It's all in the pronounciation

My daughter, 6 at the time, was going to be bridesmaid at her aunts wedding. She heard us talking about the wedding mil said "When the vicar marries C........." My daughter starting crying and saying I thought she was marrying uncle ........ not the vicar

When my daughter was 3 she loved the musical Oliver. She sang lots of the words really well, but 'It's a fine life' was always 'It's a pie life'

My DD10 did this one just last week...she had been doing her first circuits lesson in PE & told me she didn't like the Triceratops dips.

Apparently birthday cards used to come in 'envelblokes' according to DD.

I could never understand why a 'green hill' needed a city wall (not a mispronounciation) as we sang at Sunday school:
"There is a green hill far away
Without a city wall"

My daughter loved singing Christmas carols, but used to mix up the words. "Away in a manger.........'til morning is night" and "Oh Christmas Tree.......how lovely are your brown-chest" were two of our favourites. The hymn "Onward, Christian Soldiers" also made us smile, with "Christ, the Royal master leans against the phone!" (leads against the foe)

Ah the snow white anecdote reminds me of a little one acting the part of wicked step mother 'Mirror, Mirror on the wall...who is the fairy? Stuff em all'.

My daughter always sang 'Ruby don't take your gloves to town' we never told her what it should be.

My eldest son was "infested" into cubs. I had to do a lot of explaining to concerned relatives.

my daughter wanted a pram and doll fr her 4th christmas ,to avoid her knowing what she was getting we spelled it so anytime we were asked we said a R E D P R A M .On Christmas morning when Granny and Papa arrived they asked what Santa had left ...oh I got a dolly and pram she said but I never got my P R A M.
My son mixed letters up all the time ,he called Instructions ..constructions,magazines were mazagines and macaroni was mastertony we still call Lemonade imilade

My brother sang, "Once in royal david sooty stole a candle shed"

Aged two my eldest daughter told our elderly neighbour the we were going to Australia to live in a 'bunghole' - bungalow she meant. Poor man was finding it hard to keep a straight face.

A very early memory was the early evening weather forecast on the Home Service, where I wa introduced to phrases such as 'icelated showers' (why did they happen even in summer, and why had I never seen those little glittering ice crystals ... ?) and the 'arklook for tomorrow' (what Noah would see when he looked out of the Ark'). Im the six o'clock news I would then hear about 'revels' in Morocco, presumably a local independence movement of some kind, but in my mind, a group of people dancing round a bonfire on an autumn evening, silhouetted against a warm orange glow. I imagine now that the rebels must have been reported as starting a blaze, but that's just post-rationalisation!

When singing the hymn with the words ‘with grace will persevere ‘ I piped up very loudly so I’m told Sho is Percy Vere Mum!

My little sister was among the many five year olds who triumphantly sang; "Jesus bits of shine with a pure clear light"

I remembered hearing her that the hymn hadn't made any sense to me either three years earlier, when I was in what we called the baby class then.

I remember visiting an aunt when I was about 9 years old,and she asked me to pop to the corner shop for some chipolatas, I didn't really know what she meant,and came back with chips and tomatoes,cut caused a bit of a giggle

When my brother was six years old, he was to be in the choir at the harvest festival.
He insisted I listened to him practice, as he earnestly sang: “Here we come with Joycie, bringing in the sheets”

My eldest daughter, now 36, used to often spot the peasant bird in our garden. I still call pheasants this! She also knew of an undergarment called a corbit which her great grandma wore ( the corset) and loved the story of Snow White 'Mirror,mirror on the wall, who is the fairiest of us all'.

Kale: following on from the Sandra Dee lyrics, lousy with virginity, my daughter used to sing , won’t go to bed till she’s leagally fed....

Still on the religous theme, a five year old was heard singing A-weighing a major... And another asking the good Lord to 'deliver us from Eve Hill'. That's locality in the town where we live.

Love these.

This has reminded me of the ‘bibon’. When the children were toddlers we used the plastic bibs with the upturned bit to collect the dropped food. We always used to say “put your bib on” or “let me put your bib on”.

Same here Coolgran. I thought DC's school was very sophisticated when they were learning about 'cheeses' when they were only 4! 'Did you find out how cheeses were made?' I asked. 'No Mummy', came the indignant reply 'we learnt about Baby Cheeses in the stable.'

When my son was 3 or 4 my DH went on a business trip to New York. He told his teacher 'Daddy has gone on an aeroplane in 'New Shorts'! I had a vision of my, usually soberly dressed, DH boarding in a lairy pair of Bermudas, grinning Rik Mayall style!

Our dgd was about 4 when she was given a little canvas bag from Sunday School, it had a picture of a baby on the side and the words Baby Jesus. This bag hung for a long time on a coat hook at the bottom of our stairs.

Many months later dh and I were going for a short break to an apartment at a not too distant seaside town and were taking dgd with us. We prepared a box of food to take with us, milk, bread, eggs, etc etc I reminded dh not to forget the Babybel cheeses. These were a staple for dgd. I called to dh.... Don't forget the baby cheeses.

Getting into the car there it was on top of the food box, the canvas bag with Baby Jesus on the side.
It was so funny at the time, almost a pee yourself moment.

OK.... not a comment by dgc but thought it was worth a mention.

When I was about seven I spent a very short time at a convent. Not being a catholic and unfamiliar with the Hail Mary, I was convinced she was full of grapes. Well, why not when we were blessing the fruit of her womb?

When we used to say the Lord's Prayer at Infant School I thought we were going on a trip to Temptation and we were praying we got back okay.