Come the revolution

Don't settle for being third, Anniebach Insist on your rightful place.

No butter, * gilly* unless you are a member of the inner policy-making committee with a red ration-book.

Surely not third in line Anniebach

I love spuds too and could happily eat them every day (as long as we were allowed a decent quota of butter).

Annie what are you saying - the benign dictatorship will be pacifist so there will be no firing squads. As pacifists they will disband the armed forces and invite Putin to "advise" on policy. In return he will accept those in need of "re-education", and beyond the help offered on the lentil plantation, to attend the various establishments in Siberia set up for that purpose.

But I love potatoes and hate lentils, come to think of it I won't be affected , my posts on GN will be the cause to put me third in line to the firing squad on day one

Workers at the lentil plantation can look forward to entertainment in the form of hourly broadcasts of the beloved leaders speeches. The Tory Satan in human form, Jacob Rees-Mogg, will be wheeled out on the half hour for workers to throw rotten fruit at, uniforms will be provided but due to the wicked Tory cuts will be restricted to one size fits all. Internet access will be available but the sites visited will be restricted to those approved by the beloved leader, GNs political threads will be compulsory.

Potatoes on Sundays and as a special treat, a courgette once a fortnight if you have fulfilled your quota.

The Anglo Welsh Federal Union of Lentileers railway company (usually known by an acronym) will offer special rates to deportees recruits to its labour force - return tickets will cost whatever is in your bank account, plus admin fees, naturally. One way tickets free. Wages at the lentil plantation will be nil, you will be rewarded in kind (a shack shared with 27 other workers and as many lentils as you can eat)

I will start packing now, I hate lentils ?

Pruning not prining. Perpetrators of spelling errors in state pronouncements will be sent to the gulag lentil farms.

Hairdressers and beauty therapists will be co-opted into prining fruit trees and applying anti-bug and anti-mould preparations to crops (limited to lentils, potatoes and courgettes)

Vanity is not for the workers party sunseeker

lemongrove beards?!!! even for women? That could solve my chin hair problem.

Holidays, holidays ? You are talking wealth , bullet for you or, crumbs we haven't got a Siberia , where can we send you? And DO NOT say Wales please

Very good Sunseeker and there will be no more seeking the sun either, holidays in the UK will be encouraged, wet walks and visits to see the workers packing sardines will become all the rage, as will vest wearing and beards.

sunseeker, the perfect communist state ?

Well I think you are all being unduly pessimistic. Come the revolution everything with be wonderful. There will no longer be any property ownership (property is theft). Houses will be confiscated and used to house those who were unable to buy property under the hated Tories. The previous "owners" will be allowed to remain, living in the smallest bedroom and negotiating times for using the kitchen and bathroom with the other residents. This will not, of course, apply to our political betters as they will need to keep their houses and also be supplied with second homes at the expense of the tax payer. The monarchy will, of course, be abolished as will parliament with Momentum setting up a "benign" dictatorship. This will follow the practice of other dictatorships in that the current leader will be allowed to name his successor, preferably a family member (thereby obviating the need for elections). Preference for job applications will be given to those who are members of the Labour party and the relevant union. As a persecuted minority travellers will be allowed to camp on any field, park or garden they choose. There will be no need for grazing fields in any event as vegetarianism will be compulsory with the aim of everyone eventually becoming vegan. These are just a few of the advantages we can look forward to come the revolution!

Oh I love it Oldwoman and agree with it

How do you recognise a communist - someone who reads Marx and Lenin

How do you recognise an anti-communist - someone who understands Marx and Lenin

Hair cut or wig Old Woman?

It is now the case Icyalittle

loopyloo gransnet will only be able to express pro Corbyn sentiments - I thought that was already the case?

That is a frightening thought Chewbacca - will women have to have a Diane Abbott hair cut? (I can't afford that much hair spray!)

Will we all have to have a Comrade Corbyn hair cut like Kim Jong Un insists the North Koreans do? OMG!

Yes Elegran , it's been a friendly and fun thread

Humour is the enemy of self-importance. Not welcome in a totalitarian state. Those who bring the hierarchy into disrepute will feel the wrath of the establishment. There will probably be a law against it.