The New Argy Bargy cafe, please pop in!?

Too late Meno ! When the Admiral and I had a "meeting" last night, he had what looked like wet rot on his leg.
Tomorrow is the big day! I can partake of alcohol again, so set 'em up Lemon. ?????
Actually, I may prefer a cuppa ☕ and?

Wuss!
Oh alright then,

Sorry Meno I didn’t quite make it to the gazunder in time.

For goodness sake I've got enough to do without clearing up after the clientele

Lemon have you used up that industrial sized box of xxl Tena Lady that you had delivered last month? Sheesh! How have you got through 500 of them in a month!

They have been used to mop up all the verbal diarrhoea on this thread.

Well, Meno when you drink the amount that I do in here, it all has to go somewhere!
Set ‘em up! ?????☕️???

Anyone up for Karaoke Nite soon?

Shhh! I'm practising The Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia lemon. Am I allowed to bring my kazoo?

We would be distraught if you didn’t bring it Chewy
Which night shall we hold it on?
I am practising My Old Man Said Follow The Van.??

Sunday? It's always a slow night in here on a Sunday. Although I have to be up for work the next day and so wouldn't be able drink more than a couple of bottles of gin. Marydoll doesnt have to get up to go to work though. The admiral keeps her in the lap of luxury, apparently. in fact, she's on the admiral's lap more than is good for her in my opinion

Right, Sunday night it is then, hope a few more can make it here ( through the snow?!)
I will put the bunting back up and the fairy lights.??

Snow? Snow lemon? What snow?

I'm practising "Ernie, the fastest milkman in the west"

The snow that is about to descend on Scotland and the North this weekend....ye ken noo?

I shall deep fry some Mars Bars behind the bar to keep us all warm.

Marydoll.....I always fancied two ton Ted from Teddington
?

Aaaahhh were those the Mars Bars, which were stashed in the outside lav? I ate them all. Sorry!

Grrrrr.....is anything safe with you around Marydoll, I mean Mars Bars, Poteen, Men etc.?

I have issues...

With food, men, women, relationships, shopping, drink, etc. etc, etc.

Did you eat those nuts that I left in a bowl on the bar Mary?

Oh?Were those not nuts????

Erm yeah, they were nuts Marydoll, but they'd been covered in a chocolatey yoghurt coating. I sucked the chocolatey yoghurt coating off but I didn't like the nuts, so I put them in the bowl, ready to throw to the pigeons in the yard. Didn't think anyone would want to eat nuts that I'd sucked.

Yukkkkkkkkkk?