Things my parents said ...

Ps this thread has made me smile, for a change thanks

I'm sorry to lower the tone but here's my mother's favourite saying. We'd shout "it's not fair" she'd reply "nor is a pigs arse" I was over 50 before I 'got' it. A pigs arse isn't fur it's pig skin! Or when we exaggerated she'd tell us "that's as far fetched as a bucket of shit from china" she used most of the saying quoted here. At the time it really wound me up. Of course now I remember it with affection and when our family are together we love regaling all her funny saying and making our children and each other laugh.

"Going to see a man about a dog" meant my dad was going to the pub in our house. That and "Back of Bill's mothers to see Mary" or "There and back to see how far it is" were the only answers I ever got when I asked an adult where they were going.

When my hair was messy, my mom used to say my parting was like a donkey's hind leg which always made me laugh. OH said his mother used to say it, too but he misheard her and, for years, was puzzled about a donkey with an iron leg!

Another favourite, if little Sis or I were pouting about something, was, "Put your bottom lip away or I'll hang a bucket on it."

whats for dinner
elephants ears and saurkraut???????????

in the states in the 50s-70s it was
"children starving in china would be glad to get that""
"keep it up your face will freeze like that"
(on pouting/stick out tongue etc)
have heard"i brought you into this world,i cantake you out."(uncle to obnoxious cousin)
oh good lord i used to have hair in rags torture too..and i didnt even want the ringlets.
we lived on a river so it was"if your friends jumped off the bridge would you"
my argument tho was not appreciated(dad and friends used to jump off the railroad bridges into the river)

And the response in our house to "It`s not fair" was "It is fair, it`s not raining."

When asking "What's for dinner" the response was often "wait & see"....I thought 'wait & see' came in about 40 varieties until I was about 8!

"Stand for something or you'll fall for anything" was another favourite of mum's when encouraging us to take part in events, or when homework was having to put one side of an argument forward for debate.

Maw I am slow tonight - just got the joke about the puppy!

If we threw a tantrum, my aunt would say we should get a place at RADA.

My Dad - Have you heard the story about the three wells? No? Well, well, well.

We were offered Scotch mist too

My mums favourite saying if we asked what was for dinner was "a Wigwam for a Wild Duck" or Scotch Mist and Gravy!
My Uncle Jacks was Duck and Pea, duck under the table and pee outside

Or, 'shaking hands with Nelson'

Has anyone mentioned "Going to see a man about a dog" meaning going to the loo?
I had set my heart on a puppy and cried buckets once when my Dad returned once without the aforementioned dog.

My granny used to refer to being punctual (or even early) as "falling in with the doors".

My Scottish grandpa would occasionally press a threepenny bit or even a sixpence into my hand and say "Mind you don't spend it all in the one shop"

We had dry bread and pullet (pull it?). Put wood in t'ole.
Were you born in a barn
Pulled through a hedge backwards
Time to go up the dancers (stairs, it's bedtime)
Take off your coat and look as though your're stopping
Pride's painful (wearing fashionable but uncomfortable shoes).
My grandmother used to say if I picked my nose I'd get a pig's foot - anyone know what a pig's foot is?

I'd love to know where 'over the back of Foster's front' really is.

My MIL used to say it to vaguely describe a location but nobody had a clue where she was talking about and I'm not so sure she did either.

Scribbles

Gran, when surprised: well! I'll go to the foot of our stairs!

Mom, when I cried: Stop that or I'll give you something to cry about.

Dad, when I was being fussy over food: You'd better eat it now or you'll get it cold for breakfast.

And so many more of those listed here; I've loved reading them.

PS. How on earth did jollyg get his/her name?! (OK, OK. I'm going)

To be honest, I thought jollyg's post was rather odd and possibly written by someone quite young - that or ghosty gransnetters past come to try to make mischief again.

Funny isn't it, that in a pre-social media world, so many of us were brought up with the same sayings. I grew up with bread and pullet on offer and our 'dad's 'standard joke, trotted out almost daily:

Shall I put the kettle on?
It won't fit you!

My Nan always said "oh you remember so-and-so? Used to work on the buses"

Another one of my grandfathers was "Oh yes, I know who you mean, his mother used to mangle our stairs" !

^You are pretty silly to have such a thread, regarding your MUM.

Mischief making in extremis.^

jollyg what a hurtful, judgmental, and totally unwarranted post!

You go on to say Some folk here have enough problems with heath, families.

Perhaps those people with such problems, are glad of a bit of light hearted relief to distract them, even if only for a brief moment.

Please feel free to carry out your threat.

MiL used the "all fur coat and no knickers " and also "red and green should never be seen" about clothes colours. Mum used "mutton dressed up as lamb" and Nan used to threaten that she would " smack your bottom until it bleeds buttermilk"! She never did!

Me to DS eat your tea, think of all the starving millions.

DS to me at a later date, Mummy if you don't hurry up and get my the I'll be a starving million!

My friends adage, A friend will always help you, a good friend will help you bury the body.