were you told you weren't in labour?

I was in the labour ward, having regular, though not dramatic, contractions. H turned up and asked the midwives how I was doing. They said it would be a long time before anything happened and he popped off home without seeing me. Half an hour later, DS2 decided it was time to make an appearance and his father missed his birth. I enjoyed making him feel guilty about that.

I remember giving birth to my first child,she was a week late and quite small. Been in labour about 12 hours and within a few seconds of pushing her out the Midwife,who hadn't been particularly helpful, turned to me and said'Are you sure you were due' !!

Its more common than I thought! Having my second, I went about four weeks past my supposed due date. I started with contractions, was taken into hospital where they admitted me, told my husband I'd be ok until the evening so he went off to look after our daughter. Soon after, they informed me I wasn't having contractions at all so should go home. I was so upset I began walking down through town with my suitcase, tears rolling down my face because I just couldn't sit there and wait for my husband to come all the way back! I often wonder what drivers thought as they passed this hugely pregnant crying woman with her suitcase! In the end I got so far, I was worried he'd never find me so I trudged all the way back up the hill to the hospital, husband arrived and so did strong contractions! Even when I was in the middle of really strong contractions, the midwife put her hand on my tummy and told me I definitely wasn't in labour, she knew better until my son emerged a few minutes later!

With my 2nd son, I woke in the night with contractions and even my ex husband told me I was just imagining it and said to go back to sleep ! Yes, it was 3 weeks premature, and yes it was also on my 1st sons 2nd birthday. I convinced him that I was def in labour, got my parents out of bed at 1am: to hear my Mum doubting me too ! They came round to be with my toddler, then me and my ex went to the hospital, and yes, I was told for the 3rd time by a nurse that I was too early and was I sure. I was sure and son number 2 was duly delivered on his brothers birthday ....

Luckily I had a straightforward labour and delivery both tines but the hospital first time round was horrible - not clean, and really off hand staff. Another mum (who I met there and who remained a friend) was berated and told to stop making a fuss, that she was not in labour, and MUST eat the cheese salad she has been given. (This was forty plus years ago - can you imagine it now?) She forced down the salad, promptly brought it up all over the bossy sister's apron, and delivered her son about twenty minutes later.

The best place for someone in labour is to stay at home and stay upright as long as possible! Midwives would advise mums not to come into hospital too early. No one can predict 100% when a baby will be born - it sounds as if some of the gransnetters had midwives who were poor at communication - As a midwife myself i would never have told someone they were not in labour as you never know for sure!! Have now had 16 grandchildren
(17th due yesterday) and they have all had good experience of child birth!

My youngest daughter was in labour and watching her I said to the midwife she’s going to have this baby soon. The midwife scoffed and said as it was a first baby there was plenty of time to go. I insisted she examine my daughter and when she did there was immediate panic stations. Baby was born less than a hour after my daughter was admitted!

I would do the opposite. When expecting our first born there was concerns over a Welsh activist group who were trying the blow up reservoirs etc. My husband was on night duty , baby due 1st March, we were living in a flat waiting for a police house, no neighbours. Doctor was concerned I was on my own at night and could fall or be taken ill, he arranged I was taken to the cottage hospital before my husband went on duty and collected next morning, this was to go on for a week. 4th February a very cross me was dropped off st the hospital, given a private ward and settled to sleep. A nurse looked in and I said this mattress is so hard, she fetched maternity sister , examined me and said you are in labour, know all said - no I'm not, not ready until 1st March, she said - you may not be ready but the baby is. Our darling daughter arrived 40 minutes later . Husband had no idea, sister phoned the station, station phoned H.Q. And her birth was announced on every police radio in the force. That was some entry into the world

Same as Aggie, much eye rolling, given a sleeping tablet, husband sent home, delivered within the hour

Not me but when my youngest D had her first baby she was told to stay at home and have a warm relaxing bath as having contractions every 3 minutes wasn't a reason to go to hospital. Once I saw the blood in the bath we heaved her out and straight to the hospital where despite her protestations they insisted on a formal admission and a wee test. Even when her waters seeped under the loo door they weren't worried. Her baby arrived on the admissions room floor less than 5 minutes after arrival. The look on the midwife's face as she yelled down the corridor "2 midwives and 4 pillows, here, NOW!" will remain indelibly printed in my mind. D's 2nd came just as quickly but they were prepared this time...... !

I was in labour with my 3rd child. I was already in hospital and the nurse offered me Paracetamol. She told my husband to go home because nothing was going to happen. By the time they agreed I was in labour I was 7cm dilated and they refused to give me any Pethidine(which was probably correct at 7cm). I shouted and swore and was told off by the sister for my language. Baby was born half an hour later.

I was told I wasn’t in labour with the first who was born 7 hours later. We were told the second one ‘wouldn’t be born for hours’ and my husband had to point out that the baby was already being born

You are fine... you are fine... please check... please check... oh just checked, can't get gowns on quick enough, waters sealed...baby born ten seconds after second breaking of waters... catch..took many hours to convince not all right and much pain and many months after of stress and not bonding, horrible memory but still sharp

As the daughter of a doctor who had a lot of home confinements, I think I realise what has gone wrong. Hope there is a midwife or obstetrician who will back me up.

