NEVER EVER AGAIN!

I think Christmas work parties are overrated I found when I organized them everyone was all for them when first mentioned but as the date came closer all kinds of excuses were given for people to drop out I do think in some circumstances people are pushed into saying they will attend for fear of being thought anti social where I work one person does the organising moans how stressful it is then expects a medal for doing it

I haven’t organised a Christmas work do, however I was a school chef. Oh my goodness getting the replies in for that still brings me out in a cold sweat ! The meat order had to be by November. In the end you would ask the teachers, oh yes the replies are in my desk? it used to be a nightmare. As cooking for about 400 .

phoenix You definitely have my sympathy - been there many times from organising office parties, to private parties, to parties for the mother-and-toddler-group, etc etc .... and each time have sworn never again!

However, your post has done me the world of good today because I was tempted to arrange a coach outing for my art group to an arts centre 30 miles away but you have reminded me how awful it can be. The last coach outing I arranged, some elderly ladies (by which I mean older than me) wandered off and got lost with their phones switched off, and I had to spend an hour trying to find them in a town I didn't know whilst placating the coach driver and the rest of our group who kept complaining about having to wait.

Having read your tale of woe, I have decided I've done my bit over the years and I will forget my prospective coach trip.

Well, we've had the event, and I'm even more determined not to do it next year, or if I do, then not to go to it!

The person that was supposed to be sharing a taxi back with me swanned out of the restaurant throwing a casual " see you at Wetherspoons " over her shoulder!

Oh no you wont! I'm tired and I want to go home, and preferably without having to walk through town to the taxi rank on my own and paying all of the fare!

Fortunately a couple who had travelled together were still there, and offered me a lift.

I thought I'd better make sure that T was ok for a transport, so duly trotted across the road to Wetherspoons to check. There she was holding a very large Scotch and soda and when I asked she blithely told me that she was going to squeeze in with L & C! Just as well that J&N had hung on to wait while I checked.

And I will refrain from mentioning that when I went to settle the bar bill, I'm pretty certain that I ended up paying her share as well as mine grrrrr.

Oh yes the dreaded spreadsheet because nobody ever remembers what they ordered.
Sorry Phoenix but the transport thing made me chuckle, so typical of people who are thought less.

Seems parties are the same wherever and whatever age you are. This year I organised the one we have annually after the committee meeting. All has to be done by email, so a lot of nagging involved to find out who is coming. Then more nagging because having paid the deposits out of my own bank account, they don't seem to see any urgency to reimburse me.

Then you have to get their choices out of them and let the restaurant know. Then let the restaurant know that some people have cried off, and also what it was they had chosen to eat. This is balanced out by the Chair inviting any speakers coming to the meeting if they would like to come along to the dinner too. More conversations with the long suffering restaurant.

We squash around the table with elbows touching, and bottles of wine keep appearing, ordered by the group at the other end. Referral to the list to remind people what they have ordered, to stop the veggie options being taken by others who like the look of them better than their own choice.

The cracker fiasco, with tacky plastic bits flying into people's eyes, and the ritual reading of the jokes, why do they only seem to have a choice of three in the entire box, and each person feels they have to read out the same joke over again?

And then there is the bill. Heaven help us if they decide to calculate and pay for what they have actually eaten, rather than splitting it, and of course some only had one glass of wine and others a whole bottle. The total finally produced never matches the sum required and often the organiser end up making up the difference.

To cap it all this year, they managed to go home in the wrong coats!!

Thankfully I was spared the "choosing your meal" ordeal ( one year my boss had pre ordered the salmon, then changed his mind and swiped someone's beef ) as we went to the Italian Kitchen in Bideford who offer a set "sharing" menu for parties of 4 or more.

Highly reccommended, btw, good food and plenty of it, in fact almost too much!

Our company do was last night and my husband organised it and the usual..I don't want that although I ordered it in September..the lovely African carers turning up an hour after the start, looking gorgeous but wondering why their meal wasn't fresh and hot...moan moan moan yet lovely venue and all free. He missed most of his meal because seeing to others and we had to stay until the end to pay the bill when we were both knackered, anyway everyone had fun!

I work with 4 guys and a younger girl. I have always done the Xmas night out, till last year was fed up with the guys wives and younger girls boyfriend dictating when and where we could have our night out. They also seemed to store up their years drinking cause it was all free. Was almost always at a local restaurant which I never seemed to get my meal or drinks along with everyone else. We all decided (me) that last year we would just do lunch for the workers on last day we were working. 2 of the wives "just turned up" and moaned the whole time at being done out of a night out, I was raging.!!

Next year organize a cold buffet meal with lots of choice, that way you don't need to worry about dietary requirements, just as the caterer to include some vegetarian dishes and halal chicken.

Print a deadline, and refuse to accept cancellations or people who suddenly can come after that date. If anyone cancels after that date, send them a bill for the food that was prepared for them.

In other words, stop being so nice.

I had a similar thing when I took over the running of the department's lottery syndicate. I warned them in advance that I am an absolute WITCH when it comes to things like this and that I would "take no crap from no one". They had been used to paying late if they had "forgotten", and the organiser would put in for them, etc.

