Can I take much more?

So sorry, what a rough time you are having.xx

So sorry to hear all these troubles have landed at your feet in such a short space of time but the advice above is very good. The main priority at the moment is yourself and your husband's recovery which will take some time. Hopefully your MIL will be receiving care and have some family nearby who can reassure her. When we were struggling some years ago my MIL once said to me all this will pass and she was right.

Similar happened to my late husband and I months after we had got married, my advice is just take one day at a time, and try to eat well xx

Hello Newatthis hope life gets better soon for you.
We are all getting older, same as our relatives and friends and so these things happen more often.?

That's a lot to cope with all at once.
When my life was similar to yours someone said to me, give yourself an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening to worry and fret about it all, and then think about something else, go out, or do something,cleaning, cooking or washing and ironing.When your troubles come back I. Your head,say, I'll worry about that tonight in my hour or in the morning hour.
It really does help if you aim for that.

Hope you feel better soon Newatthis so sorry to hear all these problems have reared their ugly head all at once

Thank you Tilleybelle for praying - I do appreciate it.

Thank you for all your support. I was admitted into hospital for 4 days with the asthmatic attacks, which was when they found the clot, and therefore couldn't attend the funeral although my sister had a lot of support with friends and relatives. I only have DH here as my children do not live anywhere near me although they are on the phone each day - he is making a wonderful job looking after me. I also have had a lovely email from a friends, one of whom I hadn't heard from for a long time - she too lives far away (France) but her words were very supportive. It never rains but it pours. Hopefully it won't be too long until I'm feeling better.

My OH says we all get the same amount of trouble its just thats some of us get it all in one go.That was certainly the case for us .I'm a coper so I was fine ..until 18 months later when I fell apart at the seams as everyone else was fine.

Dont think you're being weak if you give in to a rant or a cry and please make time for yourself.Take each day as it comes and try not to look too far ahead .It will get better ,but it will be in its own time and nothing you say or do will hurry it on.Look after you first ,then you'll be fit to look after others

.My friend is a physchologist and when life was very hard for us she told me that she had spent time with Inuit women.She learned that if food was very short the women ate BEFORE the children so they would be capable of caring for their babies.If you think about it ,it does make sense so wrap yourself in some self care and be set for the folk who need you when you feel able .

Newatthis you poor love

This happened to me a while ago and somehow you find more and more strength you didn't know you had. When you come through the other side you will be a stronger person.

It's so easy to say 'see the glass half full' but not so easy when you are in the middle of such misery, especially when you are having to deal with your own health problems.

I am guessing your MIL is in hospital but you feel awful you can't travel there with your DH's health concerns plus your own.

And of course, you are dealing with bereavement too.

Life has a nasty way of chucking everything at you at once. On a nice sunny day, bored, nothing to do, and thinking 'This would be a convenient time for a crisis', is there one? No. It's just the way it is sometimes and I hope offloading how you feel here has helped. Knowing people understand and sympathise. Wishing you a good recovery and your DH too.

Sometimes it happens like this and you feel like you can't carry on, but carry on you will. Take care.

So sorry to hear about all your health related problems for you and your family. Why does everything seem to happen at once? You must be feeling very anxious at this time, so please, talk to your doctor about everything and hopefully he/she will be able to point you in the right direction to get the support you may need. And take anything and everything you are offered. Take care (flowers)

Newatthis. I am so very sorry. I can't imagine how you feel. Like everyone else, I urge you to look after yourself. Keep warm, eat as well as you can. Do not try to push yourself too much. Just do what you can and remember to rest. All this shock and grief is exhausting.
I pray you have friends nearby who can help you.
I don't know what your feelings are about religion so I hope it isn't upsetting if I say I shall pray for you and all your family. If you don't like prayer etc. I do understand.
It is a hard time of year, keep warm my love. Much love Tillyxxx

Oh dear sorry to hear.

So sorry to hear you have so much to cope with at once. Take care of yourself

So sorry to hear of all this coming at you one after another newatthis but l echo what Blubelle and Mawbroon have said.
Do try to look after yourself so that you can be a help to the family if it becomes necessary.

What a lot of worry and sorrow to be dumped on you in such a short space of time. No wonder you are feeling so down. Good advice given here though. You can do nothing for your Bil except remember him fondly and grieve with his family, and you can do little for someone 7 hours away except keep in touch. You and your husband must be your first concern. Take any help offered. I hope things will look less bleak soon.

I’m so sorry you’re having such a rotten time of it just now. Sending you lots of love and hugs. ❤️?

Sane advice GabriellaG. It’s the old glass half empty/half full situation isn’t it?
It is entirely understandable to feel that everything has turned against you, but unpicking each situation and assessing it can help to bring clarity.
Years and years ago when paw was told he needed a transplant or would be dead within 6 months, my sister in law (a GP) gently but sensibly pointed out to me that the transplant was not the problem but a solution.
Bon courage newatthis

We are supposed never to be given more than we can deal with - I don't know who said that, but it does seem to be horribly wrong so often when the great wrecking ball of life keeps hitting you hard with one thing after another. I'm so sorry to hear of the awful events that have started this year so badly for you; the advice to take care of yourself as much as you can is really wise - you need to be strong for all that has to be dealt with. Good luck. xx

Poor you it's horrible when a lot of things happen within a short time have been there, take care of yourself

You wake up one day and feel as if you have been hit by a ton of bricks. All the bricks can though be lifted though one by one. Your BiL has gone, as sad as it is, think what can you do to change this, nothing. Your DM lives so far away, and you must have foreseen that with her age, this could hapoen. Of course you will worry but again, will this change anything. Your DH has recovered and hopefully will receive all necessary medication and treatment. You have had a terrific fright discovering your embolism but it has been discovered and given treatment. Take each element if your situation and think through not what you would like to happen or do but what can and has been done in each one. You and DH are the ones you should be concentrating on.

I hope the embolism is sorted out and your DH gets his appointment soon. Then you may feel strong enough to make the journey to visit MIL. I am sorry you have your brother in law’s funeral to cope with too. Life isn’t fair as we all know.
Wishing you all the best ?

This is awful for you newatthis - troubles often come in a worrying bundle like this, I'm afraid. You may prefer to 'row your own boat' as it were but have you considered emotional support from many of our organisations? I hope your GP can refer you.
When my late DH was diagnosed with motor neurone disease it felt like our world had caved in, we were devastated but with the help of the MNDA and the local hospice we coped a bit better. There was no magic wand but knowing we had a shoulder to cry on helped a great deal. Somehow we had to find qualities which we didn't know we had. Don't be too independent - help is there but you often have to ask. My best wishes to you both.

So sad to read of the horrendous times you are experiencing. I do hope everything works out for you all. ?