OK, who's got it?

I've been reminded of this old chestnut, which I'm sure you all will have seen before, but it still makes me chuckle...

Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian’s mother couldn’t help but notice how beautiful Brian’s roommate Jennifer was. Brian’s Mom had long been suspicious of the platonic relationship between Brian and Jennifer, and this had only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Brian and Jennifer than met the eye.
Reading his mom’s thoughts, Brian volunteered, ‘I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you Jennifer and I are just roommates.’
About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian saying, ‘Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?’
Brian said, ‘Well, I doubt it, but I’ll send her an e-mail just to be sure.. So he sat down and wrote:
Dear Mom,
I’m not saying that you ‘did’ take the gravy ladle from the house, I’m not saying that you ‘did not’ take the gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love, Brian
Several days later, Brian received an email back from his mother that read:
Dear Son,
I’m not saying that you ‘do’ sleep with Jennifer, I’m not saying that you ‘do not’ sleep with Jennifer. But the fact remains that if Jennifer is sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.
Love, Mom

I lost or mis-laid I thought, my Sabatier paring knife on Christmas Eve ... you know the one folks... the one you use for absolutely every job in the kitchen!!! The one you can’t be without!! I asked my husband I’d he’d seen it ...some hope as he never helps with preparing dinner. He was ‘busy’ he said cleaning a gummed up lawn mower !?! I really missed my knife all over the holidays, apart from it ruining my set...the block looked very odd. I found it today...in the garage...with the mower... stuck in the dried up grass ...WITH THE POINTED END BROKEN OFF!!!! Is it grounds for divorce Gransnetters??

Found it! Now, who would have thought anyone would put a photo frame in with her summer shoes? Oops

Are you sure, Twopence, that the one dessert spoon hasn't shrunk due to too much washing over the years?

Not likely, I admit, as Woolie's best usually lasted well!

I haven’t lost anything (so far) but keep discovering things I forgot to bring out - baklava, biscuits, mince pies, chocolates. I know what you’re all thinking - I’ll never lose those pounds I put on over Christmas if I have to eat my way through that lot!

Since moving house with an interim of two years with things in storage, I have been unable to find the following:

A box of dolls' house furniture which had been kept as part of our Christmas decorations for use by a family of elves.

A wire mesh tray for cooling baking, plus various other kitchen utensils which were in use practically until removal day and thus packed in one of the last boxes to leave our flat.

A record player, which was too big to go into the box with the rest of the stereo equipment, plus various other items that went into that box - posters in cardboard containers etc. two sets of LED fairly lights etc.

However, three days before Christmas the box with the dollls' house furniture turned up, among the decorations in a box that had been mislabelled as outdoor decorations.
So my faith in the good St Anthony of Padua plus St. Rita of Cascia (patrons of lost things, and for St. Anthony most suitably postal services,) has revived and I am looking forward to some of the other things appearing shortly.

It'll keep until next year, Nanny!

I've just found my Turkey foil. It was in the car boot behind the spare tyre. Haha yayyy.

I gained a Tupperware box and a baking tray. I also unearthed the special named cards I’d ordered for two dgc as they have
Scots names. Found them when looking for ds’s birthday card which I didn’t find.......

Found recently - my 16yearold grandson's phone, lost when he was 14..... it was in my couch! He was so convinced he lost it outside......

But other things remain vanished.

We did discover two very nice woolly hats, two woolly scarves (ditto) and one black glove on our coat rack last Spring clean. Nobody's claimed them, so I've been wearing them lately (not the OJ glove, obviously). DD2 did tell me the other day that one of the hats is a man's.

I've lost my favourite boots! Actually a couple of weeks before Christmas...I didn't wear them because of the few days snow we had, and now cannot find them anywhere! I do hope they did not end up in the Charity Shop, they were new this year! I am hoping they will turn up when the family returns to Oz in a couple of weeks. DH and SiL also lost six special beers bought for DD2's boyfriend - they are nowhere to be found, think they just forgot to load them into the car outside the brewery shop! So if anyone sees 6 stray beers or some tan leather ankle boots (size 6!) please let me know.

We bought a tin of chocolate biscuits but it’s disappeared! Anyone found it??

I thought about starting this thread myself. I love The Shepherds Farewell which was on a cassette (!). It was never available on CD (well the version I liked) until, to my delight I saw it when buying another CD. I got it home, wrapped the other as a gift for DH. I planned to play it all over Christmas but I have never seen it since I got it home! Where can it be?!!

The key to our safe went missing a few months ago. We searched high & low. About 6 weeks had gone by, we were both standing at the front gate, when our next-but-two neighbour came along to show us her new puppy. She gave her to me for a cuddle, & then said 'Oh, that's an old key, isn't it', bent down & picked up the safe key from the mud just outside the gate.

I haven’t lost anything, but I’ve gained a pair of scissors. They just appeared on the dining room table. i’ve asked everyone who visited over Christmas but nobody claims to own them. Weird!

So many things vanish in this house. We search for days and cannot find them. Then weeks later they are found in the place they should have been. I am sure there is something playing games with us. I once searched the house for over two years for the adaptor for a water feature I have, and had completely given up all hope, then one day opened the drawer where it had been to find it sitting there. I admit that time I was really spooked, because the drawer had been almost empty every time it was searched, and everything taken out of it quite a few times.

My husband is Morfar to his little Danish grandson and daughter. As I'm their step-grandmother, my step-daughter asked what they would call me if they were in Britain, so now I'm Nana!

When we got married 51 years ago I bought some "everyday" cutlery from Woolworths, including 4 dessert spoons and 4 teaspoons. It has used ever since but during the last 25 or so years for some reason we now have 3 dessert spoons and 5 teaspoons!!!

the remote for my Sky television in the bedroom been missing for days - eventually found it this morning down the side of the bed (not my side!!).

Farmor15 are you a Danish Granny? I'm a Farmor too and DH a Farfar. Just love it!

I still have a scarf (touch wood) that I have left three times and lost - and people have sent or given it back!

I hope that isn't Famous Last Words....

I gave up on buying presents throughout the year because I couldn't remember where they were. My cousin, all smug, said I should do what she does and put them in a box marked "Presents"...... this year she couldn't find it. As she lives in Montreal she couldn't see my quiet little smile.

Re the disappearing teaspoons, I seem to remember something about every time you lose one you should check your wardrobe, because they metamorphose into wire coat hangers (and of course no-one ever actually buys those).

Boxing Day I managed to lose the posh plug to the kitchen sink, no cheap replacements for it either... I’d done the veg the day before, so it can’t have gone out with the peelings, but I think it must have been binned somehow, because it isn’t here now!

For some years I kept a carrier bag of "wild" presents at the bottom of a wardrobe in the spare room. It has been gone many months now and I can't think where or how it can have disappeared! No-one would nick it. Have now started a new bag.