Soop's welcoming kitchen...

That’s a long wait, Maw but it’s giving you the time you need. I’m glad you’ve found a priest you know and like, to concelebrate the funeral Mass. That’s important. I agree, I would not like such an important event to be celebrated by strangers. I’m glad you have such a lovely friend and neighbour and lots of family around at the moment. Keep yourself busy and keep coming in here. x

I also need a clothes clear out galen, you’ve put me to shame, always a reason not to do it - I need a sigh emoticon here.

I’m not sure I will find the right words, maw but I’ll try. There’s no rush to say the final goodbye to your beloved husband, it’s important the priest is right for you and also right for him. So waiting for a warm heart to be able to be a co celebrant feels just the right thing to do. As tegan says there is always something left to say or ask, in fact after 28 years I still find myself asking things of my Mum but I think that’s universal. Of course paw must be comfortable, the slippers are just right. I’m so pleased you have such wonderful care close by. A day at a time and be gentle with yourself. There’s much love here for you as well as out there.

I admire your slimming world achievement, n&g, I was advised to shed a little weight to take pressure off the flipping knee, couple of pounds over goodness knows how many weeks probably isn’t what was meant . I am exercising as advised though, so not all bad.

Well, I had intended some admin this morning but have a fibro-foggy head so will go out instead, it’s a bit damp here which might wash the fog away.

Thinking of you Maw

Thinking of you constantly, Maw. There must be a special heaven for St Andreans. We buried my Dad in his Alumnus tie and there will be a welcoming group up there for your dear husband. You know he is still there in your loving DC and GC.

When I read your post this morning, Maw it brought a lump to my throat for all kinds of reasons, but not least for the need to “get things right”. When my dear sister died, her youngest of her five sons came to me in a state of great sadness and said they couldn’t decide what clothes were appropriate to take to the funeral home, so we went and chose something I knew she had loved wearing and looked very good in. They said they probably wouldn’t even have given it a second look. I came across a photograph of her in the same clothes just last week. Happy, smiling, just the way I like to remember her. You do Paw - and yourself - the very greatest service by getting things right for him in every respect.
DH is back to the decorating today - and I now have his cold! Bah humbug!

I am back from the GP. I was told what a wonderful job I was doing, I should try to get out with friends for one half day a week so that I feel better about the other six an d a half days.
I must treat H as I would a three year old and smile and be patient all the time.
No medication will help at all I am on my own,Well thanks for nothing.
I have had a huge row with my S and came home and cried, so not me, H just sat and said, there is football on television tonight.

Ann, I am so sorry to hear how low you are. There are no words I can find which will make you feel better, except that there are lots of people here offering you support. This is where you can let it all out, without anyone being judgemental.
My mother had Alzheimers and my father vascular dementia, I was their sole carer, as my brother didn't want to know. It was so hard, so I have some idea of what you are going through. x

Ann I do not know what to say- how insensitive of your GP. He knows your age and also the other problems that you have- a bit of sympathy would not have gone amiss. Is he going to "baby sit" when you pop out for half a day a week? The devilment in me thinks that the next time you visit him you should say that you can no longer cope and see what he says.

Ann sending my love and hugs to you. My parents both had dementia and I know how hard it is to look after someone who is no longer the person you once knew.
I have no advice but please remember that we are all here for you.
The last few weeks have shown me how kind and caring the Gransnet community is .

Oh annsixty, as if your unfeeling doctor wasn't enough, having 'words' with your S must have really brought you down. I'm so sorry. Sending ((hugs)) but wish I could help you

Oops! Posted too soon.

Maw, your post brings back painful memories and I know a little of the roller coaster of emotions you will be experiencing. I know you will plan the perfect send off for your dear H, and I hope it will bring some comfort to you and family

This morning I received a text from DD3's boyfriend asking if I could help him. He wants to buy her an engagement ring but needs to know her size! It's top secret and I am hopeless at keeping quiet when I'm bursting with some happy news for a change!

I know my Granspals won't let the cat out of the bag at any rate!

Ann I just can’t imagine how difficult your life must be, but I know the feeling of despair and upset you are probably going through now.
I can only send love and (((hugs))) and hope that something will improve for you soon xx

Bella What lovely news for you! She will be so happy. When is it going to happen, do you know? Xxx

Ann I had so hoped that there would be something more positive from your visit to the GP. Keeping you in my thoughts and sending you a big hug!
Lovely news, Bella! How romantic!

Sorry to boil over like that but I have to do it somewhere.
The GP was another locum, she was a lovely young Asian woman, I just felt she needs to experience a bit more of older folk's problems.
Lovely news Bellasnana really something to look forward to.
Thank you all for your very kind thoughts.

Where else would you expect to boil over but in a kitchen, Ann, and this one is the best one to do it in! ??

