Alone at Christmas.

Our town is hosting a Christmas Dinner, at lunchtime on Christmas Day specifically for those who will be alone at Christmas. It’s been well advertised on local radio and in local shops.

While it might not be everyone’s cup of tea it was a ‘sell out’ last year. I’m full of admiration for those who are giving up their time, especially on a Christmas morning, to set this up and do all the cooking,

PS this is not for the homeless. There is a nearby shelter that will offer a meal for them.

There are many Christmas Dinners arranged for people who have nowhere else to go. I'll be going to one organised by the Food Bank this year. Last year they catered for 400 people.

I've also been invited to a house party and dinner on the 22nd. The man who invited me has a hot tub so I'll take my bikini.

I had Christmas on my own once, and it was a great empowering experience. Did what I wanted and felt the Christmas spirit in a different way. You’ve nothing to fear! I’ve never done it on my own since but if I had to I’d be happy to.

I remember an episode of Poirot where he was supposed to be spending Christmas alone. He was looking forward to it and bought some expensive Belgian chocolates to enjoy.

Like lots of folk here have suggested, spoil yourself rotten and do exactly what you want to do. Warm, cosy, well fed and watching a box set on tv with your feet up.

All the very best to you !

I’ve always secretly wanted to spend a Christmas on my own so I’m actually a bit envious. Plan your day and enjoy

I was feeling a bit down in the dumps thinking of Christmas because my DD always goes away over Christmas and New Year and we don’t get to see our only grandchild. However on reading this thread I realise how fortunate I am and have given myself a kick up the backside because I have so much to be grateful for. My heart goes out to those who have lost loved ones and are feeling so lonely

I had Christmas Day alone when I was first divorced but I thoroughly enjoyed the peace and quiet and a bit of self indulgent eating and TV watching. In fact some of my married friends were quite envious!

So sorry for all of you recently bereaved ....difficult at any time of year, but especially so when you see everyone else enjoying themselves ! I have spent a few Christmasses alone ....have to say I DID enjoy them ....did what I wanted when I wanted ...but a I was in full time work then, the break was lovely ! My brother looked forward to Christmas day .....he worked long hours up in Newcastle and he spent his day in bed which was a luxury he loved and never normally got to do ! My dad, on the other hand, was alone and told me, his neighbours, the lunch club et al, that he was going out for Christmas day ......just so he could stay on his own !

Here in the little French commune where I live, Christmas day is like any other ......Christmas Eve is the big family get together ....even had a workman turn up one Christmas day to finish laying the paving round the house ! the paper shop, bakers and small supermarket will be open for the morning ....no Boxing day here, so its back to normal immediately ...NY day is a holiday

I think if it bothered me, I would volunteer ...or look for
a group to have the day with ...what about your local Church ...or maybe Age Concern have a list of things happening for people who prefer company ...I think far too much is made of spending it with others .....which must only make those who are feeling lonely, feel worse !

Have a few plans .....I hope your day goes well !

I think its also worth remembering that being alone means no juggling, no walking on eggshells, no trying to please anyone else, accommodating fussy eaters, or trying to keep the peace.
Every cloud does have a silver lining, I suppose.

I have been widowed for 6 years, no children, no family except in-laws in this country. I usually get up late, have a cooked breakfast, open my presents and then spend the day either reading or catching up on films I have been meaning to watch. I have a late lunch and, weather permitting, will go out for a walk. Boxing Day I usually visit in laws.

Being on your own is difficult at first but I now find myself thinking of all the great times we had together and smile at all the times he would make me laugh when I got stressed over Christmas.

In the past they have invited me to spend Christmas day with them but they live the other side of the city and have no spare room so I would be unable to enjoy a glass or two of wine with lunch as I would have to drive home.

After dh died, darling daughter did try to spend Xmas with me but it became difficult as sil wanted to spend time with his family on the other side of the country.
I decided to go on a cruise instead and found it ideal!