Not with me.

Every month, I send out an email on payday (so no one can say they've no money at the moment) telling them how much they need to pay, and the date by which they need to pay (I collect the money monthly).

And that's they only notification they get. No late payments accepted, no money "put in" for those for forgot, or just didn't bother, to pay.

If they don't pay, they don't play. And if they don't play, they don't share in the winnings. We save our winnings up to share out in the second week of December, and when I hand out the spreadsheet showing what each member's share is, there were a few sullen faces when they missed out on a month's share during the year.

But tough. I warned them in advance, so no come back.

The first couple of years were a bit sticky, and when I refused to accept late payments a couple of times there were grumblings. But they soon learned, and it all runs very smoothly now.

I'd be doing the same in organising a Christmas do.

One email telling them THIS is where we are going, THIS is the date, THIS is the time, and THIS is what your contribution will be. We will be sorry if you can't make it and you will be missed, but this is the arrangement, like it or lump it. And a follow up email two weeks before the date, saying "you've not paid. If you want to come, you have seven days in which to pay me, or your place will be cancelled". And cancel it. And stick to your guns.

You can please all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time, so I would just work to that principle. If people don't like it, they are welcome to take over the organisation at any time!

it brings it all back. Use to work for a very large firm in the marketing department and had to organise many do's for all sorts of reasons all paid for either by the firm or our media people. Once I even had to organise two do's on the same night at different venues. Added to it was usually the need to book accommodation for up to 50 people. Nightmare.

Reading some of your responses, it looks like I get off lightly! The firm only pay for food, drinks are down to the guests. If people want to bring partners, they have to pay for their food.

At my last "proper" job, the boss invited partners, all drinks were included and taxis/minibuses were laid on! Fortunately, his PA was given the task of organising it all.z

Many companies no longer organise a Christmas "do" for the staff due to all the problems involved. My own company have followed the above policy for a number of years.

As an alternative we give a "Christmas Box" on top of the profit sharing bonus they receive (quarterly for operational staff and half yearly for admin staff) and those that are working on the last day prior to Christmas we invite to the pub for a drink when the offices closes.

The above seems to go down far better than any function organised, as any member of staff can do as they please with the extra money given. The informal gathering at the pub also always goes down well as all have the Christmas and end of year spirit. There is also the benefit that everybody can sit or stand with whoever they wish.

Far better.

Where I last worked our end of term staff do was a “ bring and share” buffet. A bit hit and miss. Then we had a new Head, who saw that nobody had time or energy at the end of term to make anything or remember to buy and bring things, so thereafter she ordered in a hot meal of pie and peas ( this was Yorkshire after all ) from a catering firm. We had to sign up by two days before and paid about £3 on the day. Job done!
Everyone brought drinks, but as most of us were driving it was mainly soft drinks, though some brought beers. If smaller groups chose to go out for a meal they just arranged it among themselves with no fuss. Easy.
Where I do voluntary work now, we have a signing up list and people offer to bring buffet food, mostly bought, as nobody has time to bake or prepare stuff. There will be a meal out in the New Year for those who want it. No hassle.

Arranging an office Christmas do is bad enough but trying to arrrange an "ex-pat" one is hell on earth. We aren't ex-pats but immigrants but that doesn't stop some of them being all superior. It was supposed to be a lunch for about 10 people who lunch together once a month but a guy took it upon himself to invite other people including one who really wasnt welcome. So all my friend's hard work came to nothing and it has been cancelled.

I haven't organised a lunch or dinner, but I organised a trip for elderly people at the day centre I run. First, it had to be somewhere that's:

wheelchair-user friendly.
has toilets suitable for disabled people.
is on the flat, so no hill, steps or escalators.
Somewhere not too far (time restrictions)
Not too expensive.
Has a restaurant/cafe.
Is under cover, in case of bad weather.

Then:
I had to book 2 minibuses, work out a reasonable cost to each person.

It ended up with 15 people!
One was having his legs dressed by the nurse
One had a bladder infection
3 chose to go elsewhere instead.
One had a Smart meter fitted that day
One was out when we went to collect him!
One was having her hair done!
One decided, on the day, she didn't want to go.
One had visitors on the day, so stayed at home with them.

Those that DID go enjoyed it - apart from one lady, who moaned that she didn't like the weather!

There's just no pleasing some people!

www.reshareworthy.com/spoof-emails-capture-chaos-of-planning-christmas-office-party/

That was very good knickas!

[tcggrin]

If I were you Phoenix I definitely wouldn't do it again and I'd stick to my guns. I used to organise lottery tickets for the department Hurdygurdy and could have done with taking a tough stance like yours.

knickas63 Love it!!! I'm going to print it off and post it next to my computer so that I am never tempted to organise an outing again!

Organising works "Do`s" is like pushing butter up a hedgehogs bum with red hot needle.
As my Grandmother used to say.

Am presently organising this for a very large WI group, and yes, never again! [
The phrase ‘herding cats’ that somebody has used upthread is very, very apt.
It will be a miracle if it all runs to plan.

....and it's been my experience that no one even says thanks!