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Save the date cards - really?

(39 Posts)
Antonia Thu 12-Apr-18 18:11:29

Nearly every recent wedding we have been to has been preceded by a save the date card, often very many months before an actual invitation arrived. Is it just me, or do I see these cards as simply one more expense driven by stationery companies? Wouldn't you save the date anyway when you get an invitation? I do see the logic in that it might mean you adjust holiday dates or other commitments, but as DH says, it also gives you a cast iron excuse to avoid the wedding by arranging in good time to be away!

grannyactivist Sun 15-Apr-18 23:47:57

I'm always glad to receive a STD card as my diary gets booked up well in advance and The Wonderful Man's even more so. I suppose it could be a problem if the event was one that people wanted to get out of; although it can happen that people do have bookings well in advance. I got a STD card in January for a July wedding and already had something in my diary for that date!! (Which I will have to cancel now.)

grannyticktock Sun 15-Apr-18 22:08:34

Well, that would certainly grab the attention of your potential guests, if the email was headed "STD notification"!

Izabella Sun 15-Apr-18 13:01:34

STD =. Sexually transmitted disease.

cornishclio Sun 15-Apr-18 12:46:59

We have received save the date cards/emails for many weddings/celebrations which are organised usually a year in advance. It is useful as we know to avoid certain dates when booking holidays etc.

We have sent an email ourselves for my DHs 60th birthday in October. When people lead busy lives it helps to know much earlier than 6 or 8 weeks in advance which is usually when invites go out. Also if we need to book accommodation or relatives/friends need to book time off work it helps to have as much notice as possible.

glammanana Sun 15-Apr-18 12:40:09

Such a good idea imo,we had save the date card sent for DSs wedding in LV we where able to book the Hotel at really good prices a year ahead and had plenty of time to save extra cash.

GrandmaMoira Sun 15-Apr-18 10:18:46

We got save the date cards from my nephew one year before the wedding. It meant that my shift working DS was able to arrange time off work to be there. My other nephew and a niece sent wedding invites three months before the wedding and the shift worker could not re-arrange his work so could not attend.

janeainsworth Sun 15-Apr-18 10:08:32

Maggie What can you mean? STD stands for Subscriber Trunk Dialling, doesn’t it??grin

Situpstraight Sun 15-Apr-18 09:51:13

We have only ever received one, probably as our next swathe of marriages will be GCs or Gnieces/nephews.

The one we received was from a friends son, a few months later that date was cancelled and we received another STD (?) card and then later on the whole thing was cancelled and they split up!

Maggiemaybe Sun 15-Apr-18 09:47:03

Great idea, imho, but I’m not sure about calling them STD cards. wink

Iam64 Sun 15-Apr-18 09:35:38

I'm another supporter of 'save the date' cards, facebook messages or emails.
Most of the young people I know made their own 'save the date' cards. Weddings are often booked 2 years in advance these days, so pre-warning is a good idea.
Join in the positives, there are enough serious things going on for us to worry about.

Humbertbear Sun 15-Apr-18 09:03:26

We are celebrating our Golden Wedding Anniversary today with a party and as soon as the venue was booked we sent out ‘save the day’ emails. It gave one couple the opportunity to book cheaper flights from the States and saved our closest friends from missing the party because they were planning a trip. Everyone is so busy these days that 6 weeks notice of an event is too short but we thought that sending out invitations 8 months in advance but might be a little premature.

SueDonim Fri 13-Apr-18 16:04:19

grin Ziggy!

Ziggy62 Fri 13-Apr-18 15:54:15

we sent save the date bookmarks for our wedding in 2016. We decided to marry on a Friday and thought by letting people know the date 6months before they could organise time off work , plus we had family & friends travelling from another country so they had flights to book. By choosing bookmarks I thought they were useful as well. Accidently ordered far too many and so will never need to ever buy another book mark lol

SueDonim Fri 13-Apr-18 15:02:24

I've remembered, too, that when my Dd sent out save the date cards, we heard back from some that they wouldn't be able to attend and so we were able to invite others who we hadn't previously had room for.

Her husband-to-be, like my dd, is one of four children and he has sixteen aunts and uncles and almost 40 cousins, so spaces were at a premium!

gummybears Fri 13-Apr-18 14:11:32

I didn't bother since I would have been happy for 80% of the invitees not to turn up. Just as well since thanks to MIL's tantrums, the date was changed twice and the venue once in the six months beforehand...

stella1949 Fri 13-Apr-18 13:47:58

I like them . My daughter used them, and the stationer included them as an extra item at very little cost. They came with a fridge magnet, and it meant that their friends had several months warning instead of the usual six weeks. It's a " yes" from me.

Witzend Fri 13-Apr-18 12:22:43

My dd sent out save the date emails IIRC - a new thing to me at the time - but since it was a summer date and she was inviting a lot of people who were very widely scattered, would often be coming a long way and would need to book accommodation well in advance, it seemed only sensible.
Equally she had attended many friends' weddings far away.

She soon followed up save the date with invitations that included a lot of info on travel and where to stay etc. Evidently appreciated, since the vast majority of the invitees did come. And a very good 'do' it was, too.

Auntieflo Fri 13-Apr-18 08:58:04

We had a Save the Date, handmade variety, sent to us when our grandchild was due !

travelsafar Fri 13-Apr-18 07:59:52

i would hate to be planning a wedding thesedays.Ther is so much that is 'expected' to be done. We had friends years ago who married then we all went back to her parents house for a buffet and sing along, great fun. My first marriage was a church one and we used the local school hall for the reception. A buffet done by caterers with a bar and a group who played music. It was so simple to organise compared to all the hassle, expectations and expense now adays.

JackyB Fri 13-Apr-18 07:18:29

I agree - they're a good idea, and you can't ask everyone involved personally what date would suit - so let them know just the date well in advance, taking the stress out of planning the finer details which can then be included in the "official" invitation.

In normal circumstances, however,I would still expect that the closest family have been consulted before picking the date and sending out "Save the Date" notices.

Gerispringer Fri 13-Apr-18 02:24:32

It’s a thumbs up from me too. Useful if the wedding is a distance from you and you’d need to organise travel / accommodation. An email or postcard is fine. Doesn’t have to involve any / much expense.

SueDonim Thu 12-Apr-18 21:57:35

We've just had a Save the Date for a joint 70th birthday party in September. The senders know we all lead busy lives and so wanted to forewarn folks in plenty of time. I'm grateful for their thoughtfulness as it means I can plan not to be away when the party takes place.

My own Dd sent out Save The Date cards, too, for her wedding. They were old-fashioned brown card luggage tags with their names and the date on, finished off with a ribbon and cost a tiny amount extra with the invitations.

maryeliza54 Thu 12-Apr-18 21:56:21

They are brilliant ideas - life is far too complex these days to only give people 6 weeks notice - especially if it’s a summer wedding and there’s holidays in the mix. I’m going to a wedding in August in a very tourist area and because I had the STD card months ago I was able to book a lovely cottage very near the venue. It’s very thoughtful to give lots of notice - if it’s booked you might as well tell people and avoid disappointment. The bride for this one used paper luggage labels but I agree emails would be fine these days

ffinnochio Thu 12-Apr-18 21:56:08

I’ve just received a ‘save the date’ notification by email. No cost involved and it’s in the diary. smile

grannyticktock Thu 12-Apr-18 21:49:06

It doesn't have to be expensive - an email could would do. When a wedding is arranged many months in advance, it's useful to know the date so that you don't book holidays etc that clash.