Good on you Galen

Any relation to Galen of Pergamon?

I think if I was on my own I would consider a cruise, I have heard everyone is friendly and welcoming. I think we are brainwashed by the media into expecting a certain type of Christmas. All those festive adverts which in actual fact were filmed in the middle of Summer with rent-a-family from central casting!

I shall have Christmas Dinner with DD & her family. I will get there about 10, we all open our presents, DGS1 will be on "double duty" as DGS2 is only 7 months old.

After a lovely meal I will leave about 3 get thrown out , drive home & relax. I am lucky that I have family around me but I am equally happy on my own.

DM will spend her day alone (she lives 300 miles away), she eats what she wants, her freezer is full of delicious food. We will all ring her on Christmas Day. I saw my DM in early November & bought her Christmas Present. DM is nearly 89, as long as she has contact with her family.

Hello I’m new here never posted before. Anniebach your words are what made me want to post. I’m so sorry about your daughter and that you’ve been without your husband for so long. I have lost all my family apart from my son thank goodness for him. They all died from cancer except from my husband died very suddenly in March this year at work. I’m lost without him and Christmas will never be the same. I am keeping you in my thoughts x

The outcome (disappointed, satisfied or happy) depends on your own expectation of what Christmas is supposed to 'look' like.

Change all those preconditioned expectations, brush yourself off so to speak and see what happens! The opportunities are endless.....If you want to start a new tradition, plan a special activity for yourself such as attending to a Christmas spectacle or a special church service. Prepare a gourmet meal, set a spectacular table. Perhaps you can even invite a similarly lonely neighbor.

Find out if volunteers are needed to wrap gifts for needy children or serve meals for the poor at Christmas. Think about all the things that could otherwise make you happy and indulge yourself...a new puppy perhaps or could it be a trip to a new destination? You may not have the power to change others, but you do have the power to change how you react.

Wishing you your best Christmas ever!!!

I d just like to say my thoughts are with all those recently bereaved there’s nothing can make this any easier and Christmas is such a difficult one to get through
?

I prefer to have a relaxing day on my own...I can watch the Christmas prog I want to watch or a dvd. I can enjoy a glass of good wine plus the sparkling with my dinner and I can watch the Queen's speech. Christmas eve I will be driving in the dark out and back and on Christmas Day more driving...no time to relax. Sounds as if I am not grateful for invites but it is no different to any other day really. I don't get invited for meals at other times so why at Christmas....sighs

Anyway I digress. Have a relaxing pj day. Cook what you want drink what you want and watch what you want and enjoy xxx

If I were on my own I would definitely volunteer to the Salavation Army or Crisis. Really it is just another day to me so I would find plenty of things to catch up with which is what I normally do anyway....nothing more boring than sitting down after lunch and watching other people snore!

Lots of good advice here. I will be on my own for the 3rd year as DC and twin GC don't feel the need to acknowledge that I might be lonely. Put aside the idea that everyone is having a wonderful day, be kind to yourself and remember you are not alone. Do what you want and enjoy it!xx

Dear VENUS, you have my deepest sympathy. I shall be alone, but its of my own choosing so all I can say is, get through the day as best you can, and remember we're all here if you need us. xxxxx

Hello Nannymagic, welcome x

I am so sorry you have been widowed so recently, true Christmas cannot be the same again , but you have your son and he is part of your husband , nothing and no one can take away the time we spent with those we now grieve for.

I hope the day will be bearable for you, it is just one day . There are several of us who have to cope with grief this year . You can always come here if you need to.

Take care, God bless x

My late mum always wanted Christmas Day on her own doing her own thing reflecting on the past. She used to say that after having ten of us and 38 grandchildren and 12 great grandchildren, “it’s lovely having a quiet day”. Although she spent most of the day talking to family on the phone.

My mum died this time last year. She loved Christmas, and so wanted to get out of hospital to be with "her girls". (Me and my daughter) feeling very maudlin..