fifty shades of dust and clutter

I have realised that I just don't see clutter. Our dining room was rearranged to accommodate the Christmas Tree. A table that normally just has a lamp acquired a plant and some fancy glasses and a photo. I thought it looked really nice and arty. I remarked to DS and he immediately said what you mean cluttered ! No hope for me even though I would like to not have to rush around before visitors arrive .

When our DC were young our house was never tidy but I always had a cleaning frenzy before my MIL visited. My Mum could never understand how I could ignore the clutter or ironing that needed doing and sit and do finger painting or storytime with the children.

Now as I write this I can see dust on the sideboard, muddy paw marks on the doors & windows, dust bunnies around the edges of the wood floors and dog hair on the sofas. Am I bothered, not a bit. It will all be dealt with when I have nothing interesting to do. Our home is livably clean it's not a show home. I no longer try to impress visitors, they have to take us as we are.

well for a start , i would leave his things where he leaves them ,DONT tidy up after him. when he says wheres my whatever. tell him its where he left it and walk out of the room.or you could build a little summer house in the garden and either he or you can retire to it. ... i like a bit of clutter its makes the home a home. not a show room... but each to what they fancy.

This thread is so reassuring. It's good to share.
Yes a tidy house means a tidy mind ( for some)
Decluttering is good.
A cleaner if you can afford it is great idea.
But...Most important..we are only here once. No point in a spotless room if you don't get to read that pile of books, paint that picture, or whatever else you would like to do.

I used to be really tidy until I met my other half - he can turn a room from tidy to tip in 10 minutes flat! Over the years I've learned to relax and care less about cleaning and tidiness - in other words our flat varies from somewhat clean and tidy to complete tip, depending if I can be arsed to do anything about it. Obviously kitchen and bathroom are kept reasonably clean but the living room looks - lived-in - and the bedroom is an absolute tip, junk piled everywhere

As a young mum, the house was hygienic but I used to tidy up the clutter any time we expected visitors. Then a relative pointed out a cobweb on a very high light shade despite making no comments on how nice the house looked otherwise. I gave up making a special effort for visitors then and only ever did it for us. Now the dust waits for the cleaner . lincolnimp how much nicer your house must look with all the children's things around. I'm sure you'll miss it.

We are coming to the end of 32 years as Foster Carers, which means we have had little children in the house for 41 years.
The only time any of it looks pristine is when SWs are due to visit
My OH is also a hoarder so between children and him I have no chance
It is clean where it needs to be, but-the rest is as it is---I have better things to do than constantly clean.
However, we are beginning to declutter (when I say we I actually mean I) ready to move when the last little one leaves us.
I suspect I still won't get that pristine house, not while my OH is around, and the DGC visit

I used to keep a clean, but slightly cluttered look when the kids were young. Then, after my first marriage broke down I had a clean but tidier home, I lived alone in a flat. I used to have my little ‘piles’ of stuff dotted about. But I knew where everything was and had so much storage it was brilliant. Then I met my second hubby who is so untidy it beggars belief. He just doesn’t see mess, it drives me mad. But I have learnt to relax a bit re having a tidy house, but if it gets too bad, then I flip. When my house gets too bad, then my mind gets full too, if that makes sense.

But, I can guarantee when my house looks like a tip, that’s when someone will turn up!

The link comes up if I look at this thread.
I haven't opened it yet.

Manana

I just looked at the link for Marie Kondo on GN. It didn't impress me especially the bit about sorting photos. I am currently trying to sort our family collection I inherited from my mum. MK tells you to hold each photo and ask if it makes you happy. None of mine make me happy, some of them drive me mad, some make me sad because of mum,some just mistify me because I don't know who they are. Mum would never sort them and I think I know why!! It's impossible!

We moved house last August into a bigger house than we had .reason being there wasn't a lot on the market but fell in love with the house. OMG so much more housework . However good sense has prevailed and a cleaner is on the horizon.

