Soop's welcoming and supportive kitchen

tanith and aggie so sorry for your loss. maw my dear SIL is sorting out my brother's clothes too. It must be so hard for you. I'm not very good with words. I do feel it inside but I don't seem to be able to express my feelings in words that others seem to find to show sympathy and empathy. for you all.

Maw Tanith Aggie

try again

I am not a huggy person , but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate virtual hugs , so [flowers ] for everyone with thanks and love xxx

Thank you Bellanonna and Jalima it was too painful to talk about while he was so sick and after he died, thankfully peacefully at home. It was a long few months but with enormous support from family and the wonderful Marie Curie nurses we managed to make his last days as happy and comfy as it could be.
But as hard as it was it was nothing compared to how hard it is to be the one left behind.

Maw so sorry you have encountered another thing which made you feel so sad. I don't think it ends, it just changes. It's the 'first' of everything which is so difficult as my sis-IL said after DB died.

And Tanith I'm so sorry, I didn't realise you had been bereaved too, I did know your DH was poorly but had no idea.

Aggie too

Tanith, I’m so sorry. I had no idea that you’d lost your husband recently. Condolences and a hug.

Had to add a warm welcome to Grandmashe43 and send hugs to Aggie x
Jud that is a very special photo. I love it.

Oh aggie I am sorry! I meant to include you in my special hugs.

Firstly, my biggest hugs today for you Maw and Tanith. It must be so dreadfully sad and life changing to lose a loved husband of many years. The grief, I am sure, can never go away and clothes and prized possessions can only be painful memories. Also hugs for you Ann60 who has been slowly losing your husband over the last few years. Finding out that my previously strong, healthy husband is no longer strong and healthy has been a bit of a wake up for me, that we are not going to be together forever. Salutary reminder

Panache I share your sleep problem. Lucky if I have managed more than 4 hours the last 3 nights and I feel so exhausted!

Morethan it must be heartbreaking to watch your lovely DIL trying to keep cheerful while feeling so unwell. We can all only hope that Christmas can be a good family time with memories you can all keep.

soop how talented you are to produce paintings of that quality at your first try. I can't draw or paint or craft or anything creative at all! Yet my dad was an art teacher. He tried and failed dismally to teach me!

I have found a photo of new grandpuppy and DGS2: so cute!

Roast chicken dinner for us tonight too. Off to put the roasties in the oven.

I am about to log off until tomorrow. Feet up time. Sunday paper awaits. G&T at six o'clock sharp.

Thank you for your company.

I've looked for a photo of the gate. Cannot locate it. It was similar to the following, only less dramatic.

Yes. My very first flower painting. Now framed. The absolute first painting that I did was of a wee gate leading into a wood. The artist who lived in our village in Cornwall remarked...it's a good naive interpretation...

tanith aggie Maw You are wonderful ladies. In fact, all our lot are the best. Thank you for your insight into the complex world of dealing with bereavement and dementia and all things that we hardly give a thought to when we are young and fit.

tanith I'm reading The Midnight Line , a Jack Reacher novel. Love Lee Childs. Especially Jack Reacher.

soop, what a bright, happy picture of those primulas. An amazing first attempt! You must have a very good eye for shape, form and colour. I hesitate even to draw a stick person.
Didn't notice it was raining! But now my washing is back in the machine for another spin before it all migrates to the tumble drier.

Thank you Maw ?

Dear Maw, thank you so much for sharing your grief. My darling sister lost her beloved husband in June, I know she is heartbroken but never really shows just how much. I may sound so selfish but I certainly don’t mean too, but hearing how you are coping gives me an insight to her suffering, and I hope I can help her even just a little.
I know how much you loved and cared for your darling man,as did my sister.
Hope this makes sence, my thoughts are with you, thanks x

soop my first painting is definitely not for showing , those primulas are lovely and deserves it place on the wall

My condolences tanith
There is no easy way to do these things and actually no compulsion to do them at all, at least not before you feel ready.
My only advice is do not worry one bit about possibly upsetting other people
Your feelings are the ones which matter.
Take your time. Nobody will hassle you but I recognise the desire to pass on something meaningful to somebody who will appreciate it.
But take your time

Ann you are so brave , things will be better when you can spend time when it suits , with OH rather than watching for what will happen next

reading maws post resonates with me , I am now sleeping in the room Jim slept in in a Hospital bed , because "my" room is now for visitors , who could not envisage being in "his " room . I waken in the night and wonder if this is what he heard /saw , the creaks and groans and the odd lorry trundling past , the morning light creeping through the cracks in the curtains and have a wee weep . Daytime is different , not necessarily better , but different

Soop I agree with Charleygirl that Painting is so pretty I too would love to try again but I already know I’d be rubbish at it. Was it seriously your first effort ? I’m impressed.
I’ve just had a ham roll sat in the garden reading it’s glorious in the sun but chilly out of it, it’s another Jack Reacher Soop but I’ve only just realised I’ve read this one before ‘61 Hours’ is the title I love this series but I should of kept a check of which ones I’ve read.

I’m newly widowed and now on this road that Maw and other’s have been on a while it’s not easy. This morning I’d arranged to go pick up Rays bowls bag from one of his fellow bowlers, she kindly went and retrieved it from the ‘hut’ as she had a key and kept it till I was ready to get it, well I’m not ready and suppose no one ever is but I went and we had an hours reminisce about Ray and both ended up blubbing?. Now I have to sort out the mess I created by offering his bowls and equipment to be donated to a new bowler who might need equipment and then have his brother ask me if he could have them ? someone is going to be disappointed.
I can’t even contemplate the whole ‘wardrobe’ thing yet Maw I’m encouraged by your posting, which I try to keep up with, that I will cope better as time passes

Sorry I’ve written a novel I’m off to read and try and nap as I doubt I got 4hrs last night Charleygirl!!

I just popped into what I thought was the Kitchen to discover a completely new room! I haven’t been here to peep around the door lately to see what’s going on as I’ve been away for a few days away at the Motorhome and Caravan show at the NEC looking at things we can’t afford. We also visited Kenilworth and wandered around Warwick and ate too much!

I’ve been back to speed read the few days before you all up and moved kitchen and feel very blessed that I’ve been able to gad off like that. Healing Hugs to Maw, Morethan you of course Soop and anyone else I can get my rather too cuddly arms around.

Heartfelt hugs and much love fleeing in the direction of ourMaw and Morethan.......indeed to all truly feeling the heavy weight on their shoulders this day.

Whilst so pleased I inadvertently brought a rare smile to your lips Ann............of course I know what you mean however I would also hasten to add there are very many getting "hitched" at middle age, because the 50`s today is not at all considered "past it" .............so you may still need to find that wedding ensemble my friend!!

Please do not "rub it in" Charley.............many of us could well do with just a snippet of your sleeps!

Hope for some of us re garding artistic talent then it seems,however I think that firmly rules me out of the frame Soop!!

I must away to attend to the pussy cat painting. There are plenty of comfortable chairs in our kitchen. Please relax and enjoy a pleasant afternoon.

Pork crackling! Yes please...I assume it's calorie-free.