I’m another with a lump in my throat, and a teary eye too, as I read your post maw. I’m glad the plans are coming together and you have the time you need to feel you can get it right, it’s so important and I think I’d want that myself. What a lovely friend to send some tasty food, that kind of thoughtfulness nourishes the soul as much as the body.
Ann I’m so sorry your GP was not more empathic. You’re realistic enough to know they can’t wave a magic wand but talking to someone who just “ gets” how life is for you could have made all the difference. Sadly families don’t always “get it” either”. Rant away here as much as you need to! Sending you virtual ? and anything else that helps, I’m just sorry it’s nothing practical.
I read your post, n&g, nodding sagely in agreement and thinking of the importance of healthy eating... then realised I was accidentally munching a packet of crisps, well they were low fat ones..
I had a whole list of jobs to do today while the old boy is out walking with a pal. I have done none of them but have got a few other things out of the way. Does that count?
Bella what exciting times for you!
Right time to get back to that list, but then again... !

soop rang a little while ago to say that she has no internet so can't post a long message she had just typed out for maw. I'm sure she would have sent sympathy to ann too. Both of you are in hard times

Thinking of you Maw ? and you are in my thoughts as well Ann

Bellasnanna; my SIL came to see me with an engagement ring to ask for my permission etc [how sweet!]. They were going abroad for a holiday and he was going to propose whilst they were away. Part way through the holiday she phoned me up; thank goodness I didn't burst out with congratulations because he hadn't proposed at that time and she was just phoning to see if the cat was ok. I still have panic attacks about how I could have put my foot in it #blunderwomanstrikesagain

Evening all!

So sorry to hear about the outcome of your GPS visit Ann , to be frank it sounds rubbish!! Do you have a GP who knows you rather than a locum that you could get to see ?

If it makes you feel better Corner I put on a pound at the weigh in.... that damn village bakery!! So I have bought a new Comfort Food Cookbook to help us get back on track ( after my slice of lemon drizzle cake!) !

How exciting Bellasnana..... can’t wait to hear how it all goes!!

My poor daughter rang today and is at the end of her tether. Her husband was in a car accident yesterday ( he was unharmed) someone , not paying attention, hit him from behind and it looks like their old but reliable car will be written off for not much money.

Certainly not enough to get another half way decent car. They don’t have much in savings as they have been paying off old debts on their credit cards to get in a good position for possibly moving. I so feel for them . Why is it always one step forward and two steps back?

I think the bank of Mum and Dad might have to help - I never really wanted a craft studio in my garden [ smile]

Buggerations galore! I returned home to begin a lengthy message to you lot Half way through the amber light started to flash on the computer. Message lost. Broadband down! Lots of swearing from yours truly. Notified dear Bags and felt rotten because she trying to have forty winks.
Called helpline. On the phone to a Geordie BT expert. He was very patient. An hour later, we were asked to hang up and await a call back. Call back notified us that our broadband connection would be operational by late afternoon on the 17th. I swore a whole lot more. Then, a mini miracle...MacS checked the computer and the green light was back. And so am I.

I shall now do my best to catch up. Please be patient.

Maw I'm happy to think that Paw will be wearing his best bib and tucker and his comfortable slippers. You are constantly on my mind.

Bellasnana Lovely, lovely happy news.

ann I can only echo the remarks of other Granspals. We all know that you need more free time in which to recharge your batteries. Hells bells...the GP could have been more sensitive. Us lot are here for you. Please feel free to let off steam as often as you need to.

N&G So sorry to hear of the accident that has caused your daughter and son-in-law to lose their car. Thank goodness that no one was injured. Thank goodness for kind and understanding parents. Consider the craft studio put on hold, not scuppered.

I sometimes slip into the kitchen to sit quietly in the corner and just to listen to the lovely gossip. (Love your pictures Soop, I dabble in watercolours but have a long way to go,)

I just want to say to Ann - did you cry? If you need help or support you need to cry and become a blubbery wreck in front of the doctor. If you’re logical and reasonable and s/he thinks you can cope you’ll get nowhere. It goes completely against the grain, but sob, it generally works! (Go when the weather is cold as watery eyes give you a head start!)

Marydoll Please visit us more often.

Tegan2 When I visited the funeral parlour together with my newly bereaved father, someone had coiffed my mother's hair and added a little pink lipstick. My father said..."Doesn't Mummy look very much better today..."

JaneD3 I'm rather partial to gingerbread. Any going spare?

kitty Lottie's antics made me chuckle. I bet the cats are pleased. I wouldn't mind betting that your lipstick was deposited in the loo. Torben tried to flush his mummy's mobile phone away. It never did work after that! Neither did my watch which he took into the bath without my knowledge.

anno we have a harmless spider spray based on Horse Chestnut oil. So far, so good.

Galen I find clearing out the wardrobe and taking good quality items of clothing to the Red Cross shop is therapeutic. The Campbeltown shop is wonderful. The windows are always eye-catching. Inside, in spite of limited space, the clothing is displayed with care and flair.