Yes, lesleyanne9 I've just started watching the new Marie Kondo series on Netflix. I began with the programme about the empty nester couple. It was lovely to see how much "lighter" and happier they looked at the end of the process.

I started de-cluttering before Christmas and sold things if I'm allowed to say, on Ebay but haven't got very far yet in cleaning up. Empty boxes here and everywhere that have to be out for the recycling on Tuesday. My bedroom(known as the shed) has everything in bags all over the floor. We had planned to get stuff I'd boxed up put into the attic today but it's not happened. I hate all the clutter, so I shall feel better when I get back in order. I used to be so tidy but as I've got older, I feel sometimes that I can't be bothered. In the better weather I'd rather be out doing the work in the garden than housework. As the saying goes, a clean and tidy house is the sign of a wasted life and I agree with that. We're only here once as far as we know so don't forget to enjoy life. I aim to get organised while we're in the winter months and to enjoy the rest of the year.

My husbands aunt was a bit of a slob but everyone loved meeting in her house for a cuppa and a chat. It was so cheerful and homely. No one cared.

I would like that too Petunia but at 67 I don't have the energy. There are no dirty cupboards, drawers, or dusty corners. fridge is cleaned regularly as is oven, kitchen, bathroom.. I love a clean tidy house (always been a bit too obsessed with it to be honest). But its impossible to keep it tidy and have time to enjoy yourself.
I can't bear the thought of becoming an old person living in a smelly old dusty house and I don't want to be seen in that way. I don't want to be sick and my children discovering places not clean. So its important to keep doing it and not let standards slip. I'm about to employ a cleaner as I have M.E. On top of being older it makes having a clean house very difficult.
It's a nuisance. But has to be done. I'm sure I could survive with lower standards. But that's me. Oh to be a happy slob! Or super rich and never have to lift a finger. (and I won't mention the RF)

Massive relief to see myself here in several respects!

We tend to invite people around for lunch/dinner once a month which ensures a good clean and declutter in the sitting room. We have a spare room to use as an office but we keep using the dinning table, hence the ice of aper, laptop, map, fruit bowl glasses and hairbrush

Reading through this thread I feel very lucky. I am an anxious, worry wart who has to have things looking neat, beautiful and elegant to feel calm and happy.

And I managed to find a DH who is just the same.

I use my housework, ironing and gardening as my fitness workout and do them (with DH’s help) in the mornings. So I am ‘the servants’ in the a.m

After lunch I am the Dowager Countess of Downton in my neat, elegant mansion and engage in many pursuits with the DH. I walk, cook, engage with Mr Interverse, read and so on.

It seems like quite a good balance.

My daughter, who is not OCD about cleaning and tidying like me, visited this morning and commented yet again about how sparkling and neat the place was, ‘ like a hotel.’

As I write this to you husband is siting at dining table cluttered with tax receipts doing yearly tax returns. Promised last year he'd do it monthly(I did offer) again now adding and finding receipts etc he is the most untidy man I've ever met but he's not going to change so I just hum and ha and shut the door as I go to work.some things we have to endure I just tidy around him.

Separated at birth?
I just looked round- the dining room table has my painting things on it, one of the chairs has a pile of old photos I am sorting. The settee has a pile of books I'm reading next to it and a bag with my knitting. The box of christmas dekkies is sitting in the corner, waiting to go upstairs.
I could out-clutter anyone!

Trisher ,Hi , I did'nt know I was a twin.

We took the Christmas decs down yesterday (Saturday) cleaned the living thoroughly you know pulling out furniture etc. Today bathroom has been cleaned sparkling.
Tackled gd room but that’s the room that will end up like a pit as soon as she comes home, shoes coats makeup all strewn about, hey ho that’s life.

One of me dearest friends died at the age of 98 a couple of years ago. She once gave me a fridge magnet which said “interesting people do not have tidy homes” ... says it all about her home and mine!!

What a good reply HurdyGurdy❗️

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