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Not a virtuous hobby? Guilt?

(63 Posts)
janeainsworth Tue 26-Feb-19 22:44:02

mcem Mum could only justify sitting down to watch tv if she was also knitting
Me too grin

Day6 I feel guilty spending all day working in the garden when I know MrA would prefer me to go on a bike ride with him. At least your DH’s efforts are appreciated!

Urmstongran Tue 26-Feb-19 21:30:36

Gosh I never feel guilty on my iPad or reading! My husband enjoys being ‘busy’. I don’t. Oh dear.

As we’ve been married 45 years now maybe it’s true that opposites attract?

gillybob Tue 26-Feb-19 21:25:12

You have no reason to feel guilty Day6

As you said yourself ..... He loves gardening and is never happier than when he is pottering. It's his hobby

Infact you should congratulate yourself in letting him enjoy his hobby in peace. wink

mcem Tue 26-Feb-19 20:19:14

Mum could only justify sitting down to watch tv if she was also knitting.
I've struggled to overcome the guilty conscience and am happy to say I think I've managed. Largely because, post-divorce, I am answerable to no-one but myself!

NanaandGrampy Tue 26-Feb-19 20:14:43

Not a guilty bone in my body ?

Grampy has walked the dog and spent time in the garden . I did some reading, some crafting and had a snooze!

I work on the principle as a grown man he can choose what to do with his time and likewise I get to choose what to do with mine. Works for us .

sassenach512 Tue 26-Feb-19 19:28:39

grin merlot I do the same! why do we do it? considering I cook our meals, do the washing/ironing and clean the toilet, I've nothing to feel guilty for but I make a grab for the pledge/fairy liquid whenever he comes in from the gardening.
In my defence, I had a very house-proud mother who would tut tut if she came into a room and found me reading 'Bunty' and not helping her with the chores, so it must be a built-in reflex smile

Sussexborn Tue 26-Feb-19 17:44:47

Perhaps your OH was grumpy because he overdid things! As long as you are happy and content what does it matter who does what?

merlotgran Tue 26-Feb-19 17:42:23

I don't know why I do it but whenever DH walks across the yard from his workshop I leap to my feet and make it look like I've been beavering away at the housework.

Daft really because I work my socks off so whenever I sit down I jolly well deserve it hmm.

Grandma70s Tue 26-Feb-19 17:35:01

Reading is every bit as valid an occupation as gardening. No need to apologise for reading!

sodapop Tue 26-Feb-19 17:05:24

Yes as KatyK said its swings and roundabouts. It seems though that women are programmed to feel guilty if they are having leisure time. I feel like this at times and its no fault of my husband who encourages me to relax more.

KatyK Tue 26-Feb-19 16:55:55

DH walked to the shops, made some soup then did some gardening. I changed a bed, put some washing out, then spent a few hours lying on the bed reading! Yes I do feel guilty and I'm constantly apologising to him. He just laughs and says 'relax, we're retired.' Some days I do more than him. Swings and roundabouts. Some days I feel a bit slobby but hey ho.

aggie Tue 26-Feb-19 16:37:22

I have spent most of the day speed reading a book that I promised to return ages . I didn't want to not read it , but it wasn't exactly a sparkling read . A bit of weeding and dead heading happened in between , but I do feel I wasted a day

Day6 Tue 26-Feb-19 16:33:03

I wonder if I am the only one with a ^slightly* guilty conscience.

OH has been in the garden for most of this lovely sunny day. He loves gardening and is never happier than when he is pottering. It's his hobby. I have made tea and coffee for him at intervals, thrown a load into the washing machine, hung out washing on the line and loaded the dishwasher. OH emptied the kitchen bin before he went out.

For the last hour I have been at my laptop, playing music and catching up with emails and Gransnet.

He has come in all sweaty and dirty and gone to shower. I get the impression he is slightly scowling that I have not been more productive. I am enjoying my music and writing to friends via email but now I feel I should have been feigning domestic goddessness. Our garden does look lovely because of his industry.

I haven't been a hive of industry today but is sitting at the computer enjoying music and catching up with friends justified? (I am Queen of the Guilty Conscience.)

Are some hobbies more virtuous than others?