Waters break fairly late on in a normal labour, just before baby makes an appearance. Telling you you are not in labour until your waters break is sheer and utter nonsense. You could have been having contractions for hours at that point!

I never had the experience of going to hospital in labour. All four of my babies were late and induced. I don’t think labour is induced as readily now, which is good.

With my first pregnancy my waters broke and they called me in. It was a reall busy night and my husband and I were just left all alone. Suddenly I wanted to push and my husband grabbed a passing midwife. She said I couldn’t possibly want to push yet, then examined me and I was rushed into the delivery suite. Six hour from start to finish,no pain relie. Not even gas and air!.

Relief

I was definitely in labour with my first one and the midwife who examined me said "Oh this one isn't going to be very long" and sent me up to the labour ward. The midwife who examined me there said "What on earth have they sent you up for? You aren't nearly ready" Sadly she was right and I was there for hours!

My 4 year old granddaughter was present in the delivery room when my daughter had her second baby earlier this year. Cutting short a long and quite distressing story of total unprofessionalism, my daughter ended up falling on to the bed on all fours from where my granddaughter could see between her arms, and said “my baby’s coming, my baby’s coming” , “ not yet she isn’t “ said the midwife. Then a tiny baby still in the sac appeared on the bed!!
My daughter had been ignored, not examined and we were all treated as inferior beings. Luckily all was well but no thanks to the midwives. It was a similar scenario with her first delivery. So my advice to any pregnant mum is just scream and make as much fuss as possible, then you might get a bit of attention and some help.
To those throwing their arms up in horror at a child being present I will say it was a beautiful experience for my granddaughter. My daughter was quietly getting on with labour and the little one neither saw nor heard anything untoward. And with tears of joy, she was holding her little sister when she was just minutes old.

With my first son (46 years ago) I was told if your waters break you must come in - I got out of bed at 4 in the morning and the noise of the water hitting the floor woke my husband. We duly went off to the hospital in a car that only did 2 miles to the gallon and they admitted me and sent him off to work. I had no contractions until midday but they didn't suggest going home or that I wasn't in labour. He was born 4 hours later - no pain killers or gas and air (I was scared it would make me sick). Husband rang after work to be told he had a son and was allowed in at visiting time. Babies were kept in the maternity unit and only brought out at feeding time swaddled within an inch of their lives - we were not woken during the night for feeds either. Stayed in hospital for 10 days and only shown how to bathe them on the last day.

My second experience 3 years later was much worse. In and out of the same hospital for 6 weeks before the birth I kept insisting I was in labour 2 weeks before my due date and went back in again but they still said I wasn't - they did admit me though. 24 hours later after pethidine and gas and air they took me to the delivery ward but still said I wasn't ready. My lovely doctor arrived to examine me at 9am and said he would break my waters -he turned round to leave the ward after he'd done it and whoosh out shot my second son! Babies were still not kept in the ward and only brought out for feeding but we were allowed to change them. We were still kept in for 10 days though and husbands were not allowed to stay with us. How things have changed now!

yes in pain i was admitted in to pre-natal ward on Sunday night, told i had a urine infection, Tuesday night i was in agony Older nurse told me off for moaning got some sort of injection hours later from grumpy nurse, then went to loo and the cleaner Told me i was in labour, and had i told anyone? rushed down to delivery suite at 9 cm. DD 1 arrived soon after, husband just made it in time.

OK not wishing to rain on anybody’s parade, but 40 or more years down the line is this really something at the forefront of our memories?

1973, first pregnancy, taken in to be induced the following day as I was enormous and 5 days late. I woke in middle of the night and felt I wanted to push. I rang the bell and told the midwife, but she told me not to be ridiculous as I hadn't had any first stage contractions yet. A lot of arguing and 10 minutes later midwife agreed to have a look. Then she went into panic mode and rushed me down to delivery suite, and three pushes later a 9lb 10oz daughter arrived! 30 minutes from start to finish!

I woke up about 6.30 with severe back pain, OH went off to work. As I had GP appointment I rang Surgery, Receptionist said I'll arrange GP visit (this was around 9). Less than an hour later I was ringing Surgery again, waters had broken, spoke to GP who said he'd send Ambulance but not to worry as I'd be hours!!!. Ambulance arrived, long drive to Hospital with poor Ambulance man saying "don't push". Arrived at Hospital, being wheeled to Labour Ward when I let out an almighty yell, Delivery Room pronto, DD born minutes later.

Nurse rang my DH at Cattle Auction & was amazed when he calmly told her he would be over later in the afternoon. He was over 30 miles away buying calves (he was a Cattle Dealer)

Mawbroom, as this is a thread about whether women were told they weren't in labour when they actually were, people are bound to be sharing their memories of that subject. It doesn't mean those are the only memories we have!