports gear and left.

I'm with you Petunia, it's a horrible American import along with Halloween, baby showers, etc. It puts pressure on youngsters to get the perfect dress, hair and make-up. So glad I didn't have this when I was young.

Petunia, you are not being a spoil sport, you are being absolutely sensible. The question of the rights and wrongs of proms led to the end of a 40+ year friendship for me. My former friend had a cleaner who had run into debt with a payday loan company to pay for her daughter to have the same as everyone else - limo, dress, facial, manicure etc etc. I said I thought the whole business was a disgrace, that schools should not allow it, that it discriminates against children whose parents cannot afford it etc. At this, my ‘friend’ told me I had broken her cleaners heart, that I shouldn’t have expressed my opinion and that, plus other things has resulted in a complete breakdown in our former friendship. I think a school disco, where pupils can wear their own clothes and enjoy the last day of term is great, but this nonsense of prom events is yet another money spinner from the USA. And as the grandmother of two American children who aged 5 and 6 have just ‘graduated ‘ from preschool and first year infant school, I do know what I’m talking about.

I gre up in South Africa. I made my own dress for the school leaving party in 1960. I was 19 and the dress was pale green satin with a pale green net overskirt which I attached green sequins to. It was lovely. I bought gold shoes with 6 inch heels in a sale for 5 shillings. I had no boyfriend, so my friend fixed me up with a blind date with one of her friends. I spent hours agonising over how tall he would be, as with my 6 inch heels I would be 5ft 10. Luckily when he arrived he was about 6ft 6. It was a nice party but obviously I did not make much of an impression as I never saw him again.
A week later my family and I had a table sale in our garden. The green dress was included. An African lady tried to buy it for £1..00 as a dress for her niece who was getting married. I wanted £2.00. We could not agree, and she left. I went into lunch and after a few minutes I came outside again and the dress had vanished. I should have taken the £1. I bet the bride looked lovely in my dress.

I think the Prom fashion started about 15yrs ago. We always used to put on something for the Y11 leavers, I remember disc is, and a boat trip in about '95.

Obviously staff have to dress up - that's an expense - I really lost it when about 8 yrs ago we were told staff were expected to pay. Lol. Five hrs of anyone else's Friday time 7pm to midnight would cost you £100. So l said no. Colleagues went along late, so they missed the meal, but had a drink, but that was stopped the year after. Though I would probably have paid to see a few senior teachers struggling to organise all those pupils when they didn't know any of their names! I would go and see the Y11s off, take photos of those I was sad to see leave, but I just felt the academy was taking the mick.

They have travelled across the Atlantic, I think, Mcrc and also are 'de rigueur' in Australia too but they're called 'Formals' there, everyone striving to arrive in the most unusual transport.

I think they happen quite world-wide nowadays.

I'm an American and I didn't realize you had proms in the UK, which is pretty ignorant of me! But I agree they can be over the top here as well. I didn't go to mine and I wished I had but I am just fine and honestly didn't feel left out. But this was long before social media and the pressure now must be immense. I feel bad for the young people and for their parents.

I think it’s a lovely idea for 18 year olds personally. Saying goodbye to school days and friends before going out into the wide world But one-upmanship and OTT expenses are simply stupid. Obviously lots of young people will ask for outrageous things and bemoan “all my friends are getting....” but it’s pare responsibility to reign them in. My eldest daughter had one 14 years ago and she got a beautiful dress in the sales (used again for a Uni ball), did her own hair and makeup, and her friends clubbed together to hire a limo so was only a little more than a taxi would have cost and 10 of them traveled together. A lovely evening and she still mentions it all these years later. My youngest DD will hopefully have hers in a few years and I’m looking forward to it, but without the extreme expense of others.
However similar could be said about choices for weddings with some brides/families going stupidly crazy. A friend was still paying for her DD’s wedding long after the divorce!

It’s all rubbish American clap-trap...what was wrong with the end of school party. Call it a prom and all hell breaks loose. Don’t buy into it mums and dads.

When my grandson left sixth form,he and a group of like-minded friends had an "anti-prom" night.Instead of all the stress and expense of a prom,they dressed casually and had a great night out at a restaurant.I think they enjoyed it much more than they would have a formal,dressy evening.

We have a 'signed shirt' somewhere upstairs too, although it was signed 20 years ago!

BradfordLass72. Well said!

Mymemory is not that good but I have a feeling the Leavers were asked what kind of "do" they would like at my Youngest's school. They opted for the "no-showy expensive stuff" Leavers' Party I mentioned before.

They also signed each others' shirts on the last day. It's one of the things my DD has left at my house. Among others....

Personally I finished my exams and walked away. Hated the place.

not dissimilar imo to the "buying presents for teachers" etc.
the world has gone mad.

I will join you in the miserable gits club!

End of school party only.

My two eldest the same. Youngest a "Leavers' Ball" with instructions that no expensive clothes are to be worn. Simple dresses or "best" summer clothes for girls and jacket and trousers and tie for young men, and no special transport. A very good time was had by all.

Thirdinline - totally agree, my year 11s were also far more interested in the prom than maths! It takes over the entire year.

I must admit to being relieved that both of my boys decided not to go to theirs. Most of the boys arranged their own more suitable celebration, and left the girls to it, lol.

I’m with you on that callgirl1. We left school saying goodbye to our teachers and our friends and that was it. I dread the time my DD has to prepare for a prom for my DGD as she’s already acting like a little princess!

Our kids soon leave the nest so why not.

Perhaps this is ^why not^:

I feel for single parents, or low wage families when these type of things happen.

It has all got out of hand.
But unless parents decide between themselves that enough is enough and this carries on, there may be dozens of "pre-loved" dresses and suits for sale in charity shops.

My DD spent a fortune for GD's prom .Its not as if its to be an annual event. Our kids soon leave the nest so why not.

Its gone mad. I’m just grateful that this wasnt around when my two girls were leaving school, being a single parent it would have been so stressful as I just wouldnt have had the money. I feel for single parents, or low wage families when these type of things happen.

When i left School everybody signed the shirt and we had a leavers disco

Agree Bradford Lass