Yes, the power of knowing others are going through stuff is amazing. Its one of those things that seem so obvious once you have accepted the fact that pretty much everyone around you must have 'stuff' to deal with and yet we still feel isolated in our pain. It was not until a councillor spelt it out to me that I began to understand myself more.
So many of us were brought up to put a face on and keep a stiff upper lip. Yes, those nearest to us might have an inkling but the friendly neighbour who sees you every few days has no idea.
I was sat chatting to a lady I only knew slightly (a new neighbour) when she began to explain what she was coping with and how alone she felt and how she felt just a little resentful that I always looked so cheerful. I smiled and gently told her that so many people have stuff going on - and they only really unburden themselves when they feel a real connection. I hinted at a couple of things I was dealing with and assured her that she was far from alone.
She was older than I and was dealing with a complex family but it had never dawned on her that so many people have similar issues. Days later we met up again and she thanked me for helping her understand that she was not alone - as if I had given her a huge solution to all her problems. It seemed so obvious to me....(having had the counselling, I'm suddenly an expert!!)....and now she too was beginning to see that we all have troubles. Yes, Gransnet really does help us cope a little better and I do hope it continues in it friendly and supportive way. There will always be the odd balls who like to 'stir' but thankfully most of us are old enough and wise enough not to rise to the